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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be so BLOODY ANGRY with this women.

85 replies

dustystar · 19/12/2008 14:05

I am so angry I can't stop shaking

We were supposed to be getting a puppy on wed. A freind of my sisters had been asked to find him a homw and she couldn't take him so they asked me and dh. We have wanted a dog for ages so we said yes.

They live about 1 1/2 drive away so arranged to meet them to pick up dog on wed morn.m When i got there they weren't there so I rang her and she said they had lost the dog on a walk earlier that morn and so wouldn't be coming. I was annoyed that she hadn't bothered to let me know and i had driven all that way but she was so distraught I ended up reassuring her.

They said they would contact me if they heard anything and my sister said both this girl and her dh were really upset and worried about the puppy so I didn't hassle them by texting for news etc but waited for them to contact me. I heard nothing from them yesterday at all so today I texted at 10.45 to see if they'd heard anything.

She called me back nearly an hour later to say the dog had been found safe at 8.15 this morning and that he was physically fine but obviously traumatised by the last few days. Then she told me that she and her dh wanted to keep him now as they had spent 2 days looking for him and were emotionally attached to him.

Nothing I can say can make her change her mind and I am so angry that they are doing this. My poor dd has spent the last 2 1/2 days crying about the dog and I am sure that the upset of not getting him as expected on wed directly contributed to my ds with AS and ADHD having a meltdown at school yesterday.

We have spent loads of money buying things for him and on petrol travelling to get him on wed but as annoying as that is its irrelevant compared to how heartbroken my children will be. She has ruined their xmas

OP posts:

Joolyjoolyjoo · 21/12/2008 11:10

Agree with kittybrown, the other couple seem to have adopted this dog on a whim, and I wonder how long this energetic young dog will last in their home

I don't think you are BU, dusty. You had an agreement with these people and they broke it. It was obviously something you had put a lot of thought and time into, and all the driving about etc would have been enough to get me mad, especially at this time of year, when there is so much else to do.

Of course you will "get over it" and it won't ruin Christmas, but I think you have every right to be annoyed and upset at how these people behaved. Methinks it might well come back to bite them on the arse (possibly literally !!) Don't waste any more energy getting mad- realx and look forward to being able to choose the absolutely perfect dog for your family.

chocolateteapot · 21/12/2008 11:35

I know Dustystar won't be coming back to this thread but seeing as I'm sitting here I'm sure she won't mind if I update it.

Gracie, I know my DD would be utterly distraught if she thought she was getting a puppy and then found she wasn't, your DCs must be made of sterner stuff then mine. It was never Dustystar's intention to get a dog for Christmas, I think it was about 2 years ago that she first started thinking about getting one and has spent a long long time thinking about whether it would be the right thing for her family. They decided it was some time ago and have been recently approved by a local rescue charity and have been waiting until a suitable dog was found.

She was trying to do the right thing by offering this dog a home as at that point, he had no where else to go. Christmas didn't come into it but obviously in the circumstances it would have been lovely for her DCs to have him there for Christmas but that was completely by the by.

There is however a happy ending to this story. Dusty received a call from the people who had him saying they realise that they had made a mistake and weren't able to offer him the attention he needed as they worked, unlike Dusty who is home all day. They apologised profusely and begged her to have him.

He arrived yesterday and is doing extremely well. The children are behaving brilliantly and understand that he needs a bit of time and space to settle in but he was really excited to meet them and apparently has a really lovely personality and looks like he will make a brilliant family dog. Dusty will have the time needed to make sure he gets the training etc he needs and I'm sure that the dodgy start will soon a distant memory and they will have many happy years together (I so love a happy ending !)

MollieO · 21/12/2008 11:37

Back to OP's point. As a surrogate dog owner (my mum has a dog) I can't imagine taking a puppy I didn't know for a walk and letting it off the lead. Which I assume is the way they lost the puppy. That poor puppy has been traumatised and I would always think it is better for a dog to be in a home where someone is around for the majority of the day rather than where people are out. I work full time, my ds would love a dog but completely unfair and impractical. We'd end up spending £28 a day for a dog walker and the dog would miss us. Hence free access to my mum's one which we can take for walks whenever we want but whom the rest of the time is at home with my retired mum.

Unfortunately without a contract there is little you can do. I also agree with the other posters that you need to meet the dog you think you want before you make a commitment to take it. A springer is a working dog and requires a lot of exercise - two long walks a day. Might be hard work with a young family. Springers are a bit mad too, in a very nice way but they are really hard work and I'd be reluctant to rehome a 7 month one. They need a lot of training and if this hasn't been done then you will have an uphill battle. If you have a lot of experience with dogs you might be okay but if not I'd really think about the commitment you are making.

ThePregnantMerryYuleWitch · 21/12/2008 11:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

MollieO · 21/12/2008 11:43

Wish I'd waited a couple of minutes before writing my missive! At least there is a good result

Joolyjoolyjoo · 21/12/2008 12:01

I did wonder if they would see the error of their ways once the initial excitement at keeping the dog wore off

Think the dog has gone to the right home now. Glad it had a happy ending!

Wallace · 21/12/2008 12:49

Hooray

RaspberryBlower · 21/12/2008 17:08

Good news!

Hulababy · 21/12/2008 17:41

Really glad it had a happy ending.

OP - you were not IMO unreasonabke to be annoyed by the situation. I am really suprised at hoow many posters concidered you to be TBH.

alfiemamagotstuckupthechimney · 21/12/2008 17:43

great news Dusty, bet the kids are over the moon.

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