To wonder why people used to marry so young

[estrella167532839]

In 1990 the average age for getting married was 24. I know couples who got married when they were 21/22 and had only just graduated from uni. I can’t imagine being married that young.

At the moment, it seems like most people get married in their 30s, if at all.

25 for me, still together. It didn't seem young at all. I had lived away from family since I was 18 and been independent since then.

DH and I were living together at 22 and we married at 35 then had kids my grandmother 5 years in said. “ i said a prayer to Saint Anne for you last night “ St Anne, Saint Anne find her a man “ I have a man Gran , well says she hes not feckin MARRYING YOU. 😂 gran was married at 18 and all 9 kids she had early 20’s

Whatever one thinks, living together was really not the thing probably before the late 80s/early 90s. Why would a girl move in with her boyfriend when it was only him who got the benefits, i.e. housekeeper, cleaner, sex on tap? No benefit to the woman!

Lots of people left school at 16 in those days. When I was at school you could leave at the Easter if you had already turned 16.

I was a few months shy of 21 when I got married in 1987.

we'd bought a house the year before that - mortgage free since 2012

i retired at 50

i agree with pp - more financially secure at a younger age because of it

I actually think marrying ‘younger’ (under 30) is lovely and while I haven’t done it myself, I wish I had! There’s something about a younger couple getting married and settling down which isn’t really the same later on. Gives you more time to make the big decisions about houses and kids, and not rush things.

I dislike this sneering at people who settle down younger. I often wonder if there’s a touch of jealousy to it.

This is an interesting discussion on the subject https://www.campop.geog.cam.ac.uk/blog/2024/07/11/what-age-did-people-marry/

You were in the right place at the right time. 1975 was the first year a woman could open a bank account or get a mortgage without a male signatory.

Until 1982 they could still refuse to serve you in a pub purely because you were a woman. They really were different times.

I mean why wait till all the good men are taken or till the first round of divorces that come with baggage 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

Take your change love forever or get a second chance when everyone else only taking their first shot.

Also much more likely to actually have children when you want them if you’re not still only looking for Mr right in your early 30’s.

Getting a mortgage as a single woman was hard back then, although not impossible. I remember Barclays refusing to give my friend a loan for her business unless her husband signed the loan agreement.

In years gone by young people, as soon as they left school, were expected to get jobs in the adult world. They werent infantilised like today's young people. They joined the adult world of work, grew up, fell in love, stayed with parents till they got married, saved up a deposit to buy a house. The expectations were different back then. Youngsters were expected to (and did) mature earlier, married earlier and had families earlier

People started working earlier, less went to university, still less did MScs or PhDs. Basically in 1990, a 24 year old had been functioning as an adult for 8 to 6 years, not 2 or 3 years.

Gobbolino and Sootica! Just read your user name. Loved those books! Always sad for Gobbolino not being accepted.

And shows that the average age of marriage was above 25 until the 1750s, dropped in the post-war period, and is now rising.

What the Dickens?

Landlines, the post, trains, cars or actually walking up a path and knocking on a front door.

It wasn't all fields before 1992.

My sister had a baby out of wedlock on 1989 and it was pretty frowned upon. The midwife made horrid comments and people acted like she should be ashamed. There was a huge amount of single mother panic.

I think about that time it started to become more and more acceptabl to live togerher not married, but obviously the older generations were more opinionated still.

Yes this was a big difference.mi was shocked when I first met someone who had not worked full time until 23 years old because they were studying.
If you leave school at 16, and go into full time work, getting married in your twenties does not seem young. I mean you could be working full time for ten years before getting married

I got married in 1990 aged 25. I did it because my boyfriends job was transferred overseas. We lived together and his employer would only pay for total expenses etc if we were actually married.

Some of my friends got married at uni and a few age 23.

Living together wasn’t taboo, but having a child unmarried was still something most women tried to avoid.

It was a phrase I will grant you but mainly for the older generation who liked to huff and puff. My age never saw it that way.

Same in my parents' time. They were engaged for three years, so by the time the wedding night came... no wonder my Dad is smiling in the wedding photos.

I got married at 23 in the 1980s because I'd met my husband and knew I wanted to be with him forever. 45 years later I'm still glad we didn't wait any longer.

They got married in early adulthood so they could build a life together and have children during their most fertile years. It's not rocket science.

Because sex outside marriage was deeply frowned upon and nice girls didn’t.
This only really started changing in the 80s and 90s.
When my parents were first married in the early 1970s it was hard to get the Pill or book a hotel room together unless you were married.

Yes, same in and around the large village where I grew up. Certainly my parents and their friends were quite judgy about people living together before marriage during that time period. (They did eventually chill out about it all, but just took a while to catch up with the way the modern world was heading).

Sure, but the PP they were replying to was trying to make out we couldn’t get bank accounts in the 1990s, which is obviously nonsense.