To dislike my show off niece?

[complicated]

I really dislike my neice. She's 14 and such a show off attention seeker. She drives me mad.

They all came down last night and the idea was that they help me decorate as I've not been feeling up to it at all.

So we go in the bedroom and neice offers to mix paint up and create a unique colour. I said "best not as we won't be able to match it properly later on if we need more paint" so she said "I'll make enough for the full room" so I allowed her to do it.

A while later she comes running downstairs saying she's finished mixing it. So we go up to look and to be fair, it was a really nice colour and I thanked her and we started painting the walls with it.

So whilst up the ladders she started going on about her art class at school, and then about the GCSE she wants to do in art, and then the college course she wants to do it art ... I just nod politely and told her to go for it as she's clearly good at art. So she started rabbiting on about all these supposedly famous painters knowing full well I've never heard of them and so I changed the subject.

She just gets on my nerves. Everytime she speaks she shows off. She's always trying to make people laugh, always butting into conversations, always needs to be centre of attention.

I was supposed to be going to my sister's today and when I phoned this morning she said "DD is off school but it's still ok for you to come" and so I just said "actually, I'm not feeling too well, I'll leave it".

So she said "is that because DD is off school? has she done something to upset you?" and I know I'm probably been a bit mean but she drives me mad. If I did go today the whole day would be about "her".

And I love the time and effort she took with her younger cousin to turn him into a 'emo'

she is 14, and the world revolves around her, as it did to us when WE were 14.

she sounds just like MY 14yr old DD, and your know what.....far rather a 14yo who is as bouncy and enthusiastic as her than a morose grumpy one who glares and sulks.

You sound absolutely horrible! She sounds a lovely, lively teenager. She HELPS you when you are ill, tells you about her life and ambitions, plays with your son (pencil could have gone in his eye FFS!) at an age when lots of kids ignore younger ones. Actually, what you sound is painfully jealous. I think YOU want to be the centre of everyone's world, and are envious of this young girl with her whole life in front of her. Why shouldn't she talk about EastEnders? It's insane to think she shouldn't.

You should of seen what I used to do to my little cousin when he was 8 and and I was 15 he got make up put on him. I would teach him how to rap lol we used to playfight as well and have great fun.

He now is 16 and happily walks upto me on the street in front of his friends and give me a hug tells me he loves me etc such a sweet boy

Maybe spend a bit of one on one time with her...

I have a 14 YO neice too and they can be...well....14

There is obviously something else going on here. Were you very close to your sister (neice's mum...?) growing up? Have you ever been close to your neice?

How does she know you don't know about all these famous painters she was on about? She may still think you're her all-knowing aunt and would already know this stuff that she's now learning.

She seems to want your approval and okay is going over the top a bit. But teenagers are still learning social skills, and it's up to us to guide them. Not ignore or avoid them.

She gave up her time to help you decorate.
She cared enough to mix the paint to a nice shade.
She gave your ds her time and attention to the point of dressing him up to suit her ideas.

You don't know how lucky you are with her.

i bet your ds loved being done up as an emo - that's exactly what older girl cousins are for. sounds like you're a bit jealous of her artistic talents and social ease. try enjoying her enthusiasm, and be glad she's practicing being a grown-up young woman - conversational skills, helping out with painting, being sweet with little cousin etc. - with you, her aunty.

Sorry yabu. Simply sounds like she is desperate to be part of the "grown up" jet set.

BTW, she came to help you paint YOUR walls, and it is all about her?????

Honestly, something else must be going on here!!

I'm not jealous of her, she gets on my nerves.

I didn't ask her to paint the house, it was her mum that was supposed to be doing it but yet again, she had to be in on it and tag along before proceeding to totally take over.

I know she's had a lot going on in her young life and I do feel for her but she's always been like this, maybe it's just my current mood but I just can't be doing with her.

she sounds like my neice. she's older now but still as annoying

Her enthusiasm for life should be encouraged, not sneered at.

Teenagera can be a bit full of themselves, but equally can suffer from depression and low self esteem. I know which I would rather my dd be.

You have also given her mum the impression she has done something wrong, I hope it has not caused any trouble between them.

Sorry, but you sound immature and possibly a bit jealous of her.

wow - like. get over yourself.
You are jealous.
She is clearly a bright, interested girl. she knows about things you don't
You resent her for this.

what will you do when your DC are 14 and like this???

you will be proud of them and think they are wonderful, and be extremely hurt if anyone felt like this about your own children.

or do you want them to grow up and be grumpy and glare at their aunt???

Has this something to do with your trip to America and the problems you are having with your partner?

she mixed a paint colour and painted your room at 14 and you can't stand her?????????

you clearly have very little experience of truly annoying people

you sound utterly jealous I am afraid to say. And she sounds fab.

complicated, are you the youngest child?

also i think it's class that this kid has such confidence and enthusiasm that she has no problem portraying herself as a happy person and wants to interact with adults.

Next time I suggest you do your own decorating, if you can't be suitably appreciative.

I think she's just being a teenager.

They can be quite annoying.

I sometimes wish my teenage step daughter would just grow up because her 'over-enthusiasm', 'way off the mark opinions' & 'text speak' drive me up the wall.

But then I remember being a teen myself...and everything was "well wicked" and people were "sussed"

She's just being a teen. Remind yourself that you are the adult regularly & rise above it, take the higher ground, and support her through this stage.

In just a few years she will calm down and be more aware of herself socially.

I wish I had been that confident when I was 14, I would have just mumbled and been very shy.

FWIW I loved art at the age and would have just assumed that everyone knew about famous artists. Perhaps she could come round to my gaff as I need my living room decorated?

Is something else going on that's making you super-sensitive to her? You sound quite disproportionately irritated by her actions.

Are you wanting time with your sister to talk about something but not getting chance to?

You do sound jealous of your nieces relationship with her mother, Did you want your sister to yourself.

YASBVU and very mean.

If you have other personal problems then face them don't put it on your niece

I think she sounds great, bright and confident, it's such a shame you're so negative about her, you do come across as a bit threatened by her confidence maybe?