To dislike people who tell me my DCs should not be scared of their dog?

[onthewarpath]

It is now happening pretty much every time we go to a park.
One of the best one was the one who said (not letting go of her mobile conversation) that I should "just ignore" her boxer dog barking at me. At the time I hade one Dc in pushchair and another one screaming with fear on my shoulders. Did not manage to ignore and shouted at her . AIBU? Several similar incident before/since and I am always made to feel in the wrong by dog owners.

Can I come ?

totally agree, NBNC.
My SIL recently asked if her son (1 yr) could ride on my dogs back. She was not impressed when I said that I didn't think it was a clever way to teach children to behave towards animals. I do not allow my kids to go up to strange dogs for their own safety, too. However I also teach all children that the more noise they make the more they wil frighten any animal. Dogs are not toys and should be treated with respect. AS should children.

totally agree, NBNC.
My SIL recently asked if her son (1 yr) could ride on my dogs back. She was not impressed when I said that I didn't think it was a clever way to teach children to behave towards animals. I do not allow my kids to go up to strange dogs for their own safety, too. However I also teach all children that the more noise they make the more they wil frighten any animal. Dogs are not toys and should be treated with respect. AS should children.

When I mentionned children jumping on dogs, I never imagined it could actually happen. It was to illustrate my rant. Let alone letting a 1yr old having a ride on one.

I forgot to tell you the one when my DH was carying our 18mth old DD while supervising the othe DCS in the park.
Dog comes near DH, starts to bark maddly at him.
DH ask dog owner to call dog back.
Owner tell DH off for carrying DD as her dog is jalous, hence the mad barking...

Really there are days when I could not care less about dog psychology...

The dog is jealous Sounds like another dog owner who trests their dog like a baby. Mind you, I did until I had a child myself

Anna8888 said:
"It is quite, quite normal and healthy for a small child to be frightened of dogs who they do not know. Dog owners who protest otherwise are unreasonable."

I'm not a dog owner, but I would have to disagree with this - or rather re-word it.

It is quite, quite normal and sensible for a small child to be CAUTIOUS of dogs who they do not know......"

Any 'unknown' can be worrying, and there may indeed be risks, but fear undermines the ability to assess those risks calmly and take the appropriate action.

If we teach our children that 'unknown' always equals danger then we run the risk of having children who are afraid to explore the unknown. Better to teach them that there are risks and dangers in life, but if you are sensible, you can identify many of those dangers, see how great or small the actual danger is, and act accordingly.

sunnygirl.

''The idea that dogs absolutely must have off-lead exercise is a bit of a fallacy: ''

Whilst I agree with the rest of your post NBNC - I must take issue with this statement. It would be simply cruel to own a springer spaniel, labrador or any medium to large dog and not let it run off lead. But then I would also say that people shouldn't own such breeds if they live in 'town' and have only parks in which to exercise their dogs. Surely there is nothing wrong with letting a dog run free in the woods, open fields etc

Hmm, idlingabout, I have only ever kept re-homed terriers, who despite my best efforts at training (and they were/are quite extensive efforts) were entirely unreliable in their recall. They also had/have a habit of killing things (rabbits, birds etc). So they don't come off the lead. The one I have now is a particularly high energy breed and gets/needs far more exercise than my neighbours springer. (Is a myth that bigger dogs require more exercise than small ones - depends on the breed - this is why lots of people have problem jack russells) If a dog doesn't have rock-solid recall, it shouldn't ever be off a lead. Trouble is, alot of people prioritise the off-lead exercise over the recall, which is why problems occur. I also have a reasonably large garden (for surburbia) and my dog gets lots of running around and chasing time in the garden. I agree that the ideal situation is to be able to exercise dogs in fields and woods off the lead - but only if they are really well trained and you can be sure that they will not chase stock or deer. Stock and deer chasing is a big problem round here. Also, I've seen a springer spaniel end up dead from chasing deer out of a wood onto a dual carriageway. Train or restrain. Or don't keep a dog.

Caution is a measured, mature, adult response to the raw emotion of fear. I don't expect very small children to have acquired that skill (though of course it is great if the adults around him/her explain caution in the face of fear right from the word go).

After much consideration and research, I have worked out the answer to the remark:
"Don't worry, he won't hurt her" as said by a dog owner whose dog is barking in my child's face or touching my child and whose owner is not attempting to control the animal.
It is:
"I'll be the judge of that thank you".

PS, I like dogs, despite the fact that my neighbour's wife deliberately encourages her doberman to rush up and bark at me and my children as "revenge" for having opposed their planning application. When it catches me off-guard, I scream. But when I see it coming, I say "oooh! nice doggie saying hello!".

Am at your neoghbour and the dobermann lingle. I wouldn't be able to tolerate that.

Report to dog warden.

YANBU

I was bitten as a small child so was terrified of dogs, especially yappy ones. It has faded as an adult but have no idea how I'm not going to pass my fears onto my DS.

Thanks Cammelia. She is..... not an educated person.... (there just isn't a nice way to say it) and I think if I reported her it would become a vendetta.

to the OP - YANBU at all!!

I could bnot agree more. I grew up with dogs at home, and I have friends with dogs.

I agree that children should be encouraged to feel comfortable with animals.

However I strongly believe that it is for the owner to highly train their pets and be very respectful about the fears and feelings of other people especially when children are involved.

These days people don't tend to smoke in front of non-smokers or kids so much. So they should also be throughful about how others feel about their dogs.

to the OP - YANBU

However I do have a comment about parents who let their children approach strange dogs.

My DD8, DD6, DS3, DS2 adore dogs. I have repeatedly told them that they always need to check with the owners before approaching dogs. However the younger ones particularly, in their excitement don't always remember, and are are not yet reliable at stopping when I tell them to.

Because there are so many dogs in my local park, I now have to keep my two youngest on reins in the local parks. The only place that I can 'let them off their leads' and play football is in our back garden.

I love dogs and I would say the dog owners in my park are responsible, but young children can be unpredictable and don't always do what they have been told.

I do agree with you smiley that children should not bother dogs. In my case they never have time as dogs always start first. I do not however agree that all dog owners are responsable hence my thread.