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Does anyone else not have a career?

67 replies

Moonpig37 · Yesterday 19:42

Not everyone but most people I know seem to have an identity as such- "I'm a teacher", "I'm a nurse" "I'm a graphic designer" and so on, cue lots of conversation about how interesting that must be, what they specialise in and so on.

I've worked in a few different sectors and tended to move after a couple of years, I'm currently in a role I'm happy with, hopefully I'll stay a bit longer. I've never had a 'path' as such though. Has anyone else had this?

I feel like in the UK your work plays a big role in your identity, and it's seen as impressive and stable to have worked your way up in an industry to a senior role. I don't know if that will ever be me, I'm trying to be ok with it.

OP posts:
AutumnOakTree · Yesterday 19:46

No, never had a career either. After uni, fell into a couple of jobs because there was nothing much around due to a recession, but not career jobs. Was an SAHM for a few years, then had jobs that fitted around the kids. Some were vaguely related to my pre-children job, but no such career or profession as such. Nothing to do with my degree either!

heydudettes · Yesterday 19:46

You should be working to live not living to work. So as long as you’ve enough money earned to enjoy your life how you wish to then your working life doesn’t matter.

NotAnotherScarf · Yesterday 19:48

I know hundreds of people who have jobs not careers. No one I grew up around apart from the local insurance broker had one.

I had one for 20 then ditched it.

I even went on a stag do and one of the jokes on the back of the one of the lads shirt was "proper job" in that he was the only one who had a job where if he didn't go back on the Monday he'd be sacked. The rest would get a bollocking, docked pay or just get another job when they decided to get home.

I retired at 55 with money in the bank and most of my mates are also retired or have cut back at about the same age

flowertoday · Yesterday 19:50

I have a career on paper as I have a profession . I have hopped around in it though between areas / specialities. Not interested in management particularly and easily get bored/ stuck and shift again.
You are definitely not being unreasonable. Work takes up so much time. So much better to stay nimble and interested than stay in one role or industry.
I agree people set alot of store by their jobs / careers. Much driven by modern capitalism and the enduring stronghold of the British class system I suspect. Nurses and cleaners are 💯 more valuable than politicians in terms of their contribution but that is not recognised.

Needmorelego · Yesterday 19:50

I used to work in retail.
It wasn't my career....it was my job.
I really don't want my legacy to be "retail worker". I'd rather be remembered for other parts of my life.
I hate that people's identity often defaults to their job - like on TV quiz shows ("This is Bob....a dental nurse from Barnsley").
My identity is more than that.

fansblowing · Yesterday 19:51

I do have a ‘career’ and have worked my way through the ranks but I’m really aware of the ‘what do you do’ question which is nearly always the first thing people ask when they meet strangers….as though that somehow defines us. Two of my closest friends are in roles they now enjoy but one friend in particular hates that question with a passion because when she says ‘I work in a shop’ she almost feels she should apologise for somehow not making some kind of invisible ‘grade’. So yes, I get it and I agree with you completely.

Moonpig37 · Yesterday 19:51

Thank you for your answers. It's about not comparing myself to people and trying not to feel awkward when it comes up in group conversations.

OP posts:
Moonpig37 · Yesterday 19:54

If someone said 'I work in Tesco', there wouldn't be much enthusiasm or interest and I doubt people would be impressed unless it was a high-up role like Area Manager or something.
If someone said they're a teacher it'll be- what year? What subjects? Primary or secondary?
I was considered as intelligent in school, achieved good grades and went to uni, people seemed to expect me to do 'better' but I need to learn to live for myself and stop caring.

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Oakyoaktree · Yesterday 20:00

no, I work part time in a very low paid role despite having postgraduate qualifications - the price you pay for having disabled children when they can't access children, spend years out of education etc. It bothered me when I was younger - I felt like a total failure to say I have a little admin job but I am into my 50s now and couldn't care less what people think.

RoseyLentil · Yesterday 20:02

I’ve worked at different roles within the same sector. Is that a career?
I don’t have a degree but my colleagues all have them.

Samanabanana · Yesterday 20:07

I work in the area I have a degree in (marketing) but I never had a glitzy career. I always feel bad for not making more of my professional life and definitely could do with earning more, especially in this economy. But it is what it is and this job has allowed me to be present for my kids, so it's swings and roundabouts I suppose!

mamaof4losingmymind · Yesterday 20:10

I've always had jobs never a career it just doesn't interest me aslong as my bills are paid and we have a little left over thats good enough for me. I don't see work as an important part off my life its what I have to do to keep a roof over our heads

Cruftsrecommended · Yesterday 20:11

I’ve done lots of different jobs.
My career, or lack of, doesn’t define me.
If people ask ‘what do you do’ I’ll say ‘at the moment I’m’ and quickly begin talking about my interests rather than listing all the jobs I’ve had.

NotAnotherScarf · Yesterday 20:11

Moonpig37 · Yesterday 19:54

If someone said 'I work in Tesco', there wouldn't be much enthusiasm or interest and I doubt people would be impressed unless it was a high-up role like Area Manager or something.
If someone said they're a teacher it'll be- what year? What subjects? Primary or secondary?
I was considered as intelligent in school, achieved good grades and went to uni, people seemed to expect me to do 'better' but I need to learn to live for myself and stop caring.

Yes you do. I have mates who were bin men, plumbers, parks department employees who are interesting, highly intelligent and great company. One loves music and we can talk bands for ages..he is in his 70s and often the lads will give him a pile of coins to curate the juke box for us in the pub.

I am a member of a FB group and there's a woman who due to lifestyle and situation in life, I'm sure is often overlooked in "real" life...crap phrase but you know what I mean. She is brilliant, interesting and highly artistic. Her artwork is breathtaking. She has a lot of different views and experiences of life but I always look out for her posts.

Aliencrispsandolives · Yesterday 20:19

My chosen career is really interesting but I hate being asked what I do when I’m not at work. Dh is the same.
I am not my job.

Maomee · Yesterday 20:25

You're probably quite working class. Basically that means you do most of the graft the country fundamentally relies on and generates most of the wealth while a few of us have job 'titles' that make us feel slightly better than the actual grafters.

Nevermissabeat · Yesterday 20:31

I just do admin. I'm pretty good at it though. Old enough to be confident on the phones, check data and finance details and respond to a billion email enquiries. (Without using any AI at all and always sense checking them).

Oakyoaktree · Yesterday 20:34

Moonpig37 · Yesterday 19:54

If someone said 'I work in Tesco', there wouldn't be much enthusiasm or interest and I doubt people would be impressed unless it was a high-up role like Area Manager or something.
If someone said they're a teacher it'll be- what year? What subjects? Primary or secondary?
I was considered as intelligent in school, achieved good grades and went to uni, people seemed to expect me to do 'better' but I need to learn to live for myself and stop caring.

This says more about you and your biases towards others in roles which are commonly seen as not very prestigious

I could think of a lot of questions to ask someone who says they work in Tesco (and have done so many times).

PinkBuffalo · Yesterday 20:35

No career for me either. I been in the police for nearly 20 years as a civilian but if someone give me a million pounds I would no go in Monday. It literally a job (I does do to the best of my ability) that pays the bills and I can work part time at

Moonpig37 · Yesterday 20:38

Oakyoaktree · Yesterday 20:34

This says more about you and your biases towards others in roles which are commonly seen as not very prestigious

I could think of a lot of questions to ask someone who says they work in Tesco (and have done so many times).

I don't think there is anything at all wrong with Tesco, and the staff there are likely earning more than I am. I'm just talking from experience that people haven't shown a lot of interest in jobs they don't deem as important, just the same as they get excited over shiny new expensive cars and not older ones.

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ohmaaaan · Yesterday 20:40

I am a teacher but definitely not a career teacher!

SquirrelGG · Yesterday 20:41

I never had a career. I worked in office jobs from 16 - 59 then took voluntary redundancy and signed on with a temp agency. The jobs I had then, described as "labouring" I enjoyed so much more than the boring office jobs. I never wanted a career, not for a minute.
Millions of people don't have careers and are perfectly happy.

Pachycephalosaurus · Yesterday 20:41

I don't think it's how 'important' the job is which inspires questions; it's how interesting it is.

What do you do?

"I work in banking for prestigious company X."
oh right .

"I'm a grave digger."
Wow, really? I have so many questions...

SupernaturalAddict · Yesterday 20:43

@Moonpig37 like you i was bright in education, went to uni (AI/ comp sci) but decided to apply to work as cabin crew a couple of decades ago. Loved it but gave it up when I had children with the intention to go back when they were at school. Life happens and my youngest who is now an adult is severely disabled. I never went back, I couldn't.

I'll never have a career now but I have done things that have mattered to others. I volunteered writing reports that other parents could use to draft appeals, this mattered to others. My son thrived and my other children benefited having me at home.

Life may not play out how you want but that doesn't mean that you aren't somebody of substance without a career.

Papyrophile · Yesterday 20:43

Sorry to derail the thread, but I loved work. I was a copywriter, degree qualified in Political Science and able to write (for money obviously) about anything. I went to work every single morning and relished the fun.

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