to be annoyed at strangers touching my children in their buggy?

[penona]

A man literally stopped me in the street today, blocked my path, and then peered into the buggy and we went through the usual 'Are they twins?' (yes) 'Two boys?' (No the one in pink is a girl...) 'Are they identical?' (no, it's a boy and a girl).... and then he leaned in and STROKED my daughters face and started to stroke my sons foot! All the while cooing aren't they lovely etc etc. I just stared in shock and did not know what to do.

In the end my DD screamed so loudly he backed off apologising.

What is the etiquette here? Lean over and yank at his moustache and say 'Oh how bristly' or something? Ask him politely not too touch them please? I couldn't very well run away with a double buggy in tow.

Or was he just being friendly and I am being a bit precious? (This happens quite often to me so I should learn to deal with it).

Please tell me if IABU!!!!

When I go back to my parents' place in a little village I realise the appeal villages have once you are a parent, a proper community still exists. For years I wondered why they moved out of London to the middle of nowhere - now I know. Hope you are somewhere nice in the Uk bloss - Sydney is beautiful. Not sure I'd have been pleased to leave that behind!

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I can understand that this may annoy but at the same time i think its a bit unreasonable.

My grandad, at the ripe old age of 80, still gets broody when he sees a little baby. Luckily for him our family seem to have at least 1 baby a year. He will make a point to stop and talk to someone pushing a pram just so he can coo over the little one. He is the kindest gentelest person i have ever met and It would REALLY piss me off if someone thought he was a loon because he wanted to tell you how beautiful your baby is!!

Why on earth is there so many posts deleted??

I think YANBU. I don't think the op was saying she didn't like people making a fuss and looking at her dc. I think she was more annoyed about people touching her dc.

It is possible to admire and fuss over a child without touching them! Imo, it's very rude to just touch someones child without asking the parent if it's ok first. I for one am not paranoid about germs etc but i do have very valid and personal reasons why i would prefer strangers NOT to touch my dd.

When dd was a baby and i was shoppping in the supermarket, i would regularly get strangers coming up touching dd and i remember walking away feeling really shitty and down. I would never want to make someone feel like that so i would never touch someones little one that i didn't know.

It's not about having a society that hates children and making that assumption just because some parents don't want their want dc touched by strangers is abit exstream.

You just seem to get people who think it's ok do what they like, like touching a pregnant bump. I would NEVER go up and touch a bump unless it was a friend and they had said first it was ok to so. Some people just don't have any boundries!

there are so many posts deleted because there was a troll on this thread last night. IHVH posted "." about three dozen times, and then started tons of threads with the same non message. reported to mnhq so that the real messages were still visible, and the debate could continue.

Oh I think it's a terrible shame that friendly contact from strangers is frowned upon. Like a few other posters here, I've found that I feel more part of the community since having DD. It doesn't bother me at all if strangers stroke her face or her lovely little feet. She loves the attention but if she didn't, she would make it clear. I really don't see the issue.

completely styandard behaviour from strangers, especially elderly people, in these parts.

i say enjoy the admiration. It won't last long

Italians make the biggest fuss of children until quite an old age . On our trips to Italy it isn't unsusal for my 3.8 yar old ds (An age that elicits not much more than general annoyance in the UK) to get regular comments about how lovely he is and 'look at that lovely child' etc. Much as I adore my ds and think he is lovely, he really isn't any more gorgeous than any other chld his age (objectively speaking anyway)

The flip side of this however is that you will also be subject to a flurry of unasked for advice and comments from complete strangers. EG 'that child needs a hat/sweater on' etc.

After one meal out with Ds this year, where he managed to find a toy gun belonging to restaurant owner and preceeeded to point it at random, shout loudly and be generally annoying. any attemps by me to stop him were met by the restaurant staff saying 'he's fine, he's just playing etc.'

I was then told what a lovely child he was when I went to pay just as I was about to appologise for his behaviour. Quite frankly the woman was a loon and in the UK I'd probably have been asked to leave as ds was making such a nuisance of himself but that is Italy for you.

It really is not unusal for children to be touched, stroked etc by complete strangers. I personally find it a bit intrusive but only because it can get in the way of getting anything done!!

I do not think your being over the top I agree with u When My god child was 3mths old some lady stuck her head in his pram and he got Nits. You really dont know where these people have been

Don't mind it at all. Happened about 4 times today alone-various pats on heads by several waiters, cheeks pinched (by an Italian lady) etc etc. DD loves it. She's quite happy to thrash her arms and push me away when she doesn't want to be touched so would do it to strangers too if she didn't like it, i assume. Never happened yet.

I would never touch a child in a pushchair in the street, unless I knew the mum and child well. Some children aren't that good with strangers, and sometimes, mums are trying to get from one place to another and just want to get on!
(I use the same rule for dogs, actually.)

YANBU to have your boundaries, but I don't think that the old person in question was being unreasonable, either.