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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be a bit brassed off with my company re xmas do...

31 replies

paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:20

They've booked it for the last Friday before xmas, everyone gets the afternoon off and a free meal/drinks. Our company is only 18 people. Only thing is, I don't work on a Friday (I do work every other day), and it's the last day of school term, so school closes early and there's no after school care. The only way I can go to this do is for dh to book the afternoon off work himself.
My work know all this and could have chosen another day, but they haven't. I know am lucky to be able to work 4 days but this has brassed me off a bit, I do try and be flexible when needed and work hard!

OP posts:
DrNortherner · 06/10/2008 10:21

Organising a company do is hard work - you can not please everyone, plus I think changing the date just for you is a bit much when there are 17 other people to consider.

Why don't you take the monday off that week instead?

wannaBe · 06/10/2008 10:23

agree with drn - it is a bit of a cheak expecting them to organize their christmas party around you...

yabu.

kormAaaarrrggghhhchameleon · 06/10/2008 10:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Freddysteddy · 06/10/2008 10:27

What korma said. Why should they have to crawl into work with a hangover just to suit your childcare arrangements?

YAB totally U. Very self-centred, I bet your colleagues dislike you immensely.

fircone · 06/10/2008 10:30

grrrrrr.

I remember someone at work saying they couldn't go to the Xmas do and could they have the £100 instead.

Some people.

MrsMatryoshka · 06/10/2008 10:31

YABVU the world dosen't revolve around you ,you know .

Original poster
paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:32

actually Freddysteddy, I think that's a bit uncalled for - as I said I usually try and be flexible at work and help the others out. I'm working between xmas and new year this year so they can have it off!
they've always had it mid week before.

ok I get the message....

OP posts:
JuneBugJen · 06/10/2008 10:33

18 people is a large enough number for it to be a royal PITA to try and accommodate one person.

Sorry, but YABU. (but I still reckon people like you at work unlike FreddyTeddy! )

DrNortherner · 06/10/2008 10:33

Yes, freddy you were rather harsh. OP does not deverve that imo.

BouncingTurtle · 06/10/2008 10:33

Can't please all of the people all of the time.
Should I ask the organiser at my company to move this Xmas party date as it happens to fall on ds's birthday?

YABU, I'm afraid!

BecauseImWorthIt · 06/10/2008 10:33

If you aren't prepared to make childcare arrangements, then don't go.

You are being a tad self-centred here - why should everyone else have to have the party on a day just to suit you, when Friday is probably a much better day?

Original poster
paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:34

and I definitely wouldn't go so far as to ask for the money!!!

OP posts:
monkeymonkeymonkey · 06/10/2008 10:34

I dont think that you can expect everyone else to arrange themselves around you.
Why dont you work Friday that week and take a different day off. I agree it is a pain if DH has to take time off to cover for you, but there probably isnt any way round it (unless you just dont go to the xmas do).
I work part time too, and for the most part it works well, but there are occasions when I have to get DH to take time off his work to allow me to attend certain events.

JuneBugJen · 06/10/2008 10:35

Its the battle of the bears!

compo · 06/10/2008 10:37

can your dh/grandparent pick the kids up from school?

Blondeshavemorefun · 06/10/2008 10:38

yabu (sorry)

try and swap days that week - if not then if you wanted to go,could you bribe/ask another mum at school to pick up your dc and have for play/tea/sleepover etc

christmas do's are nice on a friday

I organsie a nanny one and it is bloody hard to please everyone, so i do what what suits me and tough for all the others - if they dont like it then they can organise it theirselves

hope you manage to go xx

Original poster
paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:40

I am prepared to ask dh to have the afternoon off - I won't pay for childcare not cos I'm that tight, but cos I would feel bad for dd on the last day of term (she is only 5). Any other Friday I would just have swapped my working day.
Ah well I can see I am being a bit selfish here, thanks everyone! I will ask dh and if he can't, just accept I can't go...

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 06/10/2008 10:42

sure your dd wont mind you not picking her up, if she is invited back for a play and tea

DrNortherner · 06/10/2008 10:46

Can you not collect dd, wait for dh to come home and then join them for dinner?

exasperatedmummy · 06/10/2008 10:46

I do understand why you feel cheesed off, i would feel the same, but really, you know you are being unreasonable. If i were you i would try and get your DH to have the afternoon off, tell him now so he can organise it. Is there any member of your family who could perhaps pick DD up, or maybe you could arrange for her to go around to one of her friends houses for tea? That way, it would be a treat for her. You can obviously return the favour by having the friend say one afternoon so her mum can do some xmas shopping. Do what you can to go - but yeah, sometimes we just have to suck it up and get on with it.

Original poster
paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:46

yeah blondes you are probably right! I just don't like to ask friends at that time of year when everyone is busy. (I don't have family near or I'd ask them).
best bet is dh, I think - I could maybe swap my day that week and get him to have the whole day off!

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 06/10/2008 10:48

if it is a half day, bet some parents would be happy to have a friend over to amuse their own child

always worth an ask - there must be some mums you get on well with, and then as expmummy said,you can owe her one the following week/in the ny

Original poster
paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:49

DrNorthener dinner is at 2pm, it's an afternoon 'do' in work time, so I'd be a bit late! I could just go later in the pub, but they'd all be well drunk by then (I know, I've tried it before)...

OP posts:
Original poster
paddingtonbear1 · 06/10/2008 10:55

just to clarify (makes no difference really), the do is in the afternoon not evening.
they used to do evenings but changed it a few years ago.

OP posts:
ScottishMummy · 06/10/2008 11:00

in reality no day suits everyone cant you reschedule your time.you have adequate notice

free food and drink id be gagging to get there not worrying about time etc