daughter being sick at nursery

[unistudent2]

hi, I'm new to this but need some advice! My daughter who is 3 started a new nursery just a month ago part time (2 half days 1 full) as I am studying at uni.Up until recently she has been a happy, confident-sometimes 2 confident! little girl.I have been studying since she was 1,when she had a childminder who she loved and all of her 6 kids! but I felt she'd benefit from nursery recently as she really wants to learn,she attended the nursery on uni campus from last easter until the summer holiday but when I went to take her back in Sept they didnt have a place for her so I found a place at another local nursery.Every time I take her she says shes scared and I ask her why and she says 'I don't like *'(male nursery nurse).Within the last 2 weeks 3 times when I have come to pick her up after lunch they says shes been sick usually 10-15 minutes before I arrive.usually after just having a mouthful and shes in a right state crying.Itry to ask her why and shes in such a state she can't answer and just says 'Idon't know'so I spent 20 minutes talikng to her when she was happy in the bath earlier and she said '** shouts and says if ur silly you'll go in the baby room!' and it scares her plus shes quite independent and thinks of herself 'as a big girl'I think shes getting that nervous its making her physically sick and I'm not happy about it! I've orgasnised a meeting with the manager but am seriously thinking of taking her out and post-poning my studys am I being rash? I just can't stand to think of her scared like that when she's usually so happy and confident,it could scar her for life!

You are right to raise it with the manager, nursery staff should not be shouting at children, or making threats to send them to the baby room. I've worked in nurseries and that sort of thing doesn't happen, staff are far nicer than that - though of course there are always some who aren't.

Give them all your concerns at the meeting, and take it from there.

I was dismayed to read your message and concerned about how you daughter has been treated. This does not sound like a good nursery ( i have been a qualified child care pratitioner in a pre-school for 5 years) and I would find a new one asap. Shouting is absolutely against all current thinking and training and humiliation is not acceptable.
Maybe you should ask to sit in on a session (they should not refuse this) and try to see how your daughter reacts. Of course, staff will be on their best behaviour but you may be able to see her reactions to certain people and situations and what may have triggered her anxieties. If you do this try to just sit in a corner and not to get too involved in whats going on - hopefully she will forget you are there.

Sounds like a really extreme reaction to going to this nursery. So far 3 of my DC have gone through an assortment of nursery's (we've moved a few times) Just one got a similar reaction, must admit I had doubts over one of the women supervisors ( seemed v.cold with the children)DS pleaded not to go, kept trying, but when he started crying every time we went in the car in case we were going to nursery knew we had to change. Sounds like you are sensibly considering the same, wish you luck.
By the way DS loved his new nursery and is back to his over confident self

Take her out of there immediately and try and get another place at a different nursery or a pre-school.

She wont be scarred for life, but its best to try somewhere else

I'd take her out straight away without delay, does your old childminder have any places?

maybe just take some compassionate leave from studies until you have a new place sorted out. you might only need a week

Take her out. There are plenty of alternatives.

I would def take her out as I can't imagine anything the manager said apart from getting rid of the person in question would make me happy enough to leave my dc there given this situation. But agree you don't need to postpone your studies at this stage as you might well be able to find somewhere quickly. Good luck!

Agree with the others. I wouldn't send her back before the meeting and I wouldn't be happy sending her again unless I was sure it wouldn't re-occur.

I wouldn't enter into any discussion with the nursery - I'd remove her asap. Whatever is or isn't going on, it makes her unhappy, and that would do it for me!