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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

do you think it would be wrong for me to go through life, never really doing anything as such

68 replies

freespiritfreedom · 01/10/2008 20:20

i don't like working, i like being a free spirit, i love being a sahm but i guess when my dcs go to school the pressure will be on.

"when you going to get a job" etc.

we don't need the money, do you think it would be wrong for me to go through life never really doing anything much workwise.

i wouldn't mind fannying doing photography and arts and crafts.
but i don't ever want a job again.

OP posts:
corblimeymadam · 01/10/2008 20:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

spottyzebrahasthelurgy · 01/10/2008 20:24

if you don't need the money, I can't see why not.

Portofino · 01/10/2008 20:26

I would love to do this if I had the opportunity. I can think of so many things to occupy myself if I didn't have to work. Unfortunately finances dictate i must. And I must admit I would not be happy to depend solely on DH for money ever. Now if I was independantly wealthy.....sigh.

jawjawnotwarwar · 01/10/2008 20:26

You might feel differently when your dcs have gone to school - so maybe you could reassess when that happens. Why don't you ever want another job? Maybe you just haven't had any good job experiences yet. I think it's good for your self-esteem to earn your own money. Having a job also contributes to your self-identity, so as long as you found something you liked, you might be happier.

pattymc · 01/10/2008 20:26

If you don't want to get a job and you don't need to and you are happy with this then what's the problem. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

Hassled · 01/10/2008 20:27

I think you would eventually go out of your mind. You would crave adult company and end up drinking gin in front of This Morning.

If you don't need the money (and I'm sort of in the same boat - kids at school/Uni and I work very part-time from home) then do some voluntary stuff. There's loads of demand - google your nearest town/city + volunteer service. You can still be a free spirit, but feel worthy at the same time

Original poster
freespiritfreedom · 01/10/2008 20:31

well im not supported in financial terms from my dh, i have independent money [from investments saving and properties inherited]
so thats no problem or issue.

i just don't like being tied down to a job.

OP posts:
Original poster
freespiritfreedom · 01/10/2008 20:33

i don't crave adult company, i have plenty of that.
and i don't drink alcohol.
doesn't agree with me i get sick after 2 drinks

OP posts:
Original poster
freespiritfreedom · 01/10/2008 20:33

i don't crave adult company, i have plenty of that.
and i don't drink alcohol.
doesn't agree with me i get sick after 2 drinks

OP posts:
Lauriefairycake · 01/10/2008 20:35

it is not wrong in any way to do the work - photography, arts, crafts that you feel passionate about and also anchor yourself in the community with a bit of contribution

I also do not have a 'job' but I'm very busy. The last career I had took me two years to get over - I used to wake up in a sweat terrified I had to get up for work

you need to do what makes you content - diffrent strokes and all that

nooka · 01/10/2008 20:36

I think that when your children go to school you will find you are very tied down anyway, as the gap between 9-3 (including travel) is too short to do anything very useful, and your current spontaneity will be much reduced. Personally I feel much freer to be myself when I am working (I have now had six months not working, and feel like I am not really a complete person any more). But then I like to have direction and a function in life, and I have a strong wish to be remembered when I am gone. Of course there are other ways to do that without working, but it's the one that appeals to me.

QueenHerod · 01/10/2008 20:39

Ah do what you want FSF.

PMSL at 'You would crave adult company and end up drinking gin in front of This Morning' though.

findtheriver · 01/10/2008 20:39

Nothing 'wrong' with it. You have independent means, you won't be a burden on the state. Could just get a bit boring I think.

notinlimboanymore · 01/10/2008 20:54

Why not? You are very lucky to have the choice.

ThinWhiteDuchess · 01/10/2008 21:15

YANBU. Who are we to judge - whatever makes you happy makes you happy!

Shitemum · 01/10/2008 21:17
Envy
ScottishMummy · 01/10/2008 21:24

are you prosperous then?who pays mortgage, fills fridge etc.up to you.do what you want

EachPeachPearMum · 01/10/2008 21:26

Are you a potterer?
Or would you choose one thing and do that as your 'hobby'?

elmoandella · 01/10/2008 21:35

you would be doing a job.... housewife???

job description: washing , ironing, cleaning, shopping, kids taxi, cooking, bathing,odd jobs, etc, etc

cantpickyourfamily · 01/10/2008 21:40

if you do not need the money and you dp is happy for you not to work I do not see the problem with it... lucky you...

JuneBugJen · 01/10/2008 21:43

Are you trying to make me jealous?

I would love not to go out to work but be at home with dcs all day and then eventually enjoy a bit of time by myself when they one day go to school.

why are you even wasting a minute of your time thinking you are being unreasonable when so many families would love to be in your position. If you want to be a free spirit then be one!

FrayedKnot · 01/10/2008 21:54

Being in paid employment doesn;t need to define you

Let's face it most of us work because we have to

Even if we enjoy it sometimes

Pursue your interests. Get involved in soemthing you feel passionate about. Help others. Create something.

jellybeans · 01/10/2008 21:56

YANBU I am a SAHM and not in any rush to go back to work, enjoy

mabanana · 01/10/2008 21:57

Sounds blissful.

spottyzebrahasthelurgy · 01/10/2008 23:04

Why not become a photographer then?

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