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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed over this gift?

19 replies

MotherChristmas2OliverJames · 27/12/2008 22:49

When christmas was approaching i had decided on a toy i wanted to buy DS, i mentioned it to XMIL and she decided she was going to buy it, i let it drop and decided to just look for something else.

I told my mum about this and she suggested that i tell XMIL that they were going to buy it and then i could still getting it but i told her i will just leave it.

Christmas morning we are all around the tree and mum and dad give me a present to unwrap with DS and it is that present, my heart sinks straight away but i don't say anything, hoping that XMIL maybe got something else in the end.

Went to XMILs and she had got DS this toy, so i didn't say anything because i don't see them very often and thought i will just get my mum and dad to exchange their gift instead.

i take the gift home and ask mum if they have the receipt but conveinently can't find it.

I have considered sticking the item on ebay but because its not very light would prob be pointless

so i was put in the awkward position of having to ask XMIL to take it back.

I know that my mum was doing it because she was annoyed at XMIL for being so forceful but ended up making me feel bad.

OP posts:
butterscotch · 27/12/2008 22:52

Family you can't win! XMIL shouldn't have pushed you into letting them doing imho, however your mum was probably trying to stick up for you make you stand up to XMIL can't buy or exchange family huge sigh

singyswife · 27/12/2008 22:52

If you know where the gift came from I would chance my luck and take it back to the shop claiming it was from a granny who cannot find the receipt and could you just swap it for seomthing else. I have done this in the past and as long as you are confident about what you are saying they will swap it. They will just resell what you have handed in so they are not losing anything and then you have upset no one.

chloemegjess · 27/12/2008 22:53

If you know somebody else with a child the same age maybe you could swap something? Or you could use it as a gift?

ShinyPinkShoes · 27/12/2008 22:53

Could you not just return and exchange the one your Mum bought?

Most will exchange without a receipt.

Original poster
MotherChristmas2OliverJames · 27/12/2008 22:53

I just wish i would have had the balls to tell her "no, i am going to get it" when she decided she liked my idea

Why can't people just think of their own gifts instead of being bombarded with "what would XXX want for xmas" months before the event?

OP posts:
NCBirdy · 27/12/2008 22:54

Can you not try taking your mothers back and explain there is no receipt but you would be happy to exchange for something else in the shop? I know a lot of shops are happy with that after christmas - you may loose out if it has been in a sale but it would be better than Ebay?

I understand your mothers point but she has no right to put you in such a bad position really

Original poster
MotherChristmas2OliverJames · 27/12/2008 22:56

It was a main present, a little people garage so is big. i have already asked XMIL if she can exchange and she is going to but i just hated being put in the position of having to do it.

Am annoyed with the both of them tbh.

OP posts:
Yurtgirl · 27/12/2008 22:58

Most shops would accept an exchange without a refund surely - if it is in perfect condition etc

I would try taking it back

ShyBaby · 27/12/2008 23:07

Why do people do this competitive gift buying? My parents did this all the time. Nearly every Christmas I ended up with a duplicate gift because they tried to outdo each other...and then they would argue about who was taking their gift back!

Ashantai · 27/12/2008 23:09

If you dont get a refund, then you can probably get a credit note without a receipt. Toys r us do this if the item is in pristine condition, and then you can just get another gift instead of the faff of Ebay

butterscotch · 27/12/2008 23:11

Parents who'd have 'em huh?????

MC2OJ's - I have learnt with my MIL to not mention anything I am ever considering buying tis' a pain in the butt

LadyOfWaffle · 27/12/2008 23:12

You can exchange without a receipt.

thumbElf · 27/12/2008 23:14

I think, not knowing either your ma or mil, I would be more peed off with your own ma over this. She shouldn't have bought the same present, knowing that your MIL had offered, and then put you in the position of having to ask your MIL to exchange - that smacks of petty childishness and is unfair on you.

Original poster
MotherChristmas2OliverJames · 27/12/2008 23:23

I am annoyed at both of them but tbh i think most of my annoyance over XMIL is more to do with that fact she doesnt seem to want to see DS unless i chase her to.

My mum is extrememly childish at times and quite attention seeking.

If i had have just told her (XMIL) no, this wouldnt have happened

OP posts:
chloemegjess · 27/12/2008 23:27

I agree that I think your Mum was more out of order than your xMIL. Sorry

Original poster
MotherChristmas2OliverJames · 27/12/2008 23:53

I hope i dont come across as ungrateful, i appreciate any gifts DS has got, i just hate having been put in this position.

OP posts:
Original poster
MotherChristmas2OliverJames · 27/12/2008 23:59

I just wanted to make it clear that i am not unappreciating because the OP of the other 'present' thread was called ungrateful and i just wanted to clarify that i am not ungrateful about this.

OP posts:
thumbElf · 28/12/2008 00:06

M2OJ, you don't come across as ungrateful, but yr mum does come out of this looking worse than your Mil, imo.

ladymariner · 28/12/2008 00:07

The other op was very ungrateful. Different thread and situation altogether!

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