Time passing

[Celer]

I’m in my mid sixties and whilst generally very happy, can have occasional intense moments of deep poignant sadness that my years of pure vitality, excitement and emotional intensity are largely behind me. I can only be grateful that I had them: career ups and downs, lovers, newborn babies, precious children, broken relationships and new ones, moments of excruciating pain and pleasure. Life is nice and calm now, steady, pretty humdrum… which is good.

AIBU to say to younger women - embrace those feelings, experience those intense moments - your relationships, your babies, your partner, everything your life offers you and enjoy every minute you can. Allow the bad moments to pass as time does. Be kind to yourself, always. You really are worth it.

I wish I’d been a bit nicer to me.

I feel much the same way. I miss my vitality and the breadth of emotions which can bring immense happiness and sadness but I did at least feel alive and relevant.

Thank you, you made a big difference to my day :)

Ahh that’s so lovely OP! I’ll take your words on board

thank you, I honestly cannot believe how fast time had passed the last year, so much has happened and honestly its unsettling how fast my babies are have grown!!

That is really interesting. I know exactly what you mean OP, but I would say the opposite.

I would tell younger me not to worry about all the wild emotions and broken hearts, there is wonderful peace in your future and you can put all of that tedious drama behind you.

Isn’t it funny how different we all are!

I listened to a lovely podcast yesterday called Life Changing on BBC Sounds. The episode was a woman in her 70s being interviewed about how she decided to travel on a motorbike when she was 50 (I think) and her story made me feel so positive about the future and the possibilities it might hold.

This thread warms my heart 😊

Yep, with you. I'm happy that the intensity of my emotions have calmed down. Suicidal thoughts get replaced by "well, I will die soon enough". And despair of not being good enough is now a shrug of shoulders. Anxiety replaced by emotional numbness. For those having lived happy lives I get that you find this depressing but to me it's liberating. I'm 47 and I wouldn't want to be in my twenties again. So for all you younger people in despair- it gets better.

I'll be 70 next year and I just cannot believe it! It just crept up on me unnoticed.

I must have led a very boring life (I didn't, to the standards of the time!), but I feel more or less the same now, notice no big difference. Still have similar energy levels, well not quite, but not so bad that I notice too much.

I will acknowledge one thing, I don't know where the years have gone and the years left are flying by relentlessly. That's one thing I do notice compared to when I was say in my 50s, and I'm not sure why that is. Closer to the grim reaper maybe and don't want to think about it, but it's hurtling down the road anyway....

So like others, embrace the good and the not so good. It's life warts and all. When I look back now, I miss those I have lost along the way of course, but generally speaking I remember with snorts of laughter the good memories, those things that were enjoyable, and push away the not so good bits. I hope that's the same for others.

Onwards and upwards.

Thank you for this. I turned 40 this week. In some ways I have terrible feelings of regret that my twenties were wasted on me. And I’ve just had a traumatic couple of years. I’m trying to look forward now and I am excited at what life has to throw at me. Getting older has made me stronger emotionally. I am looking forward to my new confidence and resilience I gain with age and I want to embrace some new experiences.