AIBU to reconsider a long friendship over support for education tax?

[CoconutRumcake]

A close friend of over 15 years last night unashamedly said she supported the children’s education tax. To put this in context, she is godmother to my ds and has seen first hand what damage this has done to children and families as well as her own sister losing her job when the school closed. She had maybe drank too much and has apologised over text this morning, but I really can’t shake the feeling that I don’t want to be around her.
AIBU -try and move past it
YANBU -it’s run it’s time

I never get into politics or views on stuff like this with my friends, it just isn't worth it. I'm sorry this has impacted your child though, it can't be easy and maybe that's why you're overreacting because to think of ending a fifteen year good friendship over this is an overreaction - whatever happened to repairing things.

I speak as someone who was very sad to see the closure of a private school in my town. I have to say though that it is only one aspect to the closure though - the soaring energy costs, rising minimum wage, cost of living crisis are all surely in the mix - the VAT was just the final straw.

It is a fact that the UK has caused private schools to start paying VAT which has increased the cost of private education of children leading to some parents not being able to afford private schools (or deciding it's not worth the money) and moving children to free state education As demand for private education has fallen some less well funded private schools have closed due to not having enough pupils and therefore not enough fees coming in to be viable.

This

The only tangible benefit of Brexit. The UK can add VAT to private school fees.

If I was your friend, I’d be telling you and your WhatsApp friend group where to go for being shamed into apologising for a pretty inconsequential and mainstream opinion. It would be like falling out with a friend over their opinion on stamp duty or pension reform. You’re acting like her opinion is akin to advocating for the removal of votes for women. It’s not exactly a controversial or extreme position. She’s not even saying private schools shouldn’t exist, just that they shouldn’t have charity status.

The school closed, I no longer have that option. I take it as personal attack on children coming from a place of spite and backward mentality. Describing not paying tax on children’s education as a loophole is akin to describing not paying tax on breathing air as a loophole. The argument of whether educating children is a benefit to all society was settled a 1000 years ago, we don’t need to go over it again,

NO. It is not OP.
Are you bored this morning or just totally unhinged? Or you’ve fallen out with your “WhatsApp friends” so chatting here instead- I’m sure they are delighted for a morning off from your blinkered drivel.

In my circles being against vat on private schools would be the thing considered "wtf is wrong with you".

Are you going to tell her she's "thick and spiteful" and that's why you're not going to be friends with her any more?

And presumably you don't care about kids who don't get to buy a better education?

No it's not. The school is a business.

And also people are considered failures all day long for having debt and financial problems. I'm shamed regularly for being on disability benefits and the press/online arseholes call me a scrounging liar every moment of the day. So yeah if you don't think poor people already are treated with contempt then you are very very fortunate.

And private school is a choice. Lots of people think the system is elitist and damaging to society. They wish for more equal opportunities in education and a higher standard of state provision. It doesn't mean they wish individuals harm or wish schools to fail.

It’s akin to advocating for the removal of education options for children.
She didn’t say they shouldn’t have charity status, she says she agreed with the education tax. There is no link between charity status and the education tax paid by the children at all.

How many times... these are not only rich people being affected.
If you want rich people to pay more tax, address that through PAYE or whatever else.

Plenty of parents with average incomes are now paying VAT on providing their child with an education that is a better fit for them than their local state school. If you think that's reasonable you're entitled to that opinion. But please stop mischaracterising us as rich people who can easily afford it!

What would be the alternative to "breathing air"? There is none - so it's not a luxury and so would not be subject to VAT.
However, there is an alternative to private education, that is not taxed. I refer back to my previous answers - despite agreeing with @Goatsarebest that this thread is likely just for rage bait.

Parents on average incomes aren't paying for private school. And if they are, its because their income isn't their only source of wealth.

I'll give it a go because I have a nice cup of tea in front of me.
The tax you reference is VAT that applies to all relevant educational provision and is not a new 'tax on education'. This tax applies to all business and service providers that aren't exempt. One exemption is a charity.
The majority of private education claimed to be a charity so had exemption from paying it. Note the word exemption.
This exemption has been removed because they aren't actually charities. So now they pay the same as other education providers and businesses.
So they are not being taxed as private schools or to provide private education.
They just don't have an exemption from the tax every other relevant service and education provision has to pay.
If you think all education provision should be exempt from VAT, that's a different debate.

Got it now.
Great.

Honestly, it’s not a tax on all education. Repeating this ad infinitum is making you look very stupid. It’s like saying that because people have to pay VAT on caviar and chocolate that is a “tax on food” whereas other food like bread, milk, fresh fruit, vegetables, and meat are all 0% rated and people could choose to eat those instead.

Some schools are businesses who pay corporation tax and some are lovely non profit organisations who exists solely to provide education to children (the utter b@stards). It is a choice you are correct, a choice that has been removed for lots of families. Your comment reveals the malice behind hurting other people’s children because you are unhappy with your life.

But all children in the UK are eligible to be educated for free. Obviously the money comes from somewhere but it’s free at the point of access.

Why should those who choose to ignore that system and make money out of it not be taxed? What am I missing?!

It is like trying to explain something to an inanimate object.

🙄Nothing to do with private schools being charities. VAT on education is illegal under EU law. Brexit keeps on giving though..

I promise you that my and my husband's income is our only source of wealth.
You could choose not to believe me in order to feel more comfortable, but that's up to you.

Edit: I apologise I just googled the average UK household income for 2025 and we are a little above it, but not very much.

Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no “children’s education tax” - you make yourself look silly even calling it that.

It’s the removal of an unjustified exemption from a luxury service - free education exists for everyone, so there’s no need for anyone to purchase this.

Therefore it’s a luxury good/ service and should be subject to VAT.

It’s also something that is to the detriment of the country as a whole - removing some children from the same system as others and so the family’s participation and “stake” in the system - and so no reason for the government to encourage it was a tax break. If anything, it could have a higher rate of VAT to discourage the behaviour.

It’s ironic that right-leaning people are so against this, as they’re normally very in favour of VAT as a tax, with it being a regressive tax. The only world where having this VAT removed would be a good idea is where VAT as a whole was abolished, and everything rolled up into a higher income tax with progressive tax bands.

And no, you’re not paying twice, or subsidising other people’s children, any more than someone who never drives is subsidising the roads, some one who dies young is subsidising the pensions, etc.

If anything your friend could reevaluate her friendship with you but it sounds as though she’s risen above it.

With each ridiculous update @CoconutRumcakeyou are coming across as exactly the type of person you described in your last sentence.
Your friend has absolutely nothing to apologise for and you would be doing her a massive favour if you dropped this friendship. You sound like an entitled snob who is raging that private education is now being taxed.
Other options are available.