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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder how the hell people keep their homes clean?

134 replies

NoGoodAtCleaning · 13/12/2008 12:28

DP and I both work full time and have an 8mo. When I'm off work I want to spend the time with my baby, and my DP.

So the cleaning is getting behind and I'm really down about it. I'm sick of being embarressed of our home. And I'm sick of having to allocate days where I gut the whole house because the mess has built up.

Everyone else's houses are clean! My friend just had a baby and hers is spotless.

I just want to cry about it.

How do people do it?

OP posts:
MadamePlatypus · 17/12/2008 00:24

I think that if all your time at home is spent with young children around its difficult to spend time doing proper 'cleaning' (e.g. ovens, windows, completely spotless floors) as opposed to basics like tidying and cranking the laundry/food/dishes through the system. Your options are employ a cleaner, split childcare and cleaning between you and your partner on days off, or be proud of your proficiency with playdough and put shiny windows on the back burner for a few years.

MrsMerryHenry · 17/12/2008 00:27

I agree, Madame - I think the OP is right to give her children more attention when she's with them. She'll only have that time with them once.

Anna8888 · 17/12/2008 08:14

I prefer the pay a window-cleaner option and the self-cleaning by pyrolisis oven-cleaning option

OptimistS · 17/12/2008 09:12

This is going to be a completely flippant, unhelpful post, but I couldn't resist, sorry.

My answer is ditch the DH. I have 2-year-old twins and work FT. When I was with my ex, my house was either always a pit, or I spent time I should have been spending with the DC cleaning. When I left him, despite the mess generated by 2 small people, my house was amazingly so much tidier!!!!

On a more serious note, I think the lesson to be learned from this is: an 8 month old doesn't actually generate that much mess (apart from washing), which suggests that your DH is making quite a lot of it but not clearing up after himself. Get him on board.

Also agree with other posters who say clear up as you go along and do small 2-minute jobs as you see them, then you're rarely in the situation where you require an all-day blitz.

At at the end of the day remember that when you die, no one will remember you for how clean your house is; they will remember you for your personality, what you were like as a friend and mother, etc. Speaking as someone who is very clean and tidy (to the point one of my friends jokingly suggests I have OCD) I don't see other people's houses when I visit them as I am there to see them. Life is too short to worry about dog hair floating around the floor (I tend to scoop it up and pop it in the bin so I can delay vacuuming).

OptimistS · 17/12/2008 09:19

Thought I'd had a helpful tip for book lovers I picked up from a Homes and Garden magazine I flicked through at the dentist. Put shelves up at picture rail height to store all your books. They're still on display but only accessible to grown ups.

OptimistS · 17/12/2008 09:20

add istead of had.

Caz10 · 17/12/2008 19:52

MadamePlatypus I know, it is the only good point of my job! . That is 5.30 home from a 5.25 finish too! If it wasn't for the work in the evenings I think I'd be ok, but as it is my "free" time is sucked up by work...but at least I do get the precious 5.30-7.30 slot with dd.

choosyfloosy · 18/12/2008 00:53

I think it's quite possible that people will remember the state of my house after I'm dead, as it's so bad that it's one of the things people mention when asked to describe me. My circumstances aren't that easy, but sound easier than yours OP, and there's no doubt at all that the reason my house is a tip is that I am pretty lazy and would rather do virtually anything than tidy or clean. Hence, my suggestion would be to get a cleaner twice a week. Does your DH really think it is your job? Sounds like you do too, somewhere in your mind. It's not. Make sure you don't end up paying for the whole cost.

I am still mystified by how other people do it, but get the occasional insight, usually from staying with people who are routinely clean. Like my cousin who mops the kitchen and dining room floor (properly, with chairs up and everything) after every meal. I did feel a bit uncomfortable in her house - there seemed to be nothing in it, and no books anywhere, although she is much more intellectual than me.

BonzoDoodah · 21/12/2008 23:57

LOL at mrstumnus ... you didn't happen to find the poem one page back on this thread when I posted it did you?

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