To be worried my teen son won’t grow any more?

[Tradversionok]

He’s not far off 16 and he’s 5ft 6. We are not a family of giants, he’s not shaving or anything, and he’s a late bloomer (grew 6 inches in 14 months) - but I still worry that’s it. No more in the tank. I guess I can’t know.

I worry because I can see him internalise it, brush it off but get upset by it and compare himself to his friends. And I just want him to feel good about himself. To feel confident and to find a girlfriend and feel good about that side of his life (when he’s ready etc)

obviously I boost him all the time. I think he’s wonderful and tell him. I’ve just come here to voice my anxieties.

My son had delayed puberty. It was diagnosed via an endocrinologist. A big part of what they look at is ball size and pubic hair. If you’re concerned asked your GP for a referral.

Male here, at 16 I was probably 5’6 and the smallest of our group and didn’t need shaving, by 18/19 I was 5’10 and shaving and taller than 75% of them as they had peaked early. I wouldn't worry too much.

Male here, at 16 I was probably 5’6 and the smallest of our group and didn’t need shaving, by 18/19 I was 5’10 and shaving and taller than 75% of them as they had already peaked. I wouldn't worry too much.

People are weird. A weird woman always tells me that my son and I are midgets. Im 5 foot fucking 3!

I'm a 5 foot 6 man. Looking back (though perhaps not very far down) there are advantages. Men don't see you as a challenge and pick fights with you. It's easier not to accidentally come across as a threat. I think that if you're friendly it's easier for that friendliness to come across. I don't mean to sound like some kind of hobbit. The effects are slight, but I think they're definitely there. As I've got older I've noticed that my height seems to be less and less something people notice compared to other things about me.

The worse thing than actual height is having a complex about it but I'm afraid I'm glad I'm not a short young man now. I think it was a disadvantage when I was dating, which was generally way easier back then. Thanks to wretched social media and everything being on an app here's so much more focus on looks now, and so much more focus on really quite extreme means to correct your looks to what you want it to be and, in the middle of that, short people must remain short. So, OP, be both kind and careful.

Oh- and a thing that always gets missed in these discussions. There's a difference between being short and, say, stocky and just being small. It's harder being the latter as well as short.

I have this fear too, OP. I am short, my husband is 5'11, son about 5'6 tops and he is 16 and while not shaving, definitely could - has a bumfluff goatee. He's never had a growth spurt, just gradually got taller from 11/12 onwards.

I think he's lovely just the way he is, I just worry the rest of the world is a bit cruel. I don't want him to feel disadvantaged. I suppose only time will tell whether this is it for him, or whether he'll keep going until 18.

You're actually absolutely bang on average - 5'3" is average height for a woman in the UK.

I am the same, it doesn't feel like it does it?! 😂 Why do I feel like such a short arse??

From what I can see online average height for women in UK was 5ft 3 a couple of decades ago but now it’s 5ft 4 so either way yeah I’m not extremely short! 😅

It may fly in the face of social messaging but a good life lesson to learn as early as possible is that social messaging is bullshit, and not even remotely reflective of what people will find attractive.
For whatever reason it's more socially acceptable for rude people to go on and on, out loud and in public, about how they could never find short men or fat women attractive - in a way they'd never discuss, say, racial preferences. (Every poster who's taken the time on this thread to explain how they find short men unattractive is one of those rude people.)

@gannett
I get the general sentiment and I don’t like the way people speak about short men either, but I just wanted to say I’ve heard lots of people say they don’t date for example - East Asian men! They may not be able to say it quite as freely or say it on TV, but it does get said in many public/social or even some work settings.

Although recently I saw on the Dutch version of Love is Blind a man said he couldn’t date a “fully Black” girl. Plot twist : He is now engaged to her which is just weird but yeah it’s a thing.

And even when it’s not openly said it can still come across very strongly. Eg young men on dating shows who look the POC woman dead in the eyes and tell her they only date blondes 😂

Maybe it was less so when you met your DH but there does seem to be a lot of pressure on young men to be tall these days.

If everyone was tall, tall would be average! Only 50% of people can be taller than average.

Unfortunately 99% of MN users' sons seem to fall into this group... 😂

I would focus on supporting him to have a healthy self esteem that isn't tied to his height. Height is just one aspect of what makes a person, and it really shouldn't matter how tall he is. It's a shame that you both seem to consider being 5'6 as something to worry about.

Mike Myers?

Wayne's World Mike Myers? Austin Powers Mike Myers? Shrek Mike Myers?

Is that supposed to be the contemporary standard for an attractive man? Mike Myers?