Work stress and anxiety

[TheotherMrsSmith]

I’m a Band 7 operational manager in the NHS. My role has evolved over time and, if I’m honest, I haven’t had particularly clear job planning or much structured support around what my role should actually cover. I’ve gradually taken on more responsibility without feeling that I’ve had much guidance or development in the role. I’ve been asking for job planning and clarity but it constantly falls on deaf ears.

I’ve now been asked to develop a workforce consultation paper. I’ve never written one before and have largely developed it myself.
The paper has now come under scrutiny from HR, particularly around some of the financial and employment implications. There are also a couple of assumptions that now need revisiting because circumstances have changed.

The senior manager who was supposed to sponsor and support the work has had limited involvement and recently said she didn’t have the headspace to attend meetings about it despite some things needing progressing and clarity from her. I also sent work to HR several months ago for input but didn’t receive a response at the time.

I’m now being told that the VSM isn’t happy with the paper and that I’ve “misled” her. I have a meeting with the VSM, HR and the senior manager to go through it.
I’m trying to look at this objectively. I accept that there are things I could have done better, particularly as this is new territory for me. But I also feel I’ve been trying to do something quite complex without much senior direction or support.

The whole situation has really knocked my confidence and I’m questioning whether I’m actually capable of my role, rather than simply being inexperienced and under-supported.
For people with management/HR experience: am I being too hard on myself? Is this the sort of thing that would normally be picked apart and revised before consultation, or have I genuinely handled this badly?

You handled it to the best of your ability with zero support and training. It's hard to say what's going on here as, in my team, band 7 would not have been working on this at all. Our management is 8B and if I pick up extra bits of work I get all the support I ask for immediately.
I wouldn't know where to bloody start with workforce consultation paper!
The best you can do is prepare for the meeting with your objective points written down - no training, no job plan, management not engaging with the process etc. Take on feedback calmly but also make sure you highlight that there is a gap in your knowledge and how do they propose you have support in place to cover this gap. Turn it on them. Ask them who reviewed your paper months ago and why there was no feedback at that point. What plans are in place for your development. Who oversees your manager's involvement and ensured that they are invested in staff development. What training opportunities there are to ensure you are up to speed with your responsibilities. What ARE your responsibilities?!
Be calm but firm.

My only advise is to always put your side across in emails. So, calmly, professionally and without attributing any blame... You have probably already emailed them your draft to say you welcome all comments, feedback and guidance by x date. If they didn't have the headspace or didn't reply, that's on them.

Put your understanding of next steps and actions/by whom into writing after every meeting so everyone copied is clear and to keep yourself right. Brief and clear. Especially where you need someone else to take ownership of a decision. (it can be really stressful to be trying to manage your best and simultaneously/after the event accused for taking too much upon yourself - keep yourself right, keep a paper trail)