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Regret career change and I don't know what to do

26 replies

Nottodaybob · Yesterday 16:27

About 4 years ago I changed careers - I previously worked in the public sector in a protected job title role. I changed 4 years ago to work in tech. I really regret it. I'm so bored, I get no job satisfaction and I'm just really disinterested in my work. I changed companies last year in the hope that would help but it hasn't. It's a good job, a great company to work for and a good manager and team but I'm just getting nothing out of it. I'm told I'm good at the role but I dread every day.

I left my previous career for lots of reasons, but mainly because DH encouraged me to (in a positive way).

I don't know what to do. I have maintained my registration in my previous career so could in theory go back to it but the issue is I am currently paid the FTE (I work 4 days at the moment) of £10k a year more than I would get in my old career AND I get an £8-£10k bonus each year. So, about £20k a year more. We can technically afford for me to go back, but it would mean DH picking up a bigger share of the bills than he already does (he's a high earner). Its also a less felxible career and I'd need to return full time as 80% contracts are like hens teeth and we certainly couldn't afford for me to go to fewer hours.

I just don't know what to do. DH is supportive regardless.

AIBU to consider returning to my old career?

OP posts:
ItsPickleRick · Yesterday 16:30

I suppose it depends why you left? It’s easy to look back with rose tinted glasses.

If it’s something like social work, is there a middle ground where you could become independent/work for yourself?

InveterateWineDrinker · Yesterday 16:31

Could you reduce your hours in the new career and pick up bank/agency work in the old one?

Timeforabiscuit · Yesterday 16:36

I returned, and because I had more varied experience I got paid more in a senior role.

You know you won't get the bonuses, but there is Flexi time and possibly pension or commute/home working to partly compensate.

Sometimes you do need to step away to appreciate what you actually value from work - and sometimes it's not about the pay, I really remember thinking I have a short time on this planet one way or another and I'll be damned if I'm wasting it on this corporate BS 😂. Public sector has problems, private sector has others IMO.

You also have the gift of a bit of time as you haven't got a redundancy forcing your hand.

Nottodaybob · Yesterday 16:49

Thanks.

I left because I didn't like the direction it was going in but that's started to reverse now. I got an offer to change career I was unlikely to get again so took it.

I was already quite senior so unlikely to get paid more if I'm honest.

I can't reduce hours in current role.

People in real life either think I'm mad to return or stupid not to! No one in the middle

Current job is almost exclusively WFH, pays much better, is really flexible and only 4 days a week.

Returning would be a pay cut, less flexibility, mostly work place based and full time!

On paper it's a no brainer 🤣

OP posts:
CraftyNavySeal · Yesterday 16:55

Is your tech job at risk of being replaced by AI?

I retrained in tech 8 years ago and I’m bored out my mind of it now, but it’s well paid and WFH so I’m going to wait until I’m replaced, get my redundancy money and then retrain again.

If you might be replaced it makes sense to get out whilst you still have your old professional registration.

IzzyLeng · Yesterday 17:02

What sort of tech role? Is there a different area you could move into which might be better?

Mirroredclock · Yesterday 17:28

It could the WFH that is a bit demotivating? Can you work from an office/other location a bit ?

5289843DM · Yesterday 17:31

Is there a job role which uses both your previous and new tech skills?
If we have an idea of your previous job, there might be alternatives/fusion roles.
I didn't re-train, but moved to a vastly different role within a healthcare role. I moved up quickly and the pay was amazing, but stressful!

Long story short, I returned to doing a much lower paid bank role for a period of time and ended up taking a full time role earning almost £20,000 less than the better job. I've worked my way back up, I'm no where near as stressed and earning the same as I was before. Admittedly that was 10yrs ago now but I don't miss the stress and have a much better work/life balance.

Delphiniumandlupins · Yesterday 17:36

How much longer do you expect to be working? I think happiness is worth more than money and it sounds like you'll be fine financially whatever. I'd put up with boredom for a few years to achieve early retirement, see kids through uni or similar but not as a permanent situation.

Nottodaybob · Yesterday 17:48

Delphiniumandlupins · Yesterday 17:36

How much longer do you expect to be working? I think happiness is worth more than money and it sounds like you'll be fine financially whatever. I'd put up with boredom for a few years to achieve early retirement, see kids through uni or similar but not as a permanent situation.

20 years, give or take.

Unlikely to be replaced by AO

OP posts:
Ablian · Yesterday 17:56

"I dread every day." stuck out to me. That's a lot to carry year in, year oit., when you have another option that (I'm sure) you are also good at and you think would be more rewarding.

WFH doesn't work for everyone. Maybe you're just someone who would be happier seeing colleagues more IRL.

The first reply questioning why you left in the first place was an excellent point, but you have a good answer to it.

Nottodaybob · Yesterday 19:51

I'm not sure if it's the WFH or not. I do have an office, but it's literally empty except for our 1 day a fortnight we all go in.

OP posts:
AdidasBadidas · Yesterday 20:02

WFH can get very dull. If you had the same job but you had to go in twice a week to a busy office and interact in person- would you be happier? Only you can decide.

CaramelGhost · Yesterday 20:05

Absolutely, go back to your old career. Dreading going to work is a one-way ticket to burnout IMO. Life is too short to hate your job

Minasama · Yesterday 20:07

Yanbu. This is a really difficult conundrum and much depends on how much you need the money (about £13K after tax I guess?)

SpidermanZoflora · Yesterday 20:09

Can I have your current job lol

Nottodaybob · Yesterday 20:17

Minasama · Yesterday 20:07

Yanbu. This is a really difficult conundrum and much depends on how much you need the money (about £13K after tax I guess?)

I don't think we need the money. We have a very decent emergency fund plus a few other savings, and a mortgage is our only debt. We currently meet our bills (including things like saving towards Christmas and those annual expenses like the MOT and other car maintenance experience, so they don't come out of savings unless they're really excessive) we put aside for the kids and for their day to day but not regular expenses like clothes and shoes. So have loads of little pots for all that stuff. And then we save about £1-£2k a month between us on top of all that. So a pay cut for me wouldn't be that big of a deal. And because I'd be moving from a lot of higher rate to mostly basic rate tax, the difference isn't as big as it might be.

OP posts:
OrlandointheWilderness · Yesterday 20:21

You get one life. Don’t spend the majority of it dreading every day.

EmeraldRoulette · Yesterday 20:22

To me, the biggest questions are

  1. how busy are you? There is nothing worse than that combination of being so busy that you’re highly stressed and yet you’re bored at the same time.

  2. why did you leave the previous role (apart from your DH encouraging you?)

if you’re going to say that you have an easy-going quiet work at home job, there is no way I would give that up. Even if it is boring. You may be different, but if that’s what it is, it’s practically the holy Grail.

Nottodaybob · Yesterday 20:55

EmeraldRoulette · Yesterday 20:22

To me, the biggest questions are

  1. how busy are you? There is nothing worse than that combination of being so busy that you’re highly stressed and yet you’re bored at the same time.

  2. why did you leave the previous role (apart from your DH encouraging you?)

if you’re going to say that you have an easy-going quiet work at home job, there is no way I would give that up. Even if it is boring. You may be different, but if that’s what it is, it’s practically the holy Grail.

I could be busy, but I seriously lack motivation. It's not because I don't have stuff to do, or because I'm WFH, I'm not different in the office, except I have meetings in person rather than via teams. If I were interested, I could be really motivated and give a lot to the job, but I'm not, so I'm doing the minimum.

I left because I wanted to reduce my hours and they only agreed after I handed in my notice, I was becoming frustrated with the direction it was going, which was down to management and public policy, both of which have changed significantly in the last 4 years and are heading much more in to the direction they were in in my first few years. I suspect there is some rose tinted glasses, but recently I've been providing advice in the area on an informal capacity and it has struck me how engaged and motivated I am by it.

OP posts:
FedUpCelery · Yesterday 20:57

Job satisfaction Vs more time and more money.

Could you do something with your 3 days per week that makes it feel more worthwhile? More trips away?

Pepperama · Yesterday 21:14

I’d switch back or try find a third option that’s got more of the things that fire you up. I can’t imagine working in a job that doesn’t feel meaningful to me long term. Of course there are always days that aren’t ideal, but on the whole it’s important to most of us to know that what we do makes a difference or else we enjoy most of the tasks.

I’d rather have less ££ as long as it’s enough to cover a decent enough lifestyle. I did two internships for two deadly dull jobs and thought ‘the days feel like they go on forever’.

EmeraldRoulette · Yesterday 22:02

@Nottodaybob So what does doing the minimum look like? Have you got a lot of free time in your day where you can do other stuff that you’d be more interested in?

Max247 · Yesterday 22:11

I wouldn't take a 20k pay cut and longer hours lightly - who knows when things may change and your old dream job becomes an AI monitored hell overnight.

If you can manage, then save even more and look for hobbies / voluntary work and then early retirement when you can afford.

Leonoraeyre · Yesterday 22:12

You left the first career so you must have been dissatisfied in some way. I don't think going back is necessarily the answer. Maybe you should think about something new.