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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have had a go at DD?

79 replies

GrandmasSoup · 04/12/2008 12:21

My DD has been away for the week. My sister took her to CentreParcs with her own DD of the same age.

Anyway I was sorting through her bag last night and she has brought home a load of USED santitary towels! I was livid and asked why she would do that and she got all defensive and said she didn't know where else to put them.

Am I being too hard on her?

OP posts:
PenelopePitstops · 04/12/2008 12:23

yes, she probably didn't know where to put them

poor girl

likessleep · 04/12/2008 12:23

Has this happened before? I think maybe you are being a little mean, she may have been really worried and didn't want to say anything or know what to do away from home.
Maybe talk to her about it and explain why unhygienic.
I think if it is first time, YABU, sorry!

Pinkjennybellrock · 04/12/2008 12:24

Aw bless her, she was probably too embarrassed to leave them anywhere.

quickdrawmcgraw · 04/12/2008 12:25

Well, she obviously only brought them home because she didn't want to be embarassed by leaving them in the bin where her friend might have seen them.
BUT if she's old enough to be having periods then she should be old enough to unpack her own bag especially if she knew the towels were there.

notnowbernard · 04/12/2008 12:25

Er, yes!

You ought to be finding out why she felt she needed to bring them home with her. HAve you talked to her before about how to dispose of them and how to manage herself generally when she has her period?

She was probably embarassed about it, being on holiday with other people and everything

And is probably even more mortified now that you'e 'livid' with her

Go and say sorry to her

BellsCarolsNSleighs · 04/12/2008 12:27

Make sure you have some nappy sacks about for when she goes away next time.. and just tell her if she's not sure can she bag them up.. for hygene reasons. or tell her how to dispose in didferent situations

other than that.. poor girl if she was worried.

onthewarpath · 04/12/2008 12:28

same as *Pinkjennybellrock"

Original poster
GrandmasSoup · 04/12/2008 12:28

She's 13, started periods when she was 12. It is the first time she has done it but they were wrapped up in tissue etc. Disgusting. I told my sister and my mum and they said they'd be livid too.

OP posts:
IllegallyBrunette · 04/12/2008 12:29

I don't think i'd angry with dd, although I would remind her that it wasn't terribly hygenic and then tell he what she could have done with them.

OrmIrian · 04/12/2008 12:29

Yes you are.

Its the kind of stupid thing I'd have done at that age. She probably didn't know where to put them, knows they shouldn't go down the toilet, was too embarrassed to ask and brought them home for want of anything else to do with them. Then you had a got at her. Poor kid

notnowbernard · 04/12/2008 12:29

Why are you asking on here as well then? Your opinion has been validated by your Mum and SIL

IllegallyBrunette · 04/12/2008 12:29

Shame she didn't feel she could ask your sister what to do with them really.

cheeseandsproutssarnie · 04/12/2008 12:30

yes you are being too hard on her.maybe he was embarrassed,maybe she didnt know where to put them.maybe its your job to teach her its ok!

also it isnt the end of the world-so why be 'livid'?its ok.

Original poster
GrandmasSoup · 04/12/2008 12:31

because I still feel a bit guilty. She went to school upset saying I always tell everyone about everything she does. If she didn't do such daft things, I wouldn't need to.

OP posts:
Twims · 04/12/2008 12:31

She's 13 FGS!!! Leave her alone - she's probably mortified as it is without you broadcasting this to the internet and also to family members

likessleep · 04/12/2008 12:31

It is disgusting, but these things are so embarrassing when you're 12, that the fear of looking silly is far worse than the hygiene factor.

Plus, I bet she didn't particularly like not getting rid of them herself.

I'd just explain to her why they shouldn't be kept and agree with bellscarols, explain how to dispose in different situations.

It was so difficult being a teenager (if my memory goes back that far ).

TheProvincialLady · 04/12/2008 12:31

Poor girl It is so hard when you are that age and don't know what the best thing is to do. I used to sit in bloody pants all day because I was too embarrassed to change them at a relative's house.

Why the hell would you tell your sister and your mother? Does this poor child have no dignity? No wonder she was too embarrassed to put her sanitary towels in the bin, you have probably made her feel like the dirtiest creature alive.

cheeseandsproutssarnie · 04/12/2008 12:31

why is it disgusting.why are you,your mum and your sister livid?its not dirty.

IdrisTheDragon · 04/12/2008 12:31

I could imagine me having done a similar thing at the same age. I feel sorry for your DD .

notnowbernard · 04/12/2008 12:31

Are you on a wind up?

bozza · 04/12/2008 12:31

I think you are being hard on her. If they were all wrapped up in tissue etc, she wasn't doing it out of laziness. It would have been worse if she had put them down the toilet at Centreparcs and blocked it. Bit mean telling all the family too. Agree though with whoever said she should be dealing with her own bag.

IllegallyBrunette · 04/12/2008 12:32

Well she has a point about you telling people what she does, because you told your sister and your mum, when really there was no need.

likessleep · 04/12/2008 12:32

Why did you tell your mum and sister?

IdrisTheDragon · 04/12/2008 12:32

And also it's not the most disgusting thing in the world. It's only some menstrual blood.

cheeseandsproutssarnie · 04/12/2008 12:33

take a look at gradmasoups posting history.oh shock horror.troll or idiot?