to take my complaint to the headmaster? Genuine opinions wanted

[namechangenamechange]

DD is in year 2. Her "PPA" teacher who she has once a week as cover for her normal form tutor was reading to the children from the minipins book. When they left for the day, she picked out 12 children in the class who were "slim" "beautiful" "lovely and "skinny" and said they cold get their coats on first and said "the other 15 of you are too fat and big you'll have to go second, you're not as lovely and sknny as the others.

In what planet is it ok to classify children according to their weight?????

I should clarify here, that DD, despite being in the second group, is actually officially underweight at the doctors, as she is quite tall for her age - but she was in the fat group! That however is irrelevant, my argument is that children should never be criticised for baing fat by a teacher, or made to feel like the less good group simply by weight, which at age of 6 is nothing to do with them anyway.

I went back in to school immediately after my daughter told me this and spoke to this temp teacher. She said it was due to the book and the story of the book, but said anyone who would get upset about it was stilly, then she said to me DD, "don't be upset by this, a lot of other children in the class are much fatter and uglier than you are but don't tell them that".

On the grounds that she:-

1. classified children by weight and made the skinny group the good children and the fat group the bad group
2. Used the word fat in a deroggatory manner
3. Failed to accept that this was a problem when questioned and
4. Further repeated to DD in front of me that other children were fat and ugly

I think I should take the following points to the headmaster.

What are people's thoughts of this? I know the teacher has been complained about before for mnay different reasons and that is why she, close to retirement, is on PPA cover rather than having her own class.

Message withdrawn

So what's your usual MN name then?

is this the word of your 6 yr old though?

OMG - assuming this account is accurate and can be independently confirmed by other children - definitely take it to the head.

Hmmm. I'm really finding it difficult to believe that any teacher would behave like this, or that if they did, you would need advice from mumsnet. It's fairly obvious that a teacher who DID do this, would warrant a serious complaint, you don't really need us to tell you that, do you?

My jaw nearly hit the floor when I read this. I cannot believe a teacher would even consider doing this, let alone justifying it in the way she did and then making her further remarks to your dd!

StewieGriffinsMum is right - a letter of complaint to the Head, the Chair of Governors and the LEA.

Do other parents share your outrage? If not, I'd suspect wrong end of the stick but definitely a weird one.

Will be interested to see the outcome.

Yanbu. Complain to the headmaster. A teacher should never talk to childen like that.

YADNBU

Take her down to Chinatown.

If this is true, why would you even be asking if this was unreasonable?

It honestly sounds as though that teacher is utterly bonkers. Did this really happen? I'd be writing to the governors, the head and the LEA. Oh and I would probably tell her that she needed her head looking at. You're being terribly restrained ...

I'm glad I'm not the only person who doesn't believe this.

Doubters -I have fully explained:-

1. why I am using another name (a mistake, because I forgot to change it back)
2. why I haven't changed back to my normal name (so as not to identify myself from another thread)
3. Why I am asking Am I unreasonable (due to other parents reactions that the head will not do much evn if I do complain)
4. That I am a regular MNetter and not a troll
5. That the teacher confirmed directly to me what DD had said and more besides, so I am not just taking the word of a 6 year old.

Please keep your doubts of my honesty away from this thread, they are not assisting the matter at all, what I required was opinion of the situation, not opinions as to my honesty.

namechange - just ignore the doubters - doesnt matter if they dont believe you anyway. Think the majority opinion on here is that the teacher's behaviour was ridiculous and lots of support for you going to complain. And if the head teacher is blase about it, take it further.

Teachers are so hugely influential on children - especially when they are really young - they believe everything teachers say, so being classed in the group that has to wait while the slimmer prettier ones get things first could stick with them for a long long time.

when my dd was in yr2, only the blond haired girls were chosen to be angels in the christmas play, my dd (having lots of wild dark hair) still remembers it

i would go bloody mental at that teacher ..

The fact that we all want you to be a troll demonstrates quite how outrageous this is.

daftpunk, I'm in my (very!) late 30s and I STILL remember the unfair casting in the nativity plays in junior school. Blondes only for Mary, angels, any significant part. Grrr.

My mother pointed out that Mary was very, very, very unlikely to have had blonde hair, being Jewish and all, which made me feel a tad better.

Awful, just awful. Go in and tell her she's not so bloody beautiful and she's overweight and that's YOUR OPINION. Bloody cow.

oh yes edam..the unfair casting in the school nativity play is still alive & kicking!

Marvellous.

edam in our town - you could be an angel if you were blonde, but you could only be Mary if you had dark hair.

Blonde angels, blonde Mary and blonde Queen Elixabeth II (jubilee year) at my schools.

Complain.

Am pleased to say our school operates a casting on merit system and we have had angels, Father Christmas and Holy Families from a wide variety of faiths and ethnic origins. I am amazed people are still encountering this sort of thing in Britain now, it's awfully sad reading .