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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To say to a friend who claimed she was unable to breast feed because of her previous 'breast augmentation' op (without any sense of irony) that...

69 replies

May2December · 20/08/2008 21:27

this is the equivalent of a man having his penis enlarged but no longer able to get an erection or ejaculate! I have nothing against women not breast feeding or having breast enhancing surgery but if this prevents a woman from breastfeeding(which I do not believe for one minute- it would be tantamount to mutilation) then for pure vanity you are rendering your breasts useless for their original purpose to make them 'look' more appealing!

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 20/08/2008 21:29

You're really not much of a friend are you?

ReallyTired · 20/08/2008 21:30

Prehaps people don't make sensible decisions at the age of 18 or even in their twenties. People don't think about having children when they are young, yet alone breastfeeding.

I don't think she is to blame, but its sad that the surgeon damaged her breasts making them useless. There are women who do breastfeed after breast enlargement. It all depends on what is done.

2point4kids · 20/08/2008 21:30

My god, wouldnt like to be your friend!

constancereader · 20/08/2008 21:32

is this for real?

if so, I too am very glad I am not your friend.

thelittlestbadger · 20/08/2008 21:32

Do you really think about breast feeding from puberty? I certainly didn't. It wouldn't have occurred to me that breast ops would have made bf impossible and I can imagine that it would be quite distressing to find that out.

I also don't think it is the same as a man being unable to get an erection (which probably can be a side effect anyway) because like it or not, breasts do have a meaning other than feeding children.

Original poster

May2December · 20/08/2008 21:35

But surely she is lying to me - I do not believe that breast augmentation prevents breast feeding. So why does she not say she prefers not to, and if she is telling the truth then surely this 'procedure' is mutilating women and they should be told these risks when they opt for this type of surgery.

OP posts:

ParCark · 20/08/2008 21:36

Message withdrawn

sandy4 · 20/08/2008 21:36

yes, of course YABU!!!!!

blueskythinker · 20/08/2008 21:36

How does your 'friend' feel about this? Is she happy to ff, or was she hoping to BF and it didn't work out?

Do you even know, or have you been too busy judging?

BoysAreLikeDogs · 20/08/2008 21:37

Why are you bothered, May?

Nowt to do with you in the end, eh?

desperatehousewifetoo · 20/08/2008 21:37

How do you know that she wasn't told about this risk?

theinsider · 20/08/2008 21:37

Oh of course it does May, you're either being incredibly naive or disingenous. Neither is flattering.

And as other posters said, the surgeon will likely have warned her and she decided to go ahead anyway.

sandy4 · 20/08/2008 21:37

Breast augmentation can prevent a woman from breastfeeding.

ParCark · 20/08/2008 21:38

Message withdrawn

jellybeans · 20/08/2008 21:39

Alot of it is down to our society but can see your point.

misdee · 20/08/2008 21:39

arent they tqwo ways of doing augmentations. one can prevent breastfeeding, one has less chance of preventing breastfeeding.

i would love my breats to be lifted and looking good again, but for now its not an option.

ReallyTired · 20/08/2008 21:39

"But surely she is lying to me - I do not believe that breast augmentation prevents breast feeding."

Is it really any of business, prehaps she wants an easy life rather than a telling off from a breastfeeding zealot.

Worry about your own children rather than other people's within reason. Parents have the right to make their own decision about doing nasty things like bottlefeeding or sending child to nursery or private school. They should not have to face the spanish inquisition.

(By the way I breastfed my son for two years)

combustiblelemon · 20/08/2008 21:40

Maybe she was worried that if she told you that she didn't want to BF you might be a lttle judgemental...

mamalovesmojitos · 20/08/2008 21:41

YABVU

oh my god, it is none of your business.

you sound terribly judgemental, and not like a good friend.

ChasingSquirrels · 20/08/2008 21:42

I remember asking me ex SIL how she was feeding the baby (just a general question), and she immediately told me that she was bottle feeding as she couldn't bf due to a breast-job. I had bf ds1 for 4/5mo exc, then mixed fed till 9mo, I certainly wasn't militant AT ALL about BF, so there was no reason for her to explain the bottle feeding to me, yet she did unprompted.
I too was suprised (I had no idea that it would stop you bf) and thought it was a shame that it did so. I didn't say this to her though.

Monkeytrousers · 20/08/2008 21:42

Human breasts actually have multible 'original' functions. One of them is to attract the opposite sex. That's why they are bigger than your common or garden primate knockers.

ChasingSquirrels · 20/08/2008 21:42

my ex SIl

lilyloo · 20/08/2008 21:43

My friend had breast augmentation after 2 dc's she now has 5 and bf each subsequent one.

SheikYerbouti · 20/08/2008 21:43

I'd hate you to be my friend.

I'd tell you it;s none of your farking business then show you my arse

Original poster

May2December · 20/08/2008 21:43

I am absolutely truly appalled that these ops can prevent women from breastfeeding, as some of you say many young women will see this as inconsequential in their late teens and early twenties (and beyond, friend was 31 when she had this done) but can be devastating after birth. You are all right it was a cruel thing to say to a friend and I will apologise but I am now angry with the whole idea of this operation!

OP posts:

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