To tell my sister she is no longer welcome in my flat.

[charlotte121]

This morning my kitchen and living room were immaculate... I can just about cope with the mess in the rest of the flat so long as those rooms are tidy.
My sister came over this afternoon to watch the kids whilst I went to an important meeting. She also offered to cook dinner and brought the ingreadients round... great i thought.... NO!

She has just gone and my house is a pit! Its going to take me hours to get it straight again and I have to get it done tonight as Im going I have a competiton to attend tomorrow and people coming round in the evening.
this sint the first time she has done it and I could just cry... I have never seen my house look like this. Im sick of it, she never treats my house with respect and put her feet all over my furniture when I ask her not to (they stink!!!) she lets her dd climb all over my sofas and make them all misshapen, they make endless amounts of mess and dirty dishes and never clear up after themselves. They just disrespect my rules of my house and do as they please and im sick of it... would i be eveil to just ask them not to come over anymore. Im fed up with it!!!

so you'd lose a babysitter who offers to make dinner for you?

YOu poor thing. YOu're obviously very tired and pissed off, but the mess can be cleared up, and the place can be tidied. It's more difficult to mend broken relationships though, and you do need that support at the moment don't you?

Have a bath and a glass of wine, put the tv on and relax.

After you've cleaned up the mess that is.

hmmm well this was the first time she has done something for me... its usually me doing her favours which she forces me to do even tho i have a 14 month old and a 7 week old.

It wasnt worth it.... If i had known the ammount of mess it would have created I would have taken the kids with me, Im not ungreatful but just fed up of this happening every time she pops in no matter what i say. In her house if u spill a crumb she goes ballisitic!!! Why cant she have the same respect for my things?

wine is a good idea... on my second glass...

You'll have to go round to hers from now on then. Do you get on with her though?

Though I feel kind of sorry for you no one has ever offered to babysit my kids all afternoon let alone cook...

but you have a 14 month old a 7 week old and what on earth are you doing going to a competetion !!!!

Yes, what competition is it? [nosey]

Does it involve the cotham possie?

do you want a constructive answer or just a rant (genuine question - rants are entirely legitimate ). if you do want an answer then I would say (esp as she was cooking for you and looking after you kids) that you should just learn from teh experience - as you've siad yourself the help she was giving wasn;t worth the downside. so don;t repeat the experience. don;t ask her and if she offers politely wriggle out of it. but it's not worth sacrificing your relationship with a big dramatic gesture telling her she's not welcome. we all have people in life who, if we come across them in particular circumstances, make us cross (rightly or wrongly). the solution, if you want to rub along and get along with with people, is to avoid those circumstances.

just so u no the meeting was only an hour and I had had her dd all morning.

The competiton is a show garden a taunton flower show....sorry to disapoint, cotham possie are not involved lol.
Im gutted, i didnt get to take part in the construction side of it but promised I would be there to support them tomorrow and my mum is coming along with me so i dont have to cope with the kids alone.

I think that sounds like a good idea... I'll just not invite her over again, she does just turn up tho, walks in and starts scoffing my food. I have said it would be polite if she could ask before she took something as there have been several instances where i have gone to make a packed lunch and not been able to because she has eaten it and then ended up having to buy it at uni and spending a fiver.

I do love my sister but she is the most trying person... she is very difficult to get along with at times and it makes me want to scream.

Hmmmm, I've got a similar age gap between my two and one thing you learn v. quickly is that you should never jeopardise any offers of help.

Consider it a glimpse into the future when your two are the same age as mine (2 and 3) and your flat will look like that every second of every day!

YOu'll have to get combination locks for the cupboards and the fridge.

I would point it out to her - also given that you have just had a baby, I wouldn't have been looking after her one

I have been looking after her dd quite a lot so she can go to the gym because quote "she looked after ds when i was in hosp"

I have pointed it out to her but she is very selfish... a few weeks ago when i had just had dd she left it solely to me to look after my mum who was having radiotherqapy... she makes my blood boil at times and then other times she can be so nice and so much fun and she is the only person who i have in rl who is a lone parent.

I know how you feel.
I like my home to be clean and tidy but my sister is a slob, in fact I am out numbered by them, First DH grew up in a house full of lazy slobs and would happily sit in shite his whole family live in filth, new DP will leave mess everywhere he goes, my children can take a room apart in record time and my sister has never been known to hang up an item of clothing.

When she stays ith me I have endless washing to pick up off the floor and glasses to wash.

Take a deep deep breath and have a large glass of wine.