in feeling obligated to have MIL and BIL over for Xmas but actually not want them to come at all?

[LucyTownsend]

My MIL has no-one else to go to on Xmas day so feel obliged to invite her over, which is fine, except that she has now announced that she is due to work from 11-4 on Xmas day.

On the one hand I feel sorry for her that she has to work on Xmas but it annoys me that it puts our whole day out now.

We had planned a nice morning with just the three of us, MIL and BIL over for lunch at 1.00 and then out to visit friends. At 6 we were going to have FIL and partner over for nibbles etc.

BUT ... if she only comes over at 4.15 we cant eat until then so the visit to friends would be cancelled and nibbles too, as our dd (11 months) goes to bed at 7 ish.

So... AIBU to tell her that she can come over for nibbles etc but that we will be keeping to our day as we originally planned?

I'd stick to my plan, keep he a plate wih food in forwhen she can make it. You'll resent her if you change all your plans.

Keep the day as planned.That is fine.

YANBU. It's the choice of putting one person out (and I do feel sorry for her having to work Christmas Day at such late notice) or at least eight by my calculation.

I think that you should say that you are terribly sorry that she is missing lunch and ask where she would like to slot into your plans for the afternoon.

Good luck!

Patsy

Phew, thats me convinced!

Now to convince DH...