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Original poster

Furious with what happened to DS17 on his last day of work

155 replies

Workcomplaintt · Yesterday 20:44

I have changed my name for this because posts on my normal account could give away the company involved.

DS (17) had his final day of a part time job today. He knew it was always a short term contract and he really enjoyed working there, it was his first proper job.

Upon picking him up today, he was absolutely covered head to toe in flour, eggs, milk and god knows what else. Apparently it’s tradition whenever someone leaves that they get tied up and humiliated by their colleagues. I could tell DS was shaken up, he said he didn’t know it was going to happen and he didn’t feel they’d listen if he asked them to stop.

He took off what clothes he could before getting in my car but it’s in a right state.

I am in two minds to turn up at the company tomorrow and give them a piece of my mind. I said as much to DS. He’s only 17 for goodness sake.

He has asked me not to say anything to them.

Would it be wrong of me to make an issue of this despite his wishes for me not to?

OP posts:
MissMoneyFairy · Yesterday 21:08

Dont go on but I'd report to head office if there is one. Its very childish, do they do it to everyone who leaves.

covilha · Yesterday 21:10

So, as he is under 18 then he is still a child. A child who has been physically assaulted and mentally degraded by a group of adults.
to me, this is a safeguarding red flag.
Hiven his age, his employer has a duty of care
Way back in the day there was a very well paying local employer where the girls were rumoured to treat brides to be like this. Even by the standards of those days I thought it was vile.
I thought all of this behaviour had been phased out

KittyMcCatface · Yesterday 21:12

It’s assault. Your son is a child. Of course he doesn’t want a fuss, but so do many children bullied and physically attacked. Be a parent. Take action.

GreenCaterpillarOnALeaf · Yesterday 21:12

Has happened to me at my first job. It was a pain but it was all in good fun and also I’d participated in doing it to other people who left so I couldn’t exactly be pissed. My mum however was fuming and made me clean my clothes and hoover and clean inside of the car. She was more angry about her car than anything though, and she did think it was “fucking silly”.

If it has really upset him he needs to go and sort it out himself. He needs to put in the complaint - he is almost an adult and if he has a problem he needs to deal with it. Mummy coming in fuming won’t help him in the slightest.

ApparentlyIsMyCircusAndMyMonkeys · Yesterday 21:12

I’d be inclined not to say anything for fear of embarrassing him further. But I will also offer another perspective while I’m here:

When I was in my late teens I had a temp job in a call centre office which was supposed to just be for one day but they ended up keeping me on for the summer. On the final day, I was pranked - not with flour, eggs etc, but things like my office chair was tampered with so when I sat down I suddenly plummeted to the floor. My headset had blue tack put in the ear so it blocked the sound, my mouse had the ball removed so it wouldn’t work etc. These were all done while I was being distracted in another room and then when I returned to my desk and the phones were ringing and no one else around to answer them, I had the trio of pranks hit just as I took a call from an angry customer (who was of course another colleague posing as a customer…). The office erupted into laughter at my expense. Was I embarrassed, yes! But also I was quite touched that they had considered me part of the team enough to have bothered to prank me. And once I realised that I found it very funny too. It was their way of saying goodbye and thanks.

Now I appreciate that none of this is like being covered in flour/eggs etc, and that if that came as a total surprise it could feel, well even threatening, perhaps? But I just wonder whether this is a long standing tradition they have, and instead of trying to completely humiliate him, they actually were trying to include him in a last day ritual? One that arguably should probably have died off years ago. But still, perhaps they were trying to make it fun? You said he enjoyed working there, so presumably they enjoyed having him there too.

Or they could of course just be total bellends. Either way, I wouldn’t take it further. Might he not need a reference for any future work? Why risk being remembered for the one who sent his mum down to tell them all off. Hopefully once some time passes he’ll look back and laugh or at least not see it as a bad memory.

canalbird · Yesterday 21:14

I’ve worked a jobs with similar. At one you got the bumps into the pond on your last day, at another everyone would squirt cream the leaver.

These were both under 25 type jobs, it’s not particularly unusual.

Lol at someone saying go to the police.

Doggymummar · Yesterday 21:15

Seainasive · Yesterday 20:49

This was a thing in a restaurant I worked in 35 years ago. I’m amazed it’s still happening.

Me too,I was dumped in the pig swill bin on my last day, it's just a bit of fun.

MNLurker1345 · Yesterday 21:17

We sent the new trainee chef of to the
requisition office to get some Tartan food colouring.

itsgettingweird · Yesterday 21:18

hyggetyggedotorg · Yesterday 20:55

If I were your DS that would have been my worst nightmare. However, it was his first job in the adult world even though he’s not quite an adult himself. He’s asked you to do nothing, so I think you should respect that.

Thankfully it shouldn’t happen at his next job!

This was a “thing” on the last day of secondary school in the early 90s. Slightly shocked it’s happening in a workplace TBH.

Still a thing at the school my ds went to.

But it’s organised on the nearby field.

He didn’t get it because he left school Covid year. But that meant he didn’t miss out because they also throw tomato sauce and he’s allergic to it!

I think it’s awful when people behave like this. I thought we’d moved on from the days where we had to laugh at things we didn’t find funny and accept things being done to us that made us feel uncomfortable (my childhood experience)

But if your ds doesn’t want you to speak out I think you have to respect that. I hope it doesn’t make him nervous about future jobs.

bananaboats · Yesterday 21:18

I understand the temptation especially if he was upset by it but I'd just leave it save embarrassing him any further

friedaklein · Yesterday 21:18

WTF! I would have to do.something.

RumPidgeon · Yesterday 21:21

I think it’s absolutely outrageous- he’s still a minor FGS.

I‘d be having words and would hope they never get to do it to anyone else again. Bunch of weirdos - go paintballing or something but don’t do this to a teenager. Hope you take it further.

friedaklein · Yesterday 21:25

I am.baffled by the.posts saying it is a bit of fun. Poor kid.

bellhawk · Yesterday 21:26

Trust your son and stay out of it.

mumofthemonsters808 · Yesterday 21:27

This should not be happening I don’t care if it’s a tradition, he’s 17 and I bet my bottom dollar it was older colleagues getting their kicks humiliating a young lad.Send an email to their head office these idiots need reigning in.We are not in the 1970s it just should not be happening.They need training on acceptable behaviour in the workplace.Your lad will try to play it down, he probably feels embarrassed mine would be shell shocked.

TappyGilmore · Yesterday 21:27

He has asked you not to say anything. Of course it would be wrong for you to make an issue of it. I don’t understand how this is even a question.

Talk to him about it and help him process it. If he changes his mind then go ahead and say something - although I’m not sure “turning up at the company and giving them a piece of your mind” is the way to go about it, there will be proper complaints procedures. But if he doesn’t change his mind, then leave it.

FlapperFlamingo · Yesterday 21:29

He’s asked you not to - so respect him and stay out of it. Horrible thing to happen though, doesysay much for the staff or company.

ShakyBake · Yesterday 21:30

What is the car like now op, were you able to get the stains out? A word of warning with any residual egg matter, it will smell so now is the time to deep clean

Lifelover16 · Yesterday 21:31

I feel sorry that this happened to your son, it’s not acceptable. It used to be where I studied, people would get dunked fully clothed in a bath full of water/cornflakes/beans/ketchup in the halls of residence when an exam was passed. I hope it has stopped now.
IMO it would be even more humiliating for your son if you complained to the company about it, especially if he has specifically asked you not to.

MrsBennetsPoorNervesAreBack · Yesterday 21:31

This is awful - I'm shocked that this would happen in any workplace. I totally understand you wanting to march in and complain, but I don't think you should do that because I think it might be quite disempowering for your son. Instead, help him to understand that this isn't normal or acceptable in any way, and encourage/support him to submit a complaint if that's what he would like to do. He absolutely shouldn't put up with this, but he needs to be allowed to make the decision about how to proceed. A PT job is the first taste of adulthood for many dc. Let him deal with it himself but support him to do so.

Devonshiregal · Yesterday 21:31

what kind of job was it? and no dont call them. he is a big boy. he is under 18, and I'd be pissed off too, but if he's old enough to have a real life job he really doesnt need mum calling up to tell them they upset her baby - and if they are they kind of people who think this kind of thing is funny youre only setting him up for embarrassment. definitely get him to think about how he felt and what he might do in that situation when he's older and others around him are behaving like this - will he get sucked in or will he stand up to it and say no.

NeverDropYourMooncup · Yesterday 21:32

things like my office chair was tampered with so when I sat down I suddenly plummeted to the floor.

That's not a prank, that's an intentional act that could leave somebody - including a teenager - with permanent spinal damage.

user1471538275 · Yesterday 21:35

You said he enjoyed working there, so this was not part of a campaign of bullying and humiliation.

It's a thing in some places.

He's said to leave him so do him the courtesy of accepting that this was his job and his decision.

Oh and tell him not to join the army.

WillieBanjo · Yesterday 21:36

Something similar happened to my sister. Much the same response from my sis . What we only recently found out it’s my mum launched an. anonymous campaign of hate against the company for years afterwards in the days before internet reviews could hurt a business

. Angry mums are not to be crossed.

Smilingzebra · Yesterday 21:39

Did I read that right - they tied him up and did that do him? That is absolutely awful, I can't understand the people commenting that it's harmless fun. It absolutely is assault, and the fact he is a child and they have a duty of care towards him makes it even worse. Would those who think it's ok be fine with it if a teacher did this to a pupil? Of course not!

Normally I would be all for respecting his wishes not to do anything as he's nearly an adult, but it's a safeguarding issue and goes beyond him - if they've done it to him they will no doubt to it to other (children) in the future too. For that reason I'd have to do something - if not for his sake then for future children who work there.