to be fed up about never having any money even though DH earns (just) over £100k?

[MakemineaGandT]

I know it sounds like a lot, but with a big mortgage and all the other usual bills we have very little disposable cash.

We don't have a cleaner or any other kind of help

Neither of us has had any new clothes for at least 18 months

We spend £100 a week on groceries, so hardly extravagant

We haven't been on holiday for 3 years

We do all DIY etc ourselves

We've been out twice this YEAR

I just don't know how we can cut back. It feels as though we are working so hard and yet we are always struggling.

It makes me really annoyed when I see comments (for example on that taxing over £150k thread) about the "super rich") - I guess on paper we look "rich" but it certainly doesn't feel like it!

G&T - do you have a lot of debt not including your mortgage? do you pay for private health care? have lots of big expensive cars to run? have expensive membership to a country club or something?

can I just check.
Are we including wine in the groceries...

no nappyaddict, none of those things. We really do have a very basic lifestyle. That's what prompted my op

[wishes hadn't started this emoticon]

perhaps some gin and tonic (sorry couldnt resist)

Rhubarb - I have noticed a lot of threads which seem to be duplicated or re-posted.

probably NBU to be fed up about never having any money, but pretty U not to be ABLE to have any money when your DH earns that much.

We have a combined income of less than a third of that and we manage.

there's a lot of bitterness on this thread.

Yes people live on a lot less and they struggle.

But just because the op's dh happens to earn a decent salary doesn't make her frustrations any less valid.

Yes her dh earns decent money, more money than a lot do on here. But from the sounds of it they have made some unwise financial decisions and now they are having to live with the consequences of those decisions. We all make mistakes. But in the current financial climate the op is not in a position to fix her's.

The op isn't complaining that she can't afford champagne for lunch or to pay her school fees, she's saying she hasn't even been able to afford to buy clothes. So clearly something has gone financially wrong for someone earning that kind of salary to have ended up in that kind of situation.

Or should she not be allowed to have made a bad financial judgement just because her dh happens to earn a good salary.

have you looked on uswitch to check you are with the cheapest energy providers?

NC
I really meant no harm
Honestly

If i were you I'd ditch the house but I'm well known for a lack of resolve and backbone

you could always rent your house out and then rent somewhere cheaper and smaller to free up some cash - it just depends whether you value your house and your [huge] mortgage over the disposable income...

not wanting to rile people but a very very large mortgage of say 5 or 6 times income multiples can eat huge quantities of income

we have done this

no school fees
no private healthcare
no flash cars
no holidays

i still buy 'value' and love my house but know that it will be a long while before we are comfortable but i dont mind

I agree Ronnie

I would sell the house - EVERYONE is making a loss, so selling wouldn't be a disaster IMO - if you are buying and selling then does it make a massive difference whether the market is up or down?

wannabe - you are right about showing some compassion and recognising that even people with high incomes make unwise financial decisions.

But I think there's some fairly obvious areas where the OP's perspective is, shall we say, less than realistic.

Saddled with a crippling mortgage: OK, you've little choice than to pay it, or sell up.

Claiming that it costs £100 to feed a family of 4 for a week: needs to try living in the real world.

You obviously are living in a house with a mortgage you cannot afford. Sorry!

Genuine question to those of you who are shocked at spending £100 a week on groceries for a family of four - can you give me an example of your dinner menu for the week?

The house on Interest only is the same as rent on a small place round here so I would be no better off in the short term and, in the long term, I can either earn more and pay the full mortgage or wait till the dc leave home and downsize to pay off the outstanding mortgage.

Oh and I am well known for my bloody mindedness - I have decided this is what the dc need so they will bloody well have it

Sorry for flying off

it would be a disaster though mp if the op doesn't have equity.

The days of 100% mortgages are long gone and it's hard to find a mortgage now without a minimum of 5% or even 10% deposit.

Starlight it's very easy to borrow beyond your means. a £500000 mortgage would cost an awful lot of money. Probably about £3000 a month or even more. If you're then running two cars that's probably another several hundred (I don't own a car so now sure about exact figures) but wouldn't leave that much after all other bills (huge mortgage probably also equals huge council tax bill).

It really is that easy to fall into a trap like that.

At the minute I'm having to decide between heating or eating.

Am very sorry to say, I don't have a huge ammount of sympathy. I have a lot less than a tenth of you household income every year, and I'm seemingly 'managing' to get by with a 17 month old child to feed, clothe and take care of.

I have also just moved and had to furnish/decorate an entire flat, and I've still managed to do most of my Christmas shopping. I will also, just manage to pay all of my bills this month providing I spend money on nothing but my bills.

I'm sat here feckin freezing with 9 layers on but at least dd is warm in her bed with a full tummy.

100k did you say.......?

I always say it's not what you earn it's what you spend it on that's the problem.
The best fiver any of you could spend would be on a book called rich dad, poor dad.
In a nut shell, it teaches you about assets and liabilities and the jist is your house is a liability not an asset, once you get your head around that you'll start making instead of spending money.
Give me a £100k a year and I will be off on 3 holidays a year !

G&T get your self over to the forums on www.moneysavingexpert.com and join in the Debtfreewanabe board.

Wannabe that was a brilliant post.

nc

Yep. We have a family of 5, btw

MON: fish in breadcrumbs, jacket potatoes, veg.
TUE: pasta bake with homemade tomato & roasted pepper sauce
WED: egg, potato wedges, beans.
THUR: cottage pie
FRI: macaroni & cauliflower cheese with tomatoes on top, and peas.
SAT: homemade veg soup, jacket pots & houmous
SUN: pork tenderloin done in slow cooker with leeks & apricots, mashed potatoes & veg. Syrup sponge & custard.

sounds yum

nicer than all this caviar I have every night

Am impressed anyone can spend £100 a week on food for 4.
My lot have hoovered up over £40 tonight alone, fruit, yoghurts, dinner (tuna pasta bake, garlic bread, apple juice), half a loaf of bread and 2 pints of milk. They are 4,6 and 8 + DH. Am dreading the teenage years when they really eat.

Am impressed anyone can spend £100 a week on food for 4.
My lot have hoovered up over £40 tonight alone, fruit, yoghurts, dinner (tuna pasta bake, garlic bread, apple juice), half a loaf of bread and 2 pints of milk. They are 4,6 and 8 + DH. Am dreading the teenage years when they really eat.