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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think rewarding children like this for Y6 SATS results is way over the top

74 replies

StellaDallas · 16/07/2008 21:22

DD1's class got their SATs results yesterday. Her's were very good, we were proud of her and told her so.
She came home from school today and informed me that many of her classmates got lavish presents for their results. One got £50, one got £75, one got a Wii, one is being taken to Paris...
I said - well in our family it doesn't work that way. She looked a bit glum...
Are we mean?

OP posts:

IdrisTheDragon · 16/07/2008 21:24

Not at all mean

I remember once getting £1 for a good report. And the lack of presents for exams didn't stop me from performing extremely well throughout the rest of my educational career.

SorenLorensen · 16/07/2008 21:24

No - just sensible. Blimey, if that's what they are getting for Year 6 SATs what will they get for GCSEs, A levels, degrees?

Ds1 will get a hug and be grateful for it

spicemonster · 16/07/2008 21:24

No. What are they going to do when their kids do well in their GCSEs? A Levels? Degree? Plasma screen? Car? Trip to the moon?!

SorenLorensen · 16/07/2008 21:24

Not that we've had our results yet...

ravenAK · 16/07/2008 21:28

It's madness.

SATs are not supposed to test kids!

SATs are intended to beat up evaluate teachers.

By all means, a treat for end of a successful school year, but not linked specifically to SATs results. They should be barely noticed by year 6 students...

myredcardigan · 16/07/2008 21:32

YANBU nor are you mean but if it was me, I'd probably go out to the cinema or something as a family and let her choose the film. Something small but family orientated like that would make her feel good. The whole family having a good time because of her effort rather than her achievement.

Big gifts like you mentioned are way over the top.
Well done your DD,too!

TheRealPhartiphukborlz · 16/07/2008 21:34

i would try (if remember) to give money for a good report. that's all.

roisin · 16/07/2008 21:35

Looks like there are advantages in SATs result delays - no time to discuss such parental largesse with their mates!

ds1 (11) has already been complaining that he is the only one in his class who doesn't have a games console (Wii, X-box or Playstation) and he's the only one who doesn't have a mobile. He's gearing up the persuasive techniques with the aim of talking us round by Christmas! If he got wind that some children get a Wii for SATs results he'd go wild.

SorenLorensen · 16/07/2008 21:37

Ds1 thinks you automatically get a mobile when you go to secondary school - like a rite of passage. I may give him mine - I've had it for 6 years so I doubt it has much by way of street-cred (or muggability).

mrswoolf · 16/07/2008 21:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gobbledigook · 16/07/2008 21:44

No you are not mean - you are sensible.

One mother I know has offered her ds an X-Box for good SATs results....this is year 2 though, the boy is 7. Utter, utter madness.

Original poster

StellaDallas · 16/07/2008 21:45

It is DD1's 11th birthday next week and she is having a meal at Pizza Express with her friends AND her birthday present is a mobile phone (although I freely admit that she is the last of her friends to get one) so I don't think she need feel too hard done by.
Maybe there was a sense of anticlimax a bit about her results - she already got all 5s at the end of Yr 5 so she may have felt we didn't see her results as a big deal. But we praised her a lot for working hard this year, because we know that she did work hard at all sorts of things.

OP posts:

Original poster

StellaDallas · 16/07/2008 21:46

Gobbledigook
Apart from anything else what a lot of unfair pressure to put on a seven year old.

OP posts:

heronsfly · 16/07/2008 21:51

My dd2 got her sats results today they were very good indeed,she got a cuddle,kiss and a well done,then she forgot about them,no presents at our school as far as I know.
But, I must admit she is getting a mobile before sept probably a mid range one,posh enough to be cool,but not so over the top that it invites theft.
In my defence she is going to school 10 miles away on a train,so as mch for my peace of mind as hers

mysteryfairy · 16/07/2008 22:18

When my DS1 moved junior school in Y6 he moved to a school where they actually got class positions at the end of every term. At Xmas he came first and again at easter. This peeved the child who had been used to coming first in previous years and apparently his parents even more because at the start of the summer term DS1 annouced that if said child beat him in the class positions he would be getting a plasma screen TV for his room... DS1 still came first, although I felt he could have struck some sort of deal with the other boy as he wasn't on any promise from me for his results!

toobusymum · 16/07/2008 22:24

YANBU. My dd told me the other day that one of the girls in her class has been promised - wait for it- £1000 - and her ears pierced if she passes the 11+. If she doesn't pass she gets - nothing. Fortunately dd is disgusted at such blatant bribery, and just as well, too.

OrmIrian · 16/07/2008 22:30

]]DS#1 got a brand new skateboard deck just for 'trying hard' in his SATS! OK, not quite in the trip to Paris league but still. He got it when he finished his SATs though because we knew, and his teacher confirmed, that he had worked exceptionally hard. I wanted to award effort rather than acheivement.

As it happened he did well . And his report was wonderful too.

bramblebooks · 16/07/2008 22:32

strewth! Thanks for this thread. DS1 got his sats results today and his tooth also fell out. Double whammy - must tiptoe upstairs now and put tuppence under his pillow.

(and take him to gamesworkshop for a couple of little figures on Sat)

Blandmum · 16/07/2008 22:33

shit a brick, If my kids do well in school we go out for a celebratory meal!

toobusymum · 16/07/2008 22:36

Here too, MB. In fact we will be going out for a celebratory meal whether dd passes or not. Surely as ormirian says, its about effort not achievement.

AbbeyA · 16/07/2008 22:36

I hate bribery for any exam. I have always just told my DSs to do their best. We might have a small celebration afterwards, but only in way of a special meal. Bribing for 11+ and then not getting anything if they fail is dreadful!

Blandmum · 16/07/2008 22:38

well quite. I count 'doing well' in school as trying hard and being nice to be around, rather than paper qualifications.

unknownrebelbang · 16/07/2008 22:38

One of DS2's friends is having an iphone and a fancy new tv because she got two 5s.

DS2 will get a treat because he has worked extremely hard this last few months and his results far exceeded everyone's expectations, but we prefer a small treat and taking them out for a family meal.

But then I had a Kool and the Gang lp for passing my O levels...

myredcardigan · 16/07/2008 22:41

Yes, as I said, a family meal is nice because then the child feels good because the whole family are benefitting due to their effort. So much nicer than expensive gifts. And large sums of money are just tacky!

myredcardigan · 16/07/2008 22:43

Personally, as a teacher and a mum, I don't think we rate being nice as highly as we should. I'd choose my child growing up to be happy and nice over academic success any day.

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