to find the number of people who hate their MILs rather depressing (yes I have a DS, how did you guess)

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My little boy's only 15mo at the moment but the more time I spend on MN, the more depressed I get at the thought of any potential daughter-in-law hating me!

Obv most of the people on here who complain about their MILs have very good reason to do so - there are some horror stories out there, and I sympathise. But I also see a lot of "he's MY family now, she needs to get over it and keep her nose out" type comments, which always make me cringe a bit.

I can't help thinking that if a man said such a thing to his wife's mother, all hell would break loose and he would be accused of being toxic, controlling etc etc.

So - is it really different for mothers of boys? Can you really have a good relationship with a DIL without her secretly thinking you're a sad interfering old witch who just wants to get her claws on the grandkids?

I rather like my MIL. Sadly, she's not at all fond of me . She thinks that if I hadn't come along, her dd would be married to a rich dentist, and the two of them could spend their days happily complaining about the many dreadfulnesses of men. I really spoiled her fun. Still hoping that one day she will forgive me for existing...

Ohhh I like this thread, we have 3 boys, I plan to be a lovely MIL but often think it is impossible after being on MN

I really quite like my MIL... and that's pretty good going. She finds me a bit 'weird' but we get on pretty well.

she could offer to babysit though, or looking after the DCs once. hummph

My FIL pn the otherhand is a f#';#'ing racist bigot but luckily they are divorced and we never have to see him

I hate all the constant MIL-is-the-MIL-from-hell threads too. I do have two DSs, and I hate thought that one day my DILs will be whinging and moaning like so many do on here.

In the real world, my parents got on great with the MILs, and I love my MIL, and I hope that my DSs (have 2) will pick lovely women who do appreciate their MIL.

I think people like complaining, makes a great story and we all love to whinge and moan....

(My MIL, when DS1 was 8 months old, told me that one day he will break my heart....)

YA so NBU.

it is worth pointing out that sometimes it is not the mum's fault - sometimes you can get the "DIL from hell" as well, who is of course also the SIL from hell.

Although my SIL was not exactly from hell (before she shat all over my bro from a great height, that is, of course she is now) she was a very difficult character and despite my mum bending over backwards to make things smooth between them, she still managed to make it all unpleasant.

I liked my MIL, unfortunately she passed away and I don' get on with my SMIL,

oh yes forgot to say and for you needmorecoffee - what an unfeeling bitch!
When my mum lost her 2nd baby, she was told by her MIL that it was due to her "bad blood" - feck knows what she meant by that, it was something MIL and SIL had hatched between them.

I'm in the LOVE MY MIL brigade.

She is who I aspire to be when DS is an adult.

I love my IL's - don't know where i'd be without them!

Needmorecoffee - Your MIL is an arse!

My MIL is quite nice most of the time, but my 2 SILs really dislike me (and my DH) and I think they manipulate my MIL quite a lot, as she sometimes goes a bit funny with us.

I love my MIL, but as the mother of 2 boys I get very depressed reading all the MIL threads. I am planning to have a very busy retirement so that I can't get on any DILs nerves.

Just had to say that needmorecoffee, your MIL is surely one of the worst MILs ever!!

Also, I just wanted to add that although YANBU to feel depressed at the negative MIL threads (as per my previous post), I do think they serve a valuable purpose. If I couldn't offload occasionally over my MIL, I think I would get more stressed in RL. I do believe it's important for me to maintain a decent relationship with her for the sake of my DS and any future sprogs (and DH, but he doesn't really get on with her either) so being able to moan about her nastier comments/actions on here helps me to keep calm. That's really important!!