Furious with what happened to DS17 on his last day of work

[Workcomplaintt]

I have changed my name for this because posts on my normal account could give away the company involved.

DS (17) had his final day of a part time job today. He knew it was always a short term contract and he really enjoyed working there, it was his first proper job.

Upon picking him up today, he was absolutely covered head to toe in flour, eggs, milk and god knows what else. Apparently it’s tradition whenever someone leaves that they get tied up and humiliated by their colleagues. I could tell DS was shaken up, he said he didn’t know it was going to happen and he didn’t feel they’d listen if he asked them to stop.

He took off what clothes he could before getting in my car but it’s in a right state.

I am in two minds to turn up at the company tomorrow and give them a piece of my mind. I said as much to DS. He’s only 17 for goodness sake.

He has asked me not to say anything to them.

Would it be wrong of me to make an issue of this despite his wishes for me not to?

That’s not ‘tradition’, that’s assault. Your DS didn’t consent, he was tied up, and he was humiliated. That’s not banter, that’s a safeguarding issue, especially when he’s 17.

I completely understand why you’re furious. I would be too. But I also get why he doesn’t want you to go storming in; he’s young, embarrassed, and just wants it over with.

You don’t need to make a big dramatic scene, but you can calmly raise it with the company without causing fallout for him. A simple email saying you’re concerned about what happened, that he didn’t consent, and that you want reassurance this won’t happen to other young staff.

If they’re doing this to every leaver, it’s only a matter of time before someone gets hurt.

You’d be well within your rights to report it but you can choose the tone. It doesn’t have to be confrontational.

The issue isn’t the job ending. It’s the fact they tied up a minor and threw food at him

If he does need to get a reference he can tell them why it won't be a good one . Because he reported this into police . Can you imagine reading this in a newspaper. It's not your son that would look bad and even if the company was influencial who is going to want to have anything to do with them now .
But for now , calm down , talk it through and then decide with his input what you think should be done.

Can't believe they battered him.

From Companies House, I know the owner is in his 60’s!

Honestly - I don't get some of these replies. There's having a bit of a laugh - and taking it too far. This is a workplace. Would any of us be happy if this happened to us? I know I wouldn't. Not only is it unpleasant - it could give someone severe anxiety. Where do you draw the line on what's acceptable.

It’s not a police matter! MN classic.

Not surprised. A lot of them are brain dead in the trades, and before anyone starts, I include family members in the above evaluation. They would probably find that hilarious, except it really isn’t.

I have a 16 year old who thankfully does not want to enter a trade. I hate the culture of them, despite the earning potential.

Poor lad. I’d go fucking mental. They must have quickly realised that he was massively uncomfortable, unless they’re all psychopaths. I could never join in such humiliation of anyone, let alone a kid.

They used to do that at a restaurant where I had a summer job 20y ago. By some miracle they didn’t do it to me, I was super shy and a bit stuck up so I think they knew I would just be mortified.

@Workcomplaintt

I think you should respect your son’s wishes and not say anything to the company but definitely use it as a learning opportunity to discuss with him how some habits and traditions in the working world are inappropriate and awful.

He should aim to become one of those workers and in time managers who don’t turn around and say it’s my turn to humiliate the younger team members but someone who respects and looks after their colleagues.

Ignore anyone saying it’s normal and “do not report” I’d go in tomorrow and raise hell and demand for this to be escalated.

Ffs idiots.

This is not a bit of fun. This is actually gross misconduct. Anyway I have ever worked, you would be dismissed for this type of behaviour. It’s not the 1970’s anymore.

I worked in KFC as a student (almost 30 years ago) and that was commonplace. On my last day I was given the chance of escape by guessing heads or tails. Luckily I guessed right - I still remember how I scarpered out of there scared they would change their mind! 😱

It’s hard to imagine people get away with this shit. Good your son is out of there

Technically it is assault, so it would be perfectly reasonable to report it to the police. People have been arrested and prosecuted for doing similar.

Good idea
Most police forces are at a loose end at the moment

One of my younger relatives worked in a place where she was warned by a colleague of a stupid custom. Her workmates would gather around, sing a stupid song, and throw tea, coffee and food. She was leaving to go to uni and decided she was not interested in being humiliated.. She foiled them by simply staying away on her last day. I'm surprised other people don't think of this because once you have left you have left. The company can send any paperwork by mail.

Your “brain dead” family members are, fortunately, not representative of all men in trades.

My DH has a construction company and would be horrified if this was done to any of his lads. It is absolutely gross misconduct.

Your poor son OP, I hope he’s okay.

A lot of behaviour that was once considered acceptable is no longer tolerated - just watch any TV show from the 70s or 80s to see the blatant sexism, racism etc. that was so casually bandied about. This "tradition" smacks very much of that era - and should be left there. It has no place in modern-day society.

Will it be helpful to your son to have a reference from this place? If so, keep quiet.

The most messed up bit is how many people think this is ok. WTAF!

It’s ridiculous and childish but of course you can’t go storming in, especially when DS has said not to.

I worked in a multinational company once where at the Christmas party anyone new ‘had to’ have tequila poured in their mouth from a communal bottle and if they said no, squirty cream in their mouth face.
I remember taking the waiter to one side and saying I was pregnant (I wasn’t) so please pass me by.
I got the cold shoulder until the holidays. It was ridiculous.

This happened to me in the late 1980s - leaving my Saturday job during 6th form to go to Uni.
I wasn't tied up, and it wasn't filmed (no camera phones then thank god) and it didn't upset me. They just egg & floured me as I was walking out the door. I admit I found it funny, it was all done as a massive lark. Felt more sorry for the cleaners.
I'm surprised it's still done in this day and age tbh. Has he seen it done to other leaving employees?
I wouldn't do anything if he has asked you not to.

I’d actually phone the police this is abusive - if people don’t say anything this horrendous behaviour will carry on