To think it's not really possible for us both to go our friend's 40th b'day this Sat night?

[mm22bys]

MN jury, need your advice please!

We got an invitation today to a friend's 40th birthday on Saturday night. We have known her for a long time, but don't see each other very often.

We already have plans for Saturday afternoon, which mean having a baby sitter looking after DS1 and DS2 from 1pm till 7pm.

Now DH also wants to go to the party.

I think it would be really unfair on the baby sitter and the DSs to suddenly extend the plans, and I don't think I really want to go anyway, with the short notice and our existing plans. I have told DH he is more than welcome to go on his own.

AIBU?

As long as your children like the babysitter,and the babysitter doesn't mind, then I don't see the problem in extending your plans and you both going to the party.

If your DH wants to go and you don't really want to, so would be happy to stay at home... what the heck is the issue exactly? Does this really merit the MN jury getting involved!!!?

Well, if you don't want to go then don't go.

On the other hand, if you'd quite like to go ask the babysitter if she minds, chances are if you're paying her she won't, especially as presumably the kids will be asleep while you're at the party so it's hardly taxing.

If you don't want to go, then don't go. But your dc will probably be going to bed soon after 7pm, so the babysitter won't have much to do.

I would say both you and dh go to the party and enjoy yourself.

You could return home after the afternoon outing and put the children to bed whilst the babysitter has a break and then go to the 40th party once the children have gone to bed - they won't be missing you as they are asleep (assuming they are good sleepers). The baby sitter will earn even more money or if she is not interested in the evening shift you could have a changeover of babysitters whilst you are puttung the children to bed.

It won't leave you much time to get ready to go out however.

"Unfair on the baby sitter"?

Even if babysitting for the evening as well as afternoon will hurt her feelings , why can't you get another babysitter?

Send your DH on his own. Have a lovely evening in drinking wine, watching what you want on the telly and mumsnetting