AIBU to be furious at DS15 over his behaviour and holiday footwear choices?

[TheZanyPanda]

We’ve just landed in Florida for a week-long family holiday. There’s me, DH, DS13 and DS15. We spent a fortune before we came out getting everyone kitted out with new clothes and brand-new trainers—including a lovely pair of Nike Dunks for DS15.

We picked out his travel outfit together: hoodie, baggy joggers, and his box-fresh Dunks with classic white Nike socks. Looked great.

Fast forward to checking into the hotel last night. DS15 is sitting on the armchair, his joggers ride up, and I notice... no socks. (He spent all summer going sockless in old knackered Vans and Astro turf boots which I didn't mind because they were already ruined, but still!). Anyway, I went into their room later and it absolutely reeked. Turns out he wore his brand-new Dunks with no socks for the entire journey here! 🤢

This morning, before heading to the theme parks, we wanted a family photo. DH and DS13 look great in fresh shorts and new trainers with ankle socks. DS15? Sockless again.

I gently pointed out that:

1. He’s going to get horrific blisters in the Florida heat.
2. He’s going to completely ruin his new Dunks in days.
3. The trainer smell is already vile.

He kicked off in front of everyone, telling me to "grow up," "get a life," and "what’s it got to do with me?!"

Later, I popped back to the room for suncream and thought I'd take him a pair of trainer socks just in case. Had a quick nosey in his suitcase... there are literally zero socks in his entire bag. He has actively planned and packed to go sockless for the whole week.

DH says to leave him to it, but we are the ones sharing a room and hire car with his melting, stinking feet! AIBU to be furious with his behaviour and choices!

Say nothing but keep a can of air freshener to spray when you have to share small spaces with him. I agree with others its not really a major issue just an annoyance but equally if I had to regularly put up with someone's smelly feet and I had already told them and they did nothing about it then I would be spraying the air freshener round them. If he complains thats offensive then you can retaliate its not as offensive as you having to smell his feet and accept that he dont care. If he finds the air freshener offensive only he can do something about that. You find his smelly feet offensive so you are doing something about that. He cant have it both ways x

If the no socks thing bothers you stop buying branded clothes. He thinks it matters because you think it matters. It’s completely unnecessary to spend so much money on clothes

I can't imagine getting worked up about any of this. Outward presentation seems to mean a lot to you, so on those grounds you are not being unreasonable.

I hate to use a cliche and I hate to sound dismissive of your concerns OP but this has to be the most first world problem if there ever was one. Get some odour eaters for his trainers and some socks. I think they have shops in Florida?

buy sone anti vac spray, spray his shoes when he takes them off....

Of all the things that he could be doing, this isn't a massive issue.

I’m with you. Athletes foot a gogo 🤢🤢

Surely a wind up

I think possibly not.

Op get a grip! Take a big big step back. I imagine he feels humiliated and embarrassed.

"Furious" seems an overreaction?

You live: you learn.

they sell socks in America

This thread socks

My mum was not the best but Jesus Christ at least she wasn’t losing it over us not wearing socks 🤣 she didn’t give a sh*t what we wore when we were 15. He is old enough to make his own clothing choices. Buy shoe deodorant for the smell. Who cares if he has socks on in a photo 🙄

Pick your battles and enjoy your holiday. All an over reaction and a bit controlling. He told you he didn’t want to wear any and you still went looking for some in his case.

Well, then it will teach the OP a lesson about not spending a fortune on buying the entire family new clothes before they go on holiday. I mean, they’re going to theme parks, not the front row at Milan Fashion Week. It doesn’t matter what they wear.

You're in Florida. Lots of people don't wear socks with their sneakers and shoes.

Think Miami Vice.

Get the anti odor spray and let him be.

So your in Florida, came on mumsnet to complain about your sons feet and that your furious. Get a hold of yourself woman. If your furious about this then I feel sorry for your kids growing up. If this is how you carry on your doing a good job and not seeing them much when they grow up and get girlfriends they tend to lean towards the girls family side anyway.. bet he'll be pleased aswel

I’ve gone away to Poland and realised first night there I’d forgotten my underwear and socks bag. I’ve got some more now lol but could he have forgotten. Also what do you mean you agree outfits?

Now is the time to allow your son to experience natural consequences of his actions. You don't need to be furious. A can of air freshener for in the car if it gets whiffy, otherwise let him crack on.

You are a helicopter parent with a side fleet of attack drones. Chill the f out. Wow. You've stressed me out and I have socks on! Distract yourself with a quick look online for boot bananas and also that trainer spray you apply upside down that has opposing nozzles - larger one for the main foot space, shorter one points towards the heel of the shoe.

Also wtf did I just read about planning outfits. Dear Lord. 🙄

I think I stopped telling my kids what to wear a lot earlier than 15 years! They have enough of their life controlled by others so having some personal choice (even if it seems foolish or “wrong”) is a good way to help them get the confidence to make choices inlife and learn from those decisions. Also you are lucky to have teenagers who agree to family photos as neither of mine were happy to participate at that particular age!

I'm with him. I'm a lot older than 15 & never wear socks with trainers. Also, 'travel outfits'? What?

My teens will only consent to photos with the understanding that they will not be posted on socials (not sure why this is even in question as I don’t post anyway). They agree to me sending to individual friends. For example I was allowed to send prom photo to my individual friends on WhatsApp (but Facebook was a no).

I can't imagine a world where I'd have so little to worry about that this problem would be one I'd have to take to a forum of strangers on the internet. I really can't. Imagine being on a lovely family holiday and acting like this.

This made me laugh but hes not a child he can have sex smoke and get married soon, put his shoes outside or on the bslcony and he washes his feet when he gets up and when he goes to bed, hes 15 you cant dictate what he wears

You sound a tad overbearing. No wonder your son is pulling this crap if you’re pouncing on him for this and whatever else. Probably feels smothered and frustrated. I have a 15 year old. I wouldn’t be having an argument over socks. He can make his bed and lie in it. If he needs socks, you can smile and tell him you told him so and get him to buy socks himself. You sound more concerned about picture quality and how everyone looks, this isn’t important for a lot of people. My son dresses in black all the time. He never wears what I think would suit him but he’s not a toddler to dress anymore and I leave him be. If he goes anywhere looking a state, that’s on him, not me.