AIBU by being upset about this confrontation about my puppy?

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Sorry if this isn’t the usual post on here, just wondering if anyone can related or has any thoughts! So, I’m a bit shaken. I‘ve just taken my puppy for a walk and she has had some looser bowels today after she disagreed with a type of treat we’ve been giving her. When I took her on a walk earlier, she unexpectedly just went to the toilet right outside someone’s gate. Normally, I walk her through the fields or on the trail but with it being dark i’ve felt safer going through streets with street lights. I got my poo bag out and started picking it up.

As I was doing so, a car arrived just next to me where an older lady (I’d say about 75-80) got out the car where she’d been dropped off. Obviously I felt awkward and when she saw me she snapped “don’t let it mess in my gate!”. I was a bit taken aback so I said “sorry, what?” she then repeated it again but with a swear word or two. I was a bit shocked and said “I always clean it up. I’m so sorry, she normally doesnt go near gates”. She then replied “Yes but I don’t like it!” She was shouting which really threw me off, I think it was partly as I was already having a bad day and this happened. I then apologised again while she was walking to her door and clarified that I don’t encourage her to do that but she is a puppy and has been poorly. She then jist shook her head and slammed the door at me.

So, I want to clarify two things: 1. The mess wasn’t actually inside her drive, it was right outside. I don’t let any of my two dogs inside people’s property or garden. 2. I completely understand not wanting dog mess by your gate and that’s a reasonable request. But I would think most people would understand that dogs can be unpredictable and not be so hostile? 3. I know some people can be particular about their homes and surroundings and I do appreciate that. I have anxiety and I think that is partly what triggered me so much.
I know she could have just had some bad news and reacted in that way, or had some anger about something else. But I feel awful that I upset someone and at the same time a bit annoyed that I was spoken to like this.

Has anyone had anything similar happen with their puppy, and AIBU for thinking this could have been handled better?

for what it’s worth -

I pick up after my dog
i have been caught short and ran out of poo bags 4 times in my dog owning years - twice I have knocked on doors and asked for absolutely anything suitable to use, once I went back home and grabbed a bag and returned, and once I was lucky enough to be near a bin, so used a receipt o found on the floor to pick it up and put it straight in the bin
when my dog was sick on a pavement I called my partner and he came to where I was with a watering can so we could wash it away
i don’t let him stop and sniff at bins or recycling tubs - I don’t want to give him the chance to wee on them
i don’t care if he poos in the garden
I don’t take him on walks just so he can poo - I take him because it’s the absolute bare minimum!
I curse dirty dog owners when I have to dodge poo too
i don’t let him go to the toilet on someone’s property

I DO let him shit wherever he pleases as long as it’s outside and in a public area, and I won’t apologise for that.

If that bothers you, I could not care less.
There’s lots of things people do in public that I don’t like, I just deal with it. That’s life.

Thanks so much for this! Absolutely you can tell most of the thread is non-dog people but it has been very amusing 😅

No it isn't! In fact the OP rather labours the point.

Exactly the same thing happened to me when mine was a pup except for a woman came out of her house and shouted at me. The poo was not easy to pick up and I only had one bag! Luckily I only lived a minute away and went home and got a bowl of hot soapy water and my yard brush . You just can’t help where they go ! I wouldn’t worry

I'm a dog owner and still get annoyed when someone lets their dog poo right outside my gate. Particularly as some people don't pick it up unless they see they are being watched. Also, my dog is an adult so I generally have some notice he is needing to 'go' and can direct him to a less sensitive location.

Should have slung the bag at her door after she slammed it, see how she likes that

At her age she has no right to say anything. She should just be grateful you didn’t just let the dog shit on her door step….. OP-why on earth is her age relevant???

It's nothing to do with dog owners for me. It's the lack of empathy for her - you said you have anxiety and her response was triggering to you. Yet people here are calling her a crazy bat - how do you know here anxiety wasn't triggered by having someone at her front gate cleaning up dog shit, and that she has other issues meaning her reaction wasn't great.

I’m absolutely a pro dog person. I am,however, also an anti agism person.

Some people love to bitch and moan.
I would offer you a container of water to flush it away if i was that demented..

Makes her more likely to be dealing with chronic illness in some form, whether her own or that of a loved one. More likely to be bereaved. More likely to have dementia. More likely to have no shits left to give about the feelings of random strangers.

We don't actually know whether her age is relevant, but it's more likely than not.

Just leave the dog poo next time op. Make no attempt to pick it up. Damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

People get irate over dog poo because some people just leave it and it's really frustrating.
A while ago I was walking my dog and he did his business, I picked it up. A man chased me down two streets later, yelling at me that his kid had seen my dog shit on his lawn. I was waving the poo in the bag saying I had picked it up he couldn't hear me as he was too far away and he continued yelling about how my dog had shat and I was yelling that I picked it up while holding up the bag! Quite the scene.
Anyway I was a bit annoyed for a while, but now when out walking I see so much shit on people's lawns including that mans and I do feel sorry for them having to continually pick up poo from other people's dogs. I'd be pissed too.

Your dog will make some people anxious just by it's existence in public space. When you decide to own a dog, you are accepting it as a fact of life.

It is actually quite logical, as dogs are impredictable (especially dogs one doesn't know), messy (peeing & pooing outside), and some of them dangerous.

Some anxious people will react in an impredictable way.

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If you see how openly nasty some reactions here are (crazy bat, leave it at her doors), it just illustrates that many people will have some experience with bad dog owners.

It's rude to stand over someone.. so yeah, it seems you would start off being rude. At least keep an eye from a discreet distance and act like a normal respectful human being like you probably would in any other circumstance.

I don't need someone to police my dog-owning responsibilities and will pick the shit up anyway. But I'll likely do it a bit slower if some dick was standing there scrutinising my actions.

Honestly, dog poo is incredibly disgusting and a huge problem in our area, so I can't blame her, even if I would have just tutted to myself instead of shouting.

Dogs like kids like people don’t always do what we want and some people overreact to that. I feel unsettled by these interactions too but other peoples behaviour is not within our control and so sometimes they will react too aggressively over what are small things in life - it’s not a big issue no one is dying, and mercifully she’s not an important person in your life that you need to suffer regularly. In those moments I am grateful for my softer and kinder disposition, I wouldn’t want to be so irritated by little things (and when I am as we all get frustrated from time to time) it makes my life worse.

@DetectiveDouche

If I happen to be coming home whilst someone's dog is shitting outside my house (as was the situation in the OP) then I am going to wait for them to clean it up. So yes I would be essentially standing over you. It's a turn of phrase.

Sadly I don't usually see the culprits to tackle them though.

It's shockingly bad in the area I live in. This thread is full of responsible dog owners, and everyone in RL say they clean up after their dog but where does it all come from?

Serious question - why can't people who live in urban areas train their dogs to not go in the middle of the pavement? It must take 3 seconds to move the dog from middle pavement into or closer to the kerb?

Thanks for calling me a dick based on 3 emojis. As it goes yes, I probably would stand pretty close if the poo was literally on the threshold to my property, as it is in the OP, so that it was actually on the route I was taking to get to my own house. Stand at a distance from my own house like a lemon, at the age of 75-80, because there’s someone else’s dog’s diarrhoea on my threshold and I need to be respectful to the dog owner? Well you’re entitled to your opinion I suppose….