AIBU to have low periods when I should be grateful?

[Handlepop]

I’m 30, happily married. We tried for years and years to have kids and we had to go multiple IVF rounds and then we were blessed with our twin boys, who are now 2.

They are very hard work. I work 2-3 days a week and they go to nursery those days. I sometimes feel low but I have so much to be grateful for: healthy husband and kids and family; cozy home with a small mortgage left; financial stability; good savings; a job that pays both of us really well.

I sometimes wake up with a low mood and nothing really to look forward to.

Do any other parents ever feel like this? How do you tackle it?

Sounds like depression. Have you had episodes like this before?

What do you think would make it better of you could write the script? A more fulfilling job? More friends? Better relationships with family? Once you identify that you can start working out how to get there.

Happiness is not a permanent state of being, there’s always ebs and flows. Are you content overall?

I find my mood plummets when I'm not sleeping well, and I am generally exhausted. A good life, and maintaining it, can be incredibly hard work and exhausting sometimes.

I do have very difficult circumstances though, but I also count my blessings knowing they can be a lot worse, and if I am tired, this doesn't always work. I think modern parenting is just very exhausting and can make you feel down.

Going through IVF must be very emotionally draining. I'm sure you must feel blessed, but if your kids are hard work, they are hard work! You've also had the added stress of going through IVF to get there before even becoming parents. That is more stress than most other parents.

It sounds like you are doing great and you just need some time for yourself.

OP this is really normal, I think it's more common when your fertility journey has been difficult because of the feeling that you should be grateful after all the time spent longing for what you have now. The reality is that two 2 year olds can be very tricky and it's completely normal to sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed! Can you carve out some time for yourself? It sounds like you need a break.