To put my 2 year old on his potty in a restaurant?

[Volodya]

I took 2yo ds and 7mo dd up to town yesterday. We're on week 2 of potty training ds. It's going fine but I still carry a potty everywhere I go.

I was planning to get us sandwiches for lunch and sit outside but it was raining so we ended up in a museum cafe at lunchtime. Of course I tried to put ds on the potty before we went in and of course he declined to do anything.

When we were about 15 minutes into the meal, both children in high chairs, everything liberally smeared with pasta bolognese and spinach puree, dd's buggy piled high with all her lunch detritus (cool bag, bits of rice cake, muslin, blah blah), ds announced that he needed his potty. That tends to mean that he needs it NOW.

So rather than clearing everything out of the buggy, strapping in spinach-covered dd, packing everything up, picking up bolognese-covered ds, and heading off to find out where the loos were, I simply whisked the potty under the table between ds's high chair and the buggy and popped him on, crouching down in front of him so that (I hoped) he was virtually hidden from view. (It was not a busy cafe and we weren't very close to any other tables).

Within about a minute and a half I was approached by the waiter asking if we could "transfer your son to the toilets", citing health and safety and saying that he'd already had a couple of complaints from other customers! I said that I didn't see how this could be done, with dd, buggy etc and ds already on the potty...! The waiter was v sympathetic and said he completely understood but that he was in a difficult position because of other customers' complaining. Fortunately the situation was resolved at that point by ds standing up to reveal a clean potty...

So WIBU to put him in the potty in the restaurant in that situation? (WIBU to leave my house on week 2 of potty training?!) How would you have handled this differently?

I agree it's unpleasant and innappropriate but come on, what an over-reaction, FFS people!

WTF is going on? Potty? Restaurant? How utterly revolting.

what moondog said covers it all

I think the only time this could be acceptable is if you were the only people in the cafe/restaurant at the time.

totally unreasonable.

No tweeni. Not even then. If wee or poo was spilt, and somebody came to sweep the floor at the end of the day, somebody elses POO would be smeared all across the restaurant floor. Then somebody drops a knife or a fork, and simply picks it up....

What were you thinking?

I'd have complained if I was in the restaurant.

yes
ffs why do people think that other people wnat to see their kids on the loo

People did this right in front of us on beach the other day, there was a public loo within walking distance

fyi same goes for nappy changes

This is really odd. I totally agree is unacceptable. I would ask people at next table to watch stuff, grab baby and toddler and run to loo. But didn't someone once post about changing a nappy on a cafe table and everyone said that was fine? I think it's worse. ugh.

i can't imagine anyone saying it was fine to change a nappy on a cafe table . perhaps in the pushchair or on your lap if there were no changing facilities and you were the only customers in there.

I have just been on holiday to France where baby changing facilities do not seem to exist so several times changed my DD's nappy in a restaurant (albeit normally outside).

Just out of interest, what do you propose doing in these circumstances?

change nappy in cafe table?yes why not attend to some necrotic wounds whilst you are at it

disgusting. am glad that i wasnt there as i would have complained as well. Would you let him use his potty next to his kitchen table at home?

Ewe - i would change nappy in the toilets. I don't think being outside makes a difference does it? There are still other people eating around you.

I wouldn't have used the toilets at most of these places myself, they are all unisex and most had no toilet seats so nowhere to sit.

I know people are eating but is it really that big a deal? It's not like the wee or poo flies into there meal, I agree, it's not ideal and if it can be avoided it should be yet I am still failing to see what everyone is quite so worried about .

YABU. You should notput him on the potty in an eating area.

oh dear, YABU totally I'm afraid !

as much as i like children.dont like their faecal matter and bare arses when i am eating

I'm in the majority here, but am I the only person in the world who thinks it's absolutely gross to change a shitty nappy in the sitting room or, indeed, anywhere other than the bathroom? I have been horrified by friends gaily whipping a filthy nappy off their baby's bum IN MY SITTING ROOM without even asking if it's OK.

Sorry but I think YABU.

People do not want to see some kid urinating/defecating whilst they are eating their lunch

That's even before you consider the health issue.

By Volodya on Tue 05-Aug-08 20:17:37
OK thanks everyone I get the message!

I will be Better Organised in future...

I'm with you on that one bluestocking. In fact, this is what makes me wonder whether some people are just trying to prove a point with their nappy changing habits. People may sometimes have a point that public loos and changing facilites are not the nicest places in the world, but a domestic bathroom is likely to be one of the most hygienic rooms in the house. My bathroom is certainly cleaner than my sitting room sofa, which often has cats sleeping on it, kids sitting with their feet up on it..... so why, when I was at the baby stage, have friends who did exactly what you describe bluestocking? - they would merrily whip their baby's shitty nappy off and start changing them on the sofa! Never understood the logic! I just told my friends quite firmly to use the bathroom, where, surprise surprise, there is hot and cold running water to wash your hands afterwards too!
I honestly think some people are just so precious about their kids that they really cannot understand that the rest of the world doesnt want to see them shitting and pissing!

At friends houses I never took my son to the toilet to change his nappy. I dont think any of my friends minded medoing in their sitting rooms (or maybe they were too polite to say )

but equally I never changed him on the sofa. I always carried a folding changing mat and used that on afloor.

if it was a poohy nappy I would place myself between the changing mat and my friends so they didnt have to see.

Where were you, bluestocking and findtheriver, the other night when i needed you??? I seemed to be getting shot down in flames and made to feel very Hyacinth-ish because I said on another post that I wouldn't like anyone to change their baby's nappy in my living-room!!!!!

Hello and thank god, you've made me see it isn't just me!!!!!

i think it is rude to change a nappy in someone's living room if you know that's not where they would do it. should always check first.

I don't think a changing mat on the floor in a friends house is awful, frasersmummy - it just seems sensible to use the bathroom when you have to go and wash your hands afterwards anyway! (Hopefully!)
I also always used plain water to wash my babies bums, rather than expensive babywipes, so I guess this is why the bathroom seems the logical place to be!
Also, when you're at the potty stage, I think it's only fair to the child to give them a bit of privacy - having a dump shouldnt be a public performance - not fair on the child or the audience!