To want to bin the rotting stuffed stocking hair heads...

[snowleopard]

You know the ones... from a kit, stockings stuffed with sawdust, grass seeds in the top, comedy facial features stuck on, water them and woohoo, grass hair.

Fun at first, now revolting and mouldy, but still growing loads of grass and DS loves them.

They are in the kitchen and I would really really like to dispose of them.

How do I nicely explain to 3yo DS that they have to go?

Can they not have a "new home" in the garden where they can die to their hearts content?

tell ds they're full of maggots now

Trouble with garden is, when it rains (as it does all the fecking time) this washes off their crappy facial features (stuck on with the crappy glue provided). So that means faffing about with DS trying to stick them back onto the mouldy stocking. Might end up dong that though.

ehhm pointydog, that would be a plus for DS

Can you tell him they are bored in the kitchen and would love to play outside in the garden?
I did that with DD's a couple of years back and then when they mysteriously disappearred I told her they had been taken by cute woodland animals back to their den.
She believed me too, fucking numpty!

ah.

secretyly pour a bit of weedkiller on them to kill the grass and then ds they're all done.

Superglue the faces on and put them in the garden. DS can check on the every day to make sure they're okay and you don't have to look at them.

Oooh muggle, now that's the sort of thing. rofl at fucking numpty.

ooh good I like these too.

I think superglue, garden, then eventual weedkiller if necessary or abduction by foxes.

Ah snowleopard I was lucky to get a fucking numpty when I chose to have a child. She's almost 7 and believed me last month when I told her that McDonalds was shut because it was raining and the people inside were there because they were repairmen.

I do believe she may be a bit dim, and long may it last [gtin]