AIBU to feel frustrated about manager's repeated maternity leave?

[ShesPregnantAgain]

My manager, let's call her Betty, has just announced her fifth pregnancy. I've enthusiastically congratulated her but I'm actually pissed off. She's barely been at work for the past 7 years. She gets pregnant, that makes her ill so she's off for most of her pregnancy, then 9 months on maternity leave, comes back and a few months later does it all again.

The job she used to do doesn't really exist any more. The company's moved on: all the people, systems and expectations are different. They get in maternity cover for her every time so someone gets trained up, actually does a good job, does a handover when she comes back and then leaves. It's so disruptive.

I know the company can't fire her for pregnancy-related sickness or for taking maternity leave per her statutory rights. They can't even performance manage her because she's never here long enough, or appoint one of her covers to do the job permanently. None of us can work for promotion to her level because that would discriminate against her. Her manager does promote people out sideways and upwards but she's just there, filling the role without actually doing anything. We all just get on without her.

I know that women, me included, benefit from these protections because of the crap women suffered in the past. I just think she's taking the piss.

What is altruistic about causing so much disruption in your workplace and for your work colleagues, as we need to increase birth rate this should be supported by the government not businesses

We had someone like your manager. Back to back maternity and back to back pregnancy related sickness, so she was never in the office once she announced at 12 weeks she was pregnant again (usually a week or two after returning to work) and as as soon as she did that, she was off sick again.

For starters - if she’s too ill to work during her pregnancy, then your employer can start her mat leave early (unless rules have since changed), it’s for her and the baby’s wellbeing.

Then for the two remaining managers, their roles need to change and incorporate aspects that your manager doesn’t do to make the roles different enough that your manager’s role can be made redundant.

Employers will also need to enforce the requirements that she’s working in the office and doing the travel she’s supposed to. They have to make it clear it’s not acceptable to use wfh as a form of childcare.

Also when she’s on mat leave, they should be making use of KIT days and informing her what’s different eg new systems, processes etc, in order to try and reduce disruptions when she’s back.

Good luck, it’s always a few that take the piss and give pregnant women and. Others a bad name. Unfortunately this is why some employers are cautious about hiring women of child bearing age.

I am a woman we have out own business
This is one reason I do not employ women of child bearing age

An employer giving her the flexibility to WFH doesn't mean she has the right to have the children at home under her care while she works.

If she is looking after 3 kids while she works the employer could and should pull her up about it. She should be 100% focussed on work for the full day

So you employ no women from basically working age 16/18 to 45 as although rarer still possible... So basically you severely limit your hiring pool to basically men.

How do you think your customers arrive on this world.... By being born.

Honestly utterly ridiculous.

She’s not getting equal rights, shes getting extra rights.

Last I checked the goverment do pay maternity pay and maternity rights are enshirned in law which is also the goverment really. In Australia where they take raising the birth rate seriously- they hold a job open for 7 years....

I was in the same kind of position with a colleague years ago, three pregnancies - always ill, one time even got pregnant again before she was due to come back off mat leave, special permission to WFH, no other person in the dept was allowed, then went "flexible hours" to accommodate all the young children so she would often do hours at night which was a fat lot of use when we needed to discuss work with her in the day, I worked there 5 years, I only saw her in the flesh three times and one of those was the work Xmas do! Again new systems came in and she was working the old ones. We could never speak to her direct and it was very detrimental to the team, this was proved as we had some wonderful temp covers in the office that covered her on her mat leaves and life was so much easier with them than dealing with her mainly via emails she would send a reply at night.

Because they can’t get pregnant.
Why don’t you focus on your career rather than taking digs at someone? It’s pathetic and it doesn’t help anyone.

so you're frustrated bc another woman is... choosing to have lots of kids? I get that its disruptive or whatever but she's hardly doing it on purpose to skip work so your anger is a little misplaced

as we need to increase birth rate this should be supported by the government not businesses

'Supported by the government' means 'supported by taxpayers'.

I agree with the OP.

Two pregnancies - fine.

Five pregnancies, particularly in such quick succession - royally taking the piss

The point is the man would not be off with pregnancy related sickness nor paternity leave.

It's the role that gets made redundant, not the person.

Yes i do

@AlexandraCarrington I know that but we are reliant on future workforce to pay those taxes and support pensions going forward , I do think somebody taking maternity leave for repeated pregnancies back to back is taking the piss and shouldn’t be funded by the employer or government. Tackling the falling birth rate shouldn’t be by abusing already generous maternity leave benefits.

What is your occupational sick pay and maternity pay like?

Absolutely mad that someone would be signing her off for that long, multiple times.

Your organisation sounds useless at managing her.

Ok what is your plan ? If not generous maternity benefits and parental or family leave ?

Maybe there should be a cap on maternity leaves - say you get it for the first two, but anymore and it’s unpaid leave and you fund it yourself?

There was a woman who had 3 pregnancies in a row but came in to sit promotion interviews on each mat leave. Got the promo despite doing fuck all for 3 years

That would be an entire ethical issue

I know of 4 men who have taken 6 months paternity leave. I don't know why I know so many because it is still pretty rare. Maybe it is because I work in teaching.

Abusive men would be big fans of that idea.

@Neurodiversitydoctor , I’m not disputing that maternity benefits should be available but an individual who for each pregnancy has been absent from work not only for their maternity leave but also had sick leave throughout their pregnancy should not be lauded for taking repeated episodes of maternity leave one after the other. My career was as a manager of a clinical service for the NHS and the employer needs to be able to provide that service which becomes nigh on impossible in a situation like this when you are not allowed to or able to recruit cover for maternity leave

That is absolutely appalling!!
Surely she should have to keep up to date on current practice - attending training and so forth.
Does the company not have a WFH policy especially regarding having childcare in place whilst they work?
They could restructure and manage her out - reducing to 2 managers. All 3 managers have to apply for the remaining 2 jobs. All are interviewed and the strongest 2 are chosen. Questions about office based working and travel should help to demonstrate that she is no longer able to do the job! As long as the process is completely done by the book, it should work. Someone just has to have the balls to do it.
Whilst I completely agree that maternity protections need to be in place, 'misuse' of it needs addressing as well. This lady is clearly abusing the system and causing a lot of disruption to the department. She's not doing the job she's being paid to do whilst taking all the benefits she can!!