to want another?

[memoo]

Bit of background, DP and I have been together for 2 1/2 years. He has 2 DC from first marriage age 5 and 6, I have 2 DC from my first marriage age 7 and 9. We live together and are getting married next year.

I am deperate to have another baby, its all i can think about, DP wants one too but is really worried about the impact on our lives finacially.

I won't work with a baby so we'll lose my wages. Which also means we'll have to sell my car and that basically each month will be a bit of a struggle. We'l just about be able to cover the basics but extras will be out of the window including holidays, although we will be able to go camping, have a big tent etc.

So am i being unreasonable, I'm worried that I am being selfish because we'll be broke. But at least we'll be happy, and thats all that matters at the end of the day right??

why can't you work with a baby? do you mean you won't go back to work or do you mean while your on maternity leave?

Would give up work completely because I don't want to leave my baby with someone else, if I have one then I want to be able to be at home to care for it myself. It is what I did with first DC until they started school.

well if you both want one then go for it
Although you'll probaby want another one after that as you'll want 2 close in age like your other four. So you'll end up with 6

crikey, we'll be like the waltons

do his children all lve with you too???

I think it would be lovely to have another. is brings the children together in an even more special way too as all four will then be connected thro the new baby.

and maybe you will be a little bit shorter on cash, but think how much richer it will make your family.

altho, I have five, so I am pretty biased!

His Dc live with their mum but spend every weekend and some week nights here.

""I think it would be lovely to have another. is brings the children together in an even more special way too as all four will then be connected thro the new baby.""

Thats lovely psycho, my sentiments exactly

Dh and I have a 6yr dd each- his 6 yr old lives with her mum but spends weekends and the odd weeknight with us.

We've got a DC due in Feb and it feels like it's really pulling us together as a family. The dd's are really excited.

I don't blame you for wanting one together at all, I have for ages!

(and I want another one after this one!)

Can you not come to a compromise with your DH and maybe go back to work part time once you feel ready? maybe if you sit down together and work out all the options and your finances you might be able to come up with a solution to suit you all.

Vinegartits- I love your MN name, and your halloween one is fantastic!

Thanks MS! i didnt make it to the halloween shortlist though

Do you all actually want another child in the family? If so, go for it! If your partner isn't as keen, or if it's a baby you want rather than another CHILD, then it's a different matter! But if you all agree you want another child, and you don't feel able to work, then surely having less money is something you'll just accept as part and parcel?
It's only selfish if it's something you want and your partner doesnt

oh do it! You won't take memories of your bank statements with ya!

memoo......sounds like you are keen, so I say go for it.