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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to not want mil mentioning christmas presents already?

21 replies

canofworms · 03/09/2008 23:05

3 days ago ( so still in August) - my mil came round and predictably, asked my dd's if they had any thoughts on what they want for christmas as she says grandma has to ask santa early

wtf!

It's dd2's birthday sooner than that but that's not been mentioned

I mentioned it was only august

How early do we have to start this hype?!

OP posts:

Alambil · 03/09/2008 23:27

I'm going to start shopping soon; DS's birthday is in October

Maybe she has money worries and needs to spread the cost or doesn't want a last minute rush?

Original poster

canofworms · 03/09/2008 23:29

To be fair, she's very short of money this year but she usually spoils them rotten and buys them far too many presents - we tell her that every year!

I'd rather teach them to be grateful for what they get and the meaning of christmas (we all go to church so she should realise this)

OP posts:

lowrib · 03/09/2008 23:30

Does she need to "ask santa early" because she needs time to save up? If so, perhaps you ABU.

Original poster

canofworms · 03/09/2008 23:34

Yes but if she needs to save up she still has over 3 months to do it!

We do not buy lots for our kids at christmas so we don't see why she should - especially if she can't afford it.

Often they've forgotten what they've asked for because she asks so early!

OP posts:

lowrib · 03/09/2008 23:49

"Often they've forgotten what they've asked for because she asks so early!" isn't that a good thing? At least they get a surprise!

If she wants to spoil them at Christmas so what?! She is enjoying her grandchildren, and they are lucky to have a granny like her.

3 months is actually not long if you are on a very low income.

I think you are being a bit mean TBH.
If she goes on about it from now till Christmas I can see that would get boring, but if it comes from necessity and she then drops the subject then I can't see the problem ...?

Original poster

canofworms · 03/09/2008 23:57

She doesn't drop the subject - that's part of the problem.

To start it in August and have the continual asking until December is a bit much for any child, surely?

They then usually get loads of things they've not asked for, plus everything they ever even mention to her

I think I'm probably more miffed because my mum will ask them a few weeks before and they will get just 1 present from her. I'm then a bit embarrassed by my mil's over-enthusiasm (for want of a better word!)

OP posts:

hollyandnoah · 04/09/2008 01:43

btw, my sister has done about 90% of her christmas shop. She still has my dad, brother and oh to buy for. Three men. Everyone else is bought for!!
I have started buying, but only for my ds.
We have 5 birthdays in December as well as all the Christmas. And we are going to Paris for Christmas so we thought we'd start early, she is just much more organised than me!

eidsvold · 04/09/2008 03:53

I have already sorted my dds and my neices and nephews christmas presents. Here in QLd we have huge toy sales in the middle of the year and you can get great stuff at very reasonable prices. You can then layby it - and you have until Christmas Eve to pay it off and pick it up. Means we can do our christmas shopping and it is sorted without spending huge amounts of money and it is stored elsewhere - especially as this year they are getting a trampoline!! until it is needed.

i then get to pay off the children's presents at a very low amount each week. Then I can just worry about the adult stuff - we also have to do end of school year things and in January - Back to school expenses so being able to save up or pay it off is great!

Eirlys · 04/09/2008 04:51

I'll say YANBU - going on about Christmas for the next 4 months suggests that the latter part of the year is all build up to Christmas.

...My mil asked in July !
Thankfully she doesn't go on about it, because DS is only 5 months and has changed so much in that time (his 9-12 month vests are looking a bit tight) so I wouldn't like to chance clothes until just before, and how am I going to know what he likes to play with?

Eirlys · 04/09/2008 04:56

I'll say YANBU - going on about Christmas for the next 4 months suggests to your DDs that the latter part of the year is all build up to Christmas.

...My mil asked in July !
Thankfully she doesn't go on about it though. DS is only 5 months and has changed so much in that time (his 9-12 month vests are now looking a bit tight) so I wouldn't like to chance clothes until just before, and how am I going to know what sort of things he will like to play with? Although I strongly suspect whatever he gets he'll be most enthralled by the packaging.

Shells · 04/09/2008 04:59

yanbu canofworms. my MIL does this too and overdoes it massively every year even though we ask her not too. Hate the way it spoils the kids when we try so hard not to spoil them.

mymama · 04/09/2008 07:27

I can see why it bothers you, but I wish I had the same problem!

My mil doesn't buy my dc anything and she is the only grandparent they have .

zipzap · 04/09/2008 17:33

Well I've already spotted Christmas decorations and cards in a couple of shops - although last year I managed to see some in August.

Did think about buying something just so that by the time I have finished the last minute panic buying on christmas eve (or after christmas for those people we see afterwards it has been known ) then on average things will have been bought at a reasonable sort of time .

And unfortunately there are no santa emoticons yet to add to the message...

all of which was skewing off topic - getting back to it, no, YANBU to be fed up with it. If nothing else it is taking your enjoyment of christmas away if you start off having to feel fed up about it in August - talk about getting things off on the wrong foot! And surely it shouldn't make any difference at the moment as to what is on their list (not only because it may well change between now and christmas) - she knows she will want to save up for the presents, she knows how much she is going to want to spend so she saves up that amount and spends it closer to the time. or am I missing something?

Mutt · 04/09/2008 17:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

kitsmummy · 04/09/2008 20:26

YABU really. She may just like getting this sort of thing done early to avoid a December rush, or she may be able to get stuff in the sales now?

ShyBaby · 04/09/2008 20:52

As soon as ds's birthday in August is over I start shopping for christmas, a precautionary measure perhaps in case for some reason I dont have money then. (Has been known to happen).

I dont understand why you would be so upset over it, some people do just start early

Elkat · 04/09/2008 21:02

Sorry, but yeah I do think yabu. I've already started getting lots of bits and bobs for my two DDs Birthday and Xmas... this time of year is good because you can pick up lots of bits in the sales, half price for the same item that will be full price in a few weeks time. I get most my stuff in sales this way. If you don't like shopping that early, then don't do it, but there's no reason why she shouldn't.

Shoegazer · 04/09/2008 21:19

YABU I already have all of DD's presents sorted and they are all wrapped and waiting in the loft because I always buy all our xmas wrapping paper and cards etc in the sales in January. I like to be prepared

bozza · 04/09/2008 21:27

The problem is though that the DC grow and spot new things between Sept and Dec so sometimes it is difficult to know what they want so far in advance. And unfortunately I found that last Christmas they had changed their minds by October but too late...

ethanchristopher · 04/09/2008 23:52

hahahahha.

i went to a card fair in llandudno 24th august and it was pretty much all christmas themed

i almost wanted to call home and say, have i been in a coma? is it december already?

colacubes · 04/09/2008 23:59

My mun has got the kids pressies already, had the anual "what do ya think of this" show and tell about 6 weeks ago, not a big deal, wish i could be more organised.

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