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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to whack my neighbour???

33 replies

nelix2000 · 23/07/2008 10:01

Ok let me explain......not long moved into a house, older lady (50s) next door said she was glad she had quiet neighbours (me, ds and dp) as her old ones bullied her, tried to take her parking space (its a street not private) etc.

SO my dp and I try and park our cars right infront of our house squeezed in so as to not upset neighbour giving her the whole length of her house for her one car while we skillfully paralell park daily to squeeze infront of our house with two cars. Its a small villiage its kind of an unwritten rule that your parking is infront of your house...BUT it is a street and we can legally park anywhere. But one day neighbour blew her old witches hump right off her back when my car was 2 foot...yes 2 foot infront of her house. I am not petty...i dint mind parking round the corner...just not when i have ds and a load of shopping.

So the parking was begins...on her part anyway...she edges her car RIGHT infront of my house by 3 foot then in turn meaning the rest of the street have to rearange their parking. Silly old boot.....who says she wants no trouble!...we are not playing this game and park one car elsewhere if she is doing this.

THEN last night at 1145pm......her adult son and his girlfirend (there are 3 adults and two 8-9 yr old kids live in a small house) decided to play hip hop till 2am (unless she is a closet bling granny and listens to dr dre in the early hours...it was her son) waking my son up for 3 hours screaming!!!!!

Was I unreasonable to wait until she left this morning and park my car infront of her house AND put classical russian opera (the most polar opposite to hip hop i could imagine) whilst i hoovered my upstairs knowing they were all sleeping after late night dancing??? Was it really wrong??as we all know regardless of how late kids are awake they still wake at 7am!...so my exhausted baby boy woke up hungry so I fed him then did my housework at an innapropriate hour. was IBU?

1st post on here be gentle...I dont think i was being naughty really.....there are 3 adults next door non of whom work so its fine for them to stay up till all hours mid week...dp and I dont have that luxury....so I say F*ck em!!!! tell me I am still sane.......and this old gangster granny has not tipped me over the edge of sanity....

OP posts:
cornsilk · 23/07/2008 10:04

Go girl!

Original poster
nelix2000 · 23/07/2008 10:07

parking was????parking war!!!!!

OP posts:
HumphreySmallPillow · 23/07/2008 10:13

YABU.

You should have asked the son to turn the music down, or called the police to do it.

I wouldn't have put up with my child screaming for three hours during the night - I would have dealt with the neighbours.

Venting your anger over the music by parking in front of her house will just carry on this petty 'parking war'.

I know from experience that neighbour disputes can become petty and unpleasant.

Why not speak to her, and let her know that you will park in front of your house when you can, but sometimes that is not possible - as she knows, because sometimes she parks in front of yours.

Be friendly and up front about it all, then she'll have no ammunition to act like a child about it.

slowlygoingcrazy · 23/07/2008 10:14

I have done similar When they have friends round (in their 60/70's mind), they stay up with classical music and loud laughing til 3 am sometimes. The next morning I'm up vacuuming and singing at 7 :D

Bramshott · 23/07/2008 10:16

It is rarely worth falling out with your neighbours, as you have to live with them.

I would park at least one car elsewhere if that's causing an issue for her, and see if that calms the situation down somewhat. Can your DH park round the corner so that you can park outside with your DS?

Shannaratiger · 23/07/2008 10:18

I don't blame you I'd want to do the same thing. Humphrey is right though will it make it escalate, I think talking is the adult response to the situation.

mummypud · 23/07/2008 10:34

it is very depressing if you have nieghbours that are inconsiderate, our old upstairs lot were awful loud musuc at all hours when we were trying to sleep , we politly knocked on theier door but they never took any notice,
its ok phoning the police but we always felt that it was not a good idea as we dont live in a good area and it would be obvious we had rung them ,
now we have a young girl above us who goes clubbing till 3 am and then comes in drunk and talks loudly on her phone till 4 am or has freinds over , i take great delight at hoovering at 7 am when she does this , petty maybe but satisfying

Bumdiddley · 23/07/2008 10:38

Don't move into a house with no off street parking if you have two cars

hearnoevil · 23/07/2008 10:42

i actually enjoy my neighbbour parking wars. i find it gives me something to get really reall angry about irrationally and takes out all my anger so i am nicer to pretty much everyone else in my life and direct my frustrated anger at someone who i have no relationship with.

peanutbear · 23/07/2008 10:42

"blew her old witches hump right off her back" PMSL I love that phrase

YANBU I cant understand the parking wars game we had to play it a lot at our last house I used to just block people in so they had to come and ask me to move my car!!!!!

I gave up after a few weeks though because some of these older people are so much more devious

PollyFlinders · 23/07/2008 10:58

I would have done the same, and gone shopping for bigger speakers and more Russian opera the next day...

Humphrey is right though, maybe give it a few days and have a chat with her?

Original poster
nelix2000 · 23/07/2008 11:06

its not that i am playing a parking war at all....90% of the time one of our cars is parked elsewhere...its the fact that she states she is happy yo have quiet decent neighbours then allows this.

Ps have every intention of speaking to her when I see her next....I would not call the police for one incident but if it repeats....then yes it is an option..

yes perhaps I am a bit unreasonable but I am tired and entitled to act childlike once in a blue moon.....hell I have to be sensible all the rest of the time!

LOL hearnoevil!

Bumdiddley i lived in this house before my dp moved in...so its irrelevant I think plus we do accomdate our neighbours by parking one car elsewhere(usually)

Peanut bear LOL.....glad you liked it...nice to know my education wasnt wasted! lol!!

thanks all for the replies....i knew it would be a mixed bunch.....have now moved my car......still think she is a vicious old bint however.......

OP posts:
mistlethrush · 23/07/2008 11:21

I find the Rite of Spring (Stravinsky) quite good for this sort of thing - quite introduction lulls any listens into a false sense of security, then all hell lets loose - ideally need bass turned up a bit for the full effect

Helsbels4 · 23/07/2008 11:22

No! YANBU!!! We used to have loud music and the like at all hours from our old neighbour and I had great delight banging on her bedroom wall at 7am with a hammer. Trouble is, she never seemed to sleep - maybe she was on drugs or something . We phoned the police in the middle of the night once and held out the phone for them to hear the noise but they said they couldn't do anything as it was a matter for Environmental Health . I think maybe you should try and have a chat and say you will take matters further if things don't improve. Good luck, nightmare neighbours are the pits.

PollyPentapeptide · 23/07/2008 13:19

I would hire a long stretch limo for the week plus a couple of builders skips and park all 3 outside her house

She must use up an awful lot of brain space if she is constantly trying to guard her parking space.

bethoo · 23/07/2008 13:24

what is is with older neighbours? i am having problems with mine! over a dog! miserable old bag!

poorbuthappy · 23/07/2008 13:57

YANBU - I am still amazed by the amount of people who actually think the police will resolve this issue!
If people don't care about playing hip hop until 3am in the morning then they aren't going to care about a community policeman calling round for a chat!

As for not moving into a house without off road parking if you have 2 cars?
How about not moving into a house without off road parking if you have 1 car and are so completely anal about parking?

I had family in Portsmouth for a while and some people in their street used to do the "Bread family" thing of getting out the cones when a car drove away! Everyone else just used to move them and pop them over their front wall...used to make me laugh a lot!

Squirdle · 23/07/2008 14:06

Hmm, it's quite possible that she didn't like the previous owners of your house because they got annoyed with her behaviour!

YANBU. My neighbours will often stay up late in the garden, loud music, friends over, hysterical laughing until 3 in the morning. Thankfully the 2 smaller DS's are at the fron tof the house, but DS1 (14) is right next to their garden and despite him shutting his window very loudly at times, they don't quieten down. I will be having words if this continues when he is taking his GCSE's as they don't seem to care if it is a school night or not. I haven't said anything yet as I don't really wnat to fall out with them, but with that, their pickyness about how many cars are on the driveway (huge shared drive - though they have had 3 cars there and a skip for a while now and their downright bullying son) it probably win't be long before I make a comment

I can't just hoover/play music loudly etc as the houses are detached, but I may mow the lawn at 7 in the morning after one night Or i could get DS1 to play his electric guitar

Squirdle · 23/07/2008 14:09

But our neighbour in our previous house in London used to have her TV on very loud! Trouble was she was very elderly and quite deaf. She was always asking if it was too loud but I didn't have the heart to say it was. It wasn't her fault! She didn't play hip hop though ...I'd have said something then!

Fimbo · 23/07/2008 14:13

We have new neighbours who think it is the automatic right of their friends to park right outside our front door. My dc sleep at the front and were constantly being woken by people chatting and car doors slamming at 3/4am in the morning. They have a double car port to put their own cars in, at the weekend they had a party, did they put their cars in their carport, no, they blocked the whole street.

I am so peed off with it, I have stuck plants in front of my front door so they can't park there.

I don't care if anyone thinks I am petty or not, my dc come first.

wotulookinat · 23/07/2008 14:28

I would have done the same, albeit petty! For years, when a neighbour has played music loudly late at night I have returned with loud music early in the morning. It may be petty, and it may not help in the long run, but it sur emakes you feel better

Berryred · 23/07/2008 14:44

love it yanbu

PollyPentapeptide · 23/07/2008 15:17

"Don't move into a house with no off street parking if you have two cars"

Are you quite insane Bumdiddley??? Oh and loving the after that one!

hearnoevil · 23/07/2008 15:24

"We have new neighbours who think it is the automatic right of their friends to park right outside our front door."

are they parking in your driveway or on a public road?
if it's a public road then they do have an automatic right to park in any public parking space once they have paid their road tax.the fact that it's outside your front door is of no relevance.

Fimbo · 23/07/2008 15:27

That's all very well hearnoevil, but my other neighbour can't get passed with her pram when they do.

I knew someone would come on here and quote that line at me. I don't care, my pots are out there and there will be no more parking in front of my door.