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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be upset over DD's haircut even though i know it could have been worse?

24 replies

HRHSaintMamazon · 21/10/2008 22:19

DD and Ds decided to give dd a haircut yesterday thread here

I took her to the hairdresser today to try and see what she could do to save her hair.

She has now got a bob that just about skims her shoulders.
She lokos lovely and it really suits her, it makes her look older (she is 4)it will be easier to manage and will probably do her hair a lot of good.

but her hair was long enough it went past her bum
every time i look at her i feel sad.

i know it could have been a lot worse, my freinds daughter ended up with a mullet after her gamne of hairdressers.

but AWWW her lovely lovely hair.

every time Ds see's me looking sadly at her head he says "its only hair mum, it does grow" to which i reply "yes, and if i ever see you with a pair of scissors again, you wont!"

OP posts:

Original poster

HRHSaintMamazon · 21/10/2008 22:43

oi! come and tell me that its ok to be unreasonably upset at her lost hair

OP posts:

soultaken · 21/10/2008 22:48

my best friends 4 year old daughter has severe cp and will never talk, walk or toilet herself.

your dds hair will grow back.

paddingtonbear1 · 21/10/2008 22:48

awww I feel your pain, not unreasonable to be upset. dd used to have very long hair too, we went to my hairdressers, the girl made a balls up of cutting it - honestly she cut chunks out! we had to have it done again, she ended up with shoulder length hair. It is longer again now and we've never darkened that hairdressers door again! (she messed up my hair too and had to fix it).

shelleylou · 21/10/2008 22:48

oh no!!! nothing worse than dc having a haircut you dont want. If your BU i am bout ds's being cut by xp

kitbit · 21/10/2008 22:49

It is reasonable of course, you weren't quite ready to cut it!
If it makes you feel better - 2 weeks before ds's 1st birthday dh said he thought his hair looked as though he'd been attacked by nesting birds (fair comment, it did) and we should have it cut for his birthday. It didn't happen and it didn't happen...so dh picked up the kitchen scissors on a whim and cut his fringe. I was going to yell at him to stop but we'd been having a few heated discussions on me being too controlling over ds (fair comment, I was!) so I bit my tongue.

10 mins later dh had gathered up ds and was legging it down to the local barber in order to plead with him to save his marriage. ds's first birthday photos show him grinning his head off, looking like blackadder. I am going to give the photos to ds when he comes of age in order to bribe his father into buying him a car.

soultaken · 21/10/2008 22:50

there's plenty of things worse than your dc having a haircut you don't want Shelleylou

Really, in the grand scheme of things, is it something to cry about?

Original poster

HRHSaintMamazon · 21/10/2008 22:51

but im not talking about the grand scheme of things...im taling about the small scheme of my daughter having her beautifull hair cut off

OP posts:

serenity · 21/10/2008 22:52

It's Ok to be upset I'd be gutted, but then again I cried when DD moved whilst I was trimming her hair and I ended up having to lope 3 inches off to even it up.

Definitely could be worse - when DS1 was at Nursery one of the little girls had wonderful waist length, ringletty hair. She hacked so much off the front that she ended up with a 2" crop. She looked very sweet, but it was definitely a shock when she came into school that day.

Ds1 shaved half an eyebrow off a few years ago, but that just made me ROFL

MamaG · 21/10/2008 22:56

soultaken I'm a bit at your post TBH, think it was unecessary

mooog · 21/10/2008 22:57

I read your other thread, I sort of know how you feel. The mother in law had my dd for the weekend a few years ago and decided my dd needed a haircut and instead of phoning me, she took her the hairdressers and got her a short back and side. WHY!!!!!.
My poor little girl,who had hair well past her shoulders, it was mainly blonde but slowly getting a little darker as she was getting older....she was six at the time.... and by the time she got home to me her hair looked like a boys haircut that was not even an inch long at the neck!!!!! It even changed colour to a mousy brown!!! She was so upset, she cried her eyes out when her nan and granded left.
Needless to say I ended up having a massive arguement with the MIL and we never sopke for a long while. Worst or all though,it took a long while for my daughter to be happy with her hair as the layers that were cut in took along time to catch the rest up!! All I wanted was to enjoy the weekend break as I hadn't had a break from a beautiful.....but sometimes very tiring dd.... for over four years. Aaahhhh Well at least I got a good break from the MIL!!!

Aitch · 21/10/2008 22:58

soultaken. you also need some perspective here.

kitbit · 21/10/2008 22:58

soultaken, I think people on this thread probably do have a well balanced sense of perspective when their tongues are out of their cheeks, but this isn't that kind of a thread

soultaken · 21/10/2008 22:59

well I have had a couple of drinks but even when i'm sober I get annoyed at people who get irrationally upset about their dcs haircuts when I know people whose kids will never ever leave their wheelchairs.

Cry when you've got a child like that, not when your dcs hair looks a bit odd temporarily.

shelleylou · 21/10/2008 23:01

i wasnt on about in the grand scheme of things. But if someone else cuts your dc's hair without your knowledge/consent it is upsetting especially when you liked the way it was before. The decision has been taken away from you. Obviously you took what i said and read far to much into it.

Original poster

HRHSaintMamazon · 21/10/2008 23:02

rest assured Soultaken i am fully aware of the far worse things that i could be worrying about.

Ds has ASD. my sister died at only a few hours old due to a heart defect, a freidns 5 year old daughter has just beent old that her latest brain tumour is inoperable and she has a 1% chance of living through the next 12 months.

I am aware, but i am still sad when i see Dd's hair.

OP posts:

kitbit · 21/10/2008 23:02

soultaken yes, there are many sad things around but it is also OK to lighten the mood and share a joke. I don't think you need to stop telling a funny story to your friend on the phone because laughing would be wrong as there's so much sadness elsewhere in the world.

FangolinaJolly · 21/10/2008 23:02

Oh dear!

ds cousin chopped his hair one day when SIL and I thought they were happily cutting and sticking,we were there but engrossed in chatting!

It will grow back

Bobs are lovely,too,much easier to manage.dd has one,as she has sn and HATES having her hair brushed/washed/fiddled with,really hypersensitive!

I once cut her hair,big mistake,and gave her a Dave Hill fringe,so HRH,IT COULD BE WORSE,THE FRINGE WAS DIRE!!!!!!

shelleylou · 21/10/2008 23:03

Sorry Mamazon didnt mean for my first comment to kick the tread off!!!

kormAaaarrrggghhhchameleon · 21/10/2008 23:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mooog · 21/10/2008 23:06

Soultaken: lighten up, we know there are plenty of very sad things in the world but if we only got sad about the really sad things then we would all end up being really sad people...eeerrrrrr......I think!!

soultaken · 21/10/2008 23:06

Sorry to hear about your friends 5 year old.

just feeling a bit drunk and maudling tonight.

Original poster

HRHSaintMamazon · 21/10/2008 23:06

don't worry Shelleylou. I am sure that soultaken was just trying to help me get some perspective.

OP posts:

lou33 · 21/10/2008 23:08

my son is unlikely to ever leave his wheelchair, but i can see why mamazon was upset

FangolinaJolly · 21/10/2008 23:09

Have just read thread...wasn't going on a sn rant... just relating funny story,sorry if any offence

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