AIBU to reconsider a long friendship over support for education tax?

[CoconutRumcake]

A close friend of over 15 years last night unashamedly said she supported the children’s education tax. To put this in context, she is godmother to my ds and has seen first hand what damage this has done to children and families as well as her own sister losing her job when the school closed. She had maybe drank too much and has apologised over text this morning, but I really can’t shake the feeling that I don’t want to be around her.
AIBU -try and move past it
YANBU -it’s run it’s time

This is the point. Children’s education is not a luxury, I would obviously avoid people who think otherwise.

The 7% privately educated is nonsense too. 16-18% kids at 6th Form are privately educated.

And lets not forget the millions at state school who use private tutors. That's allowed it seems - but if gives people an unfair advantage that others can't afford. Terrible hypocrisy.

So access your right to tax funded education. Private education is not a necessity.

If children's education is not a luxury, then why should we have to pay money to get them a better education?

That is the definition of luxury.

I have actually begun to wonder whether the thread really is or ever was "about whether to remain in contact with someone who" you have a difference of opinion with, since your responses are almost entirely about arguing for your opinion (which I happen to largely agree with you on).
So what about this friend? Have you decided whether to continue, whether to change anything, or how to handle the friendship? Have you gained any insight at all on that subject? I'm genuinely interested.

Your choice to use private education and your choice to ditch a friend for having a different opinion.

This is true.

Given that I share the strength of the friends opinion, I would see the loss of OP as a friend as for the best.

Private schools always paid VAT since it came into force. Charitable status has nothing to do with the children paying tax on their education, children’s education was vat exempt (for obvious reasons) and now it’s not. Children's education is no longer tax free, private schools are not paying the education tax .,, the children (usually parents) are.

What point ? You’re talking as though state education provision doesn’t exist. Private education is a luxury only available to those privileged enough to be able to afford it. It’s not a necessity. Your friend is a realist - why would you want to avoid her ?

You missed out the word private.
It's private education that has been taxed.
I think it says a lot about somebody's character who cannot comprehend a differing opinion, accept it and move on.
I don't think you are getting the response you are seeking and that is your opinion to which you are entitled. See how it works?

It's not a question of not caring about kids who don't get to buy a "better" education. It's simply an honest acknowledgment that life is not completely fair.

Some children grow up in bigger houses, some children get fed better quality food or indeed properly fed, some parents take an active interest and encouragement in their children, some children are read to every night etc etc.

It's a very left wing notion that it is better to bring everyone down to the same level rather than increase standards if that results in inequalities.

There is a really good quote by Boetecker in 1916 titled "The Ten Cannots":

You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
You cannot help little men by tearing down big men.
You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich.
You cannot establish sound security on borrowed money.
You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn.
You cannot build character and courage by destroying men's initiative and independence.
And you cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they can and should do for themselves.

If someone genuinely cared about inequality then I strongly believe that there is a case for taxing or even banning private healthcare where the ability to fund and access healthcare more quickly than someone reliant on state provided healthcare can literally be life or death privilege.

It's a tax on choice OP it's not taxing children so stop trying to say otherwise, if you can't afford or want to pay it then it is a choice... your children can go to the local schools HTH 🙄

I have friends that disagree with private schools and it doesn't bother me in the slightest that they have a different opinion to me.

I did, however, distance myself from an old friend as she burst out laughing saying how funny it was that I would have to work even more hours or pull my son out who was in year 11. I hadn't been talking about it and was my own stress. It wasnt that she had a different opinion though it was her unkindness I had issue with.

I lost a friend over an opinion once , this thread has reminded me of it.

I was living in Ireland when the abortion referendum came in. At the time , Ireland was one of the few countries where abortion was not legal in europe. I wrote on social media that I felt we needed to have it, that we were behind other countries.

My good friend of 25 years, sent me messages saying that she didnt think she could be friends with me ever again. She was very religious and also had been adopted. she felt that if abortion had been in place, she would have been killed rather than adopted. It was an emotional topic. She was entitled to her opinion and I was entitled to mine. But it was a bad time.

She never spoke to me again. It was harsh. I never put a political opinion on social media again after that

You keep missing out the word ‘private’. Why is that ? And what are the ‘obvious’ reasons that private schools shouldn’t be subject to VAT ?

You are alright then, I doubt anyone thinks chidlren's education is luxury.

Private education on the other hand is a luxury.

Private education is a choice. The stars gas provided free education and if for whatever reason you choose to send your kids to private school which you have the right to do, why do you think you should get a discount on the fees which was pretty much what the VAT exemption was, a 20% discount on the fees

OP, with as much respect as I am able to muster, please educate yourself on this matter as you are making a total tit of yourself bandying about terms like "education tax".

Independant schools lost their VAT exempt status under the current government. They previously had this under the rather spurious pretence that they were charities. VAT is currently 20%. That is why independant school fees rose by that amount. Ironically the link you keep posting explains all of this.

Kindly, you are commenting on something that you apparently do not understand and making a laughing stock of yourself.

As for your friend's opinions, everyone I know, even those with kids at independent schools believes that fee paying schools losing their VAT exempt status, was morally correct as they are businesses NOT charities. I suspect the difference been you and your friend is she may actually understand what this policy is about.

And there is no such thing as "net" tax or a "net" tax payer. What are you actually on about? A person's salary is described as gross before deductions such as tax and NI are made and what is left is the net amount. Hope this helps.

In future engaging the brain before shooting off the mouth is usually a sensible approach I find, oh and also admitting when you're wrong or have misunderstood something rather than digging a deeper hole for yourself.

Do her a favour and stay away from her. It’s no loss for her. You sound very very dense and unable to grasp simple facts. Hopefully your kids will be educated to an higher standard. Also if you’re so rich that you could afford the VAT then surely you could have found an alternative private school? There’s still loads of them around.

Private schools were never exempt from VAT, you’re really in a muddle over this. Private schools aren’t paying any extra tax, the children are paying 20% tax on the education services they receive.

It’s incredibly frustrating reading people supporting such a harmful policy without even bothering to understand what it actually is.

You are definitely being unreasonable. People can have friends with different political opinions. Sometimes we can agree on a policy as a whole and still feel sympathy for people caught up in the decision on an individual basis. Social welfare tends to be one of these areas where most people agree it needs to not be made an easy lifestyle choice but we can feel sympathy for genuine cases that this makes it harder for.

And you continue to miss the point 😂

Private schools were treated as charitable organizations so the fees you pay was exempt from the 20% VAT making it cheaper for you.

This is separate from private schools paying VAT on things they buy. This is about how the charitable status makes it cheaper for parents by making it 20% cheaper to send your kids to private school and this has not been removed and you're now paying the true price without the discount.

OP - if you think that we don't understand, why don't you think that your friend doesn't understand, instead of thinking you will never speak to her again

No you are backward and spiteful for believing that education can only be provided by Private schools and that private schools are all education. Taxing the privileged few who can afford private school which is what is clearly said in the link you naively keep posting helps fund many much needed services including education for ALL. Poor little rich family’s being taxed for Private education. You’re poor friend I hope she finds some nicer caring friends.

Oh god. Please don't encourage the OP to homeschool. The lack of intelligence she has shown does not need to be passed down to the next generation.