to be shell shocked by birthday party with 6 invited 8 year olds?

[jasper]

I have 3 primary school aged kids and have a relaxed view of parenting so am used to considering my kids might well come across as not the most disciplined in the world.

Last night dd (8) had a party at our house with 6 invited classmates.

IT WAS CHAOS!

from the moment they arrived the 6 guests wreaked havvoc, shrieking and yelling, banging the piano lid ( repeatedly being asked not to)and generally behaving in a very bold and loud manner.

One boy just roared at the top of his voice for 2 hours.The rest were not much better.

Within a few min of arriving one little girl went round all the balloons bursting them with a sharp pencil.

I would be mortified if I thought my kids did this in other folks' houses.Maybe thay do???

As I mentioned I thought my own standards were not that high , but this behaviour is not acceptable in our house - far from it.

Anyway is this normal behaviour when a bunch of 8 year olds get together?

In my parenting life I have so far hosted over 18 parties with many many more years of them to come. I have NEVER experienced anything thing like you have.

it is NOT, repeat NOT normal.

Any kids who behaved like that in my home would be sent home.

squilly - the simple fact that they have space to run around will make it better. TBH space, lots of balloons, music... will keep them occupied for a while.

OMG, it sounds awful. My DD is only 10 months but I have made the decision to never have her bday parties at home, based on this thread.

I also think it's not normal. We have 3 children's parties a year, many at home, most with over 20 guests. Including various children who do have acknowledged behavioural problems.

And I have never hosted or even been to a party anything like as bad as those desribed here. In the vast majority of cases the over 6s behave well, give or take the odd tearful child or an off-stage tantrum, or a child who can't calm down who is taken aside for a bit.

Gulp. I think it could go either way. I'm quite strict by nature, but its harder when there are a lot of them. It will be just me and dh co-ordinating - I can't really ask anyone else to help, most of the parents I don't know very well and the one who would be most help (primary school teacher!) has two other children.
I have met all the children though. I can imagine one or two of them might be awkwardlittlesods a bit argumentative! suspect my own ds2 has the capacity to put a spanner in the works too.

The idea is to split them into teams and dh and I to each take one team around a variety of games/tasks. That way we mainly have only 4 to deal with at once.

Definitely ask a parent or two to stay and help - or rope in a friend. Lots of parents want to stay but are worried they won't be wanted. And the one with 2 others might be fine with staying anyway.

Ahh the good old stress test, home parties . They are all bound to be over excited but there are limits especially when they are older. I have never gotten over party shock but character building, I can do anything now....Difficult because we want them to have fun and not have to be boring mini adults but at the same time not trash entire buliding and our sanity and have respect for belongings etc. I had to remove all breakables last time, bloody good job, but refuse to pay overinflated prices for lots of children to go to an event, roll on the days its a couple of friends to the cinema and pizza after !!!!!

I just don't feel i can - ds1 has only been at this school since June, so the 4 new friends who are coming, I hardly know the parents of. And feel a bit inhibited that they might see me in boot camp mode! (I think they are all softer than me...) I kind of feel it might be better if they just let me get on with it...

OK, I think I'm going to put No Entry signs on most of the rooms...

Strip house of precious breakable belongings and light rugs ( speaking from experience with both my DS) and keep them occupied some of the time and it be fine. Just have the wine ready for when the last one goes.... never ever more than 2 hrs EVER

Elliott 4:1 sounds fine and I understand the reservations about asking a parent you don't know well to stay, but could you rope in a friend/relation to manage the food - otherwise it will be 8:1 while one of you does it...?

I begin to see why we don't mind home parties as much as some. Our house is already stripped of light furnishings, breakables and nice furniture. It's pre-trashed. Parties can hardly dent it.

1. Never cope alone if you can help it 2. Make sure all parents know pick up time,

theres always the odd mickey taker believe you me 3. house stripped 4. Persuade them into garden. It be fine just feed them and break up the odd spat, 2 hrs flies by Note - After my last one I think 1 half hours blooming well the limit. Enjoy and dont stress, soon they will be teenagers and hate us all and NEVER even be up out of bed on their birthday....

No relatives near by. I think one mum might want to stay - if she does I will busy her with the food. I am a bit worried about managing that - plan to have it all laid out before they arrive and just whip off cling film etc at lunch time. And to lock the cats out

Luckily we have recently moved and our huge living room has no furniture in it at the moment - ideal party room!

I've done on my own before, fine as long as food already laid out you can do games etc, always a juggle bringing in cake and trying to take a photo and film the blowing candle bit. Octopus Mum mode
Sad I know but Ive taken a photo of both my DS with cake before party as it bit hectic to get it all done and its my back up incase it is to hectic during party

Well, just thought I would report back to say we survived!
It was actually less hard work (althouh a lot more time consuming in advance planning) than previous bigger parties in sports centre venues - fewer people, no adults to have to make small talk to. just me and dh free to lay down the law facilitate...
We organised and structured them to within an inch of their lives with lots of games. The team competition idea worked well. We only once or twice had to raise our voices above theirs
I even got one or two thank yous at the meal. And it was quite endearing when they spontaneously started singing their christmas show songs!

the only thing that didn't work so well was our arrival activity - didn't keep them occupied for long enough, so most had finished before some had even arrived and obviously they were really hyper at this stage. So we really needed something flexible and either very absorbing or physical to channel them in to at this point. I think the 'graffiti wall art' idea might work better (omg I'm starting to plan next year's already...)