OK so these people are not on the min wage and are not poorly educated so please tell me why they can be so

[2shoes]

bloody stupid.
dd's sw rang. we have to have a reveiw about respite. now I was told september. but she says no it is next Tuesday. I said sorry no can do. dd braeks up wednesday so all shopping ect has to be done monday and tuesday.
oh she says, well dd has respite in the holidays can we have the meeting then?

ffs so she wants me to go to a meeting to discuss respite. and waste respite
she even acted suprised when I said no.
I then tried to explain that respite is supposed to be a break for me.
excuse me while I scream
so aibu in thinking she is being a bit

no, of course YANBU

silly cow! You did right to stick to your guns

just a bit unthinking I guess

daft bint

yanbu. it's called respite for a reason....duh!!!

so do you think it is ok for me tp refuse?

YANBU at all but the sw is. I would go as far to say that it hints at an attitude on her behalf that respite is some sort of favour iyswim. She has clearly either got the dates wrong or someone at her end has failed to communicate to you properly. I would be outraged at the lack of apology for messing you about.

you'll be shopping all day on mon and Tues? I don't get that bit. It sounds like someone's trying to r arange a meeting but I sense there's history to this that doesn't come across in the op.

it sounds very inefficient if they have got the dates so wrong - you were expecting September and we're only in july! However I think I would have accepted Tuesday since your dd will be at school that day, and the meeting would be I'd guess no more than 2 or 3 hours at most? Would you really be shopping ALL of Monday and Tuesday?

However they should not be suggesting you have meetings during your respite, of course not!

Sometimes it isn't worth cutting your nose off to spite your face but then I obviously don't know your situation. Where are you at now with it all?

As for suggesting meetings during respite, maybe they thought it would be easier for you as the children will already be being looked after?

itati, I can see why it would seem tempting to have a meeting when the children are cared for but respite should be what it says; respite. It is time for the parent/carer to have a BREAK which would otherwise be completely impossible....social services meetings don't count as a relaxing break, in my book!

I agree. I was just suggesting why they might have suggested it for then.

Bloody sw are a pain in the bum. I am having problems with them assessing my Mum - they have told me that it will take 6-8 weeks - for goodness sake, she is 87, she might not last that long. I hope she does but she needs help now - I am run ragged!!

Hey 2shoes, YANBU at all- I hate setting up these meetings too: half the time I clear precious time only to be told at the last minute that the other person is off sick or they show up late if at all...I was looking into a few hours help a week to give me a chance to catch up with my post, bills etc, then told all about a very hassly Direct Payment scheme that I'd have to manage a new bank account for...FFS I can't cope with the one I've got!!
I was going to also say, just because someone is on the minimum wage doesn't make them stupid - I'm on minimum wage myself, but because of the hours and flexibility due to my dd's condition. However, looking at my last paragraph, nothing I've said has proved you wrong on that, lol!