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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that people should not smoke in a childs outdoor play area?

157 replies

pamelat · 17/08/2008 19:51

I know it isnt illegal but surely its wrong morally?

I was at the park on Friday with my PFB (!) who is 7 months and we were on the swings when a set of grandparents turned up with a little boy who looked to be about 2 years old. They sat him on the swing next to my DD and the woman lit a cigarette and proceeded to smoke.

The park was full of children.

I think its really wrong?

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 17/08/2008 20:23

'I would quite like to have a glass of wine on a sunny Friday afternoon but I wouldnt take a bottle to a childs play area? What kind of impression is that giving to them? '

Um, that it's no big deal to have a glass of wine of an afternoon?

I'd rather they learn that alcohol is to be enjoyed sensibly rather than shield them entirely from it and have them go crazy when they're teens with their pals.

wahwah · 17/08/2008 20:24

Flipping heck, I wouldn't care if you had a glass of wine in front of my child - he's got to pass all the tramps drinking Supertennants on the way in (and they're very sweet to him) anyway!

WideWebWitch · 17/08/2008 20:25

When I smoked I did so in the park. It was outside, I was careful about not in childrens faces etc plus I was careful about not leaving fag ends as they're dangerous if children try to eat them (pretty dangerous to the adult who smoked them too!)

So I think YABU.

Original poster
pamelat · 17/08/2008 20:25

expatinscotland - I quite enjoyed going crazy as a teen

Maybe I have funny views, I just dont think that its the sort of thing you do in a public area with kids around during the day?

Strange really as would have a glass of wine at a friends though.

Anyway, back to the smoking lark ...

OP posts:
brimfull · 17/08/2008 20:27

wouldn't bother me tbh

I would just move if they were blowing it too close to us.

I love the smell of cigarettes actualy

findtheriver · 17/08/2008 20:30

Totally disgusting. Really pisses me off that people can think it's ok for anyone else to have to smell their fags. Not just a children issue. We all have a right to not be subjected to it.

expatinscotland · 17/08/2008 20:30

'expatinscotland - I quite enjoyed going crazy as a teen '

You're very lucky you didn't wind up like so many who are increasingly suffering long-term health issues from binge drinking.

YABU.

If you don't like other peoples' legal behaviour outdoors in public space, best look the other way or move to a really isolated area or something.

Definitely don't move to W. Scotland, where kids are playing the machines in pubs and playing in beer gardens whilst Mum and Dad watch the footie.

TheRealMrsJohnSimm · 17/08/2008 20:33

YANBU.

I'm sorry but when smokers say "oh but its outside" it really makes me laugh. It implies that others cannot smell the vile smell of cigarette smoke out in the fresh air. I'm telling you ladies, to a non-smoker it is blatantly obvious when someone near you is smoking and even if you think you are standing far enough away, the stench still gets to others. Absolute twaddle. I think its outrageous that adults think its okay to smoke in a kids play park.

southeastastra · 17/08/2008 20:37

i'm more worried about kids who smoke in the play areas after dark. i've found so many empty fag packs and beer bottles in parks first thing in the morning.

Original poster
pamelat · 17/08/2008 20:39

Goodness 34 replies, I almost feel popular.

Not making light of binge drinking (know a few people who have serious problems with it, including 2 who arent around anymore). Just trying to lighten the tone as I didn't want to sound condescending (which bits of my posts possibly did).

To repeat, I was genuinely shocked that people (1 of them) did smoke in the park. Mentioned it to a few friends since Friday and all of them had been shocked, including ex smoker DH.

One of his friends is a big smoker and he always asks him to wash his hands before touching DD. DD puts everything in her mouth and I would rather smelly nicotine fingers not be one of those. The smoking friend doesnt mind .

I sort of thought that maybe everyone (except this 1 woman!) was of a similar mindset. Does me good to broaden my horizons.

However, if anyone lights up I will be removing DD. Beer garden, fine, you expect it (so wouldnt take her there) but a park?

OP posts:
redrobin · 17/08/2008 20:41

YANBU...stinks, sets a bad example to the children and frankly looks a bit 'common' as my mil would say.

Original poster
pamelat · 17/08/2008 20:41

This park closes at night(I think its fairly closely monitored because there used to be some trouble) and there is a teengage equivalent nearby, this one is just for under 10's (hopefully during the day they arent drinking and smoking?)

OP posts:
southeastastra · 17/08/2008 20:48

it's the school holidays, loads of teenagers gather in the park and smoke.

even if the under 10 area did have a sign, who would enforce the rule - it says no dogs on our local under 10 area but rotweillers run about and parents smoke and drink like a day at the seaside.

ilovemydog · 17/08/2008 20:51

Well, I am 'precious' about it, and would prefer that DD's lungs aren't subjected to smoke. She's on inhalers and needs oxygen frequently.

If someone is smoking in a public place, albeit outdoors, then while it's technically legal, it's bad manners.

I'm justified in asking them to put it out. 99% of the time, they do. if not, we'll leave.

And I'm not talking about open spaces. I'm talking about the areas that have a roof, but are technically outside, such as the zoo, but for all intents and purposes are enclosed.

shootfromthehip · 17/08/2008 20:57

I am 'off the fags' for a mere week (as it really is a bad example to my LOs) but have not turned in to condescending anti-smoker as yet- still too tearful at what I'm missing

Smoking in the park is a tricky one- I have done it myself and suffered the looks of reproach from others but where was I supposed to do it? Can't do it in the street as it looks common- can't do it in the house OBVIOUSLY- can't go to a pub/ cafe etc so where?

I think people need to be sensitive- I always blew smoke away from kids and am not pretending that people can't smell it but it is, as far as i'm aware, still a democracy here in the UK so until they ban smoking completely then it will be something that some people will do.

Original poster
pamelat · 17/08/2008 20:58

Am happy to be 'precious' about my childs health too (and my own).

Not sure if there is any research about whether the smoke is a danger passively if outdoors (there probably is some somewhere and its more than likely inconclusive). Just feels wrong to me so will go with my instinct and keep DD away from anyone smoking.

OP posts:
hughjarssss · 17/08/2008 21:01

'And I'm not talking about open spaces'

Well this thread is all about open spaces!?!

SilkCutMama · 17/08/2008 21:02

Oh for goodness sake. You non-smoking lot wanted all smokers to smoke outside only and now they do you are still complaining.

I have never seen a smoker blow the smoke into a child's face and I don't think they would tbh

expatinscotland · 17/08/2008 21:02

there's an all-covered zoo? where? i need one - too many damn wasps here and the weather's been shite.

i don't smoke, but if someone told me to put it out in a public place where it's legal i'd tell them to take a long walk on a short pier, tbh.

KerryMum · 17/08/2008 21:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hughjarssss · 17/08/2008 21:02

The clue being in the title : 'outdoor'

southeastastra · 17/08/2008 21:03

to be fair though i do think that it is more polite and good manners to not smoke or drink in play areas, most i've seen are just small areas.

been doing tons of park visits this week as part of my job and the amount of dog poo i've found in the enclosed areas disgusts me more than fag butts

expatinscotland · 17/08/2008 21:06

minging, south! there are stories on here about kids who've lost sight in an eye after getting hold of dog crap.

ilovemydog · 17/08/2008 21:09

well, to hell with my dd's lungs then, expat. As long as you could have your cigarette.

Swearing and a range of other anti social behavior is legal. In fact, so is taking methadone, which my DD asked about last week when we were getting her prescription filled.

So, I asked the pharmacist if they could do it out of range of children and he agreed.

legal, yes. Is it something I want my children to see, no.

ilovemydog · 17/08/2008 21:12

what does dog crap have to do with smoking?

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