DH's attire on family holiday

[onesinglepringle]

Just looking for some opinions as I don't know if I'm being weird about this!

On a big extended family holiday, all staying in the same house with aunts/ uncles/ cousins/ kids etc that we don't see that often.

DH (late 40's if relevant) is walking around in just the shorts he slept in in the morning whilst he is sorting out our toddler's breakfast etc. No one else seems to be doing this, everyone else is wearing t-shirts.

Is this OK/ normal?

It is warm, and I don't want to tell him to cover up if I'm just being a bit weird and prudish about it.

At the same time, I'm hoping people aren't looking at him and wondering why he's wearing only his sleep shorts from like 6.30-9am, socialising, playing with the kids etc, so it's not just popping down for a coffee. He's unshowered, messy hair etc.

YABU - It's fine, chill out, it's family (even though extended family we don't see)
YANBU - he should cover up like everyone else

you going to volunteer to get up, shower, dressed by 6.30 when the kids wake up? On holiday?

when you have early risers standards are allowed to slip. He is getting showered and dressed once someone else is up to take over.

Chill out.

Are we talking about a washboard six pack on display, a middling dad bod or is he rocking a Homer Simpson beer belly? With or without chest hair? These details matter

“Too middle class” 😭 You’ve clearly never spent summers at a lake house, beach house, cabin, whatever your regional version is. People live in swimsuits, bare feet and whatever they threw on over them. That isn’t “dropping standards,” it’s literally how casual summer houses work. Please stop pretending getting fully dressed for breakfas is some universal marker of class.

It depends on the shorts IMO. My husband had some comfy jersey long pyjama trousers that I hated him wearing when with his or my parents because you could see his penis imprint through it and no-one needs to see that 😂!

It wouldn't bother me one bit, nor the rest of my family. A man without a t-shirt on is not the same as a woman wandering around with her boobs on display.

Isn't it interesting that in any thread discussing women wearing anything other than a full swimsuit/baggy clothes at the gym etc every poster bar none insist that they aren't being misogynistic, they hate to see toplesss men too.
Not on this thread though. Mmm.

I have been on this site for a totally of 15 mins over the last 12 hours and this is the second time I've written this... the bar some of you have for men is so low I worry about how you live and what your children are growing up in and worse, thinking is normal.

Tell him to put a tshirt on @onesinglepringle no one (apparently) wants to see that.

We have just been on holiday a holiday with extended family and most people got up in PJ's in the morning , it was fine there weren't enough showers for everyone to get washed and dressed before breakfast

I wouldn’t want anyone walking around without a T-shirt personally especially in the kitchen as I’m easily put off my food! I’d say something.

I'd also be uncomfortable with this. I'm no prude but don't want to see a male relative barely dressed with balls dangling in overnight pj shorts while I'm eating my breakfast. Bare chest at the pool is fine, in a shared holiday house is not.

I also don't think he deserves a medal for doing basic parenting. I thought the bar was a bit higher on mumsnet but seeing the other posts obviously not.

He’s wearing ‘sleep shorts’ also known as pyjamas. Soft cotton things where every movement under the fabric is visible 😬 possibly he’s wearing something very different to what I think of as ‘sleep shorts’ but if he’s sleeping in them I think we can assume they’re not structured or stiff.

Swim shorts have mesh inside that keeps everything together/from falling out of a raised leg. They’re also a bit stiffer/thicker fabric.

But my main response to that would be: I expect people to be half naked on the beach or by the pool. I wouldn’t necessarily be expecting it round the breakfast table.

He’s wearing ‘sleep shorts’ also known as pyjamas. Soft cotton things where every movement under the fabric is visible 😬 possibly he’s wearing something very different to what I think of as ‘sleep shorts’ but if he’s sleeping in them I think we can assume they’re not structured or stiff.

Swim shorts have mesh inside that keeps everything together/from falling out of a raised leg. They’re also a bit stiffer/thicker fabric.

But my main response to that would be: I expect people to be half naked on the beach or by the pool. I wouldn’t necessarily be expecting it round the breakfast table.

Yes, this is what I’m, unfortunately, picturing 😂🤢

In the same way I put a bra on before I come downstairs (still in my pjs) when my father in law is staying because I don’t think he needs to have any further information about the shape of my breasts/nipples.

Hopefully not or the naked top will be the least of people's worries.

If you feel uncomfortable about it just tell him to sling on a t-shirt. Doesn't need to be a big deal unless he makes it into one.

I don’t have one now but when my daughter was a toddler, yes she did sleep until at least 8, and we just went out for breakfast once she was awake and dressed.

Not acceptable, nope. People's dress standards have got lower and lower. Even among family my DH would try to look a little bit dapper, even a tailored short-sleeved shirt as opposed to a T-shirt. And you can't just skip a shower, there are basic standards. Plus not showering makes you feel horrible, especially if it's been hot.

I think a t shirt would be more appropriate, and the fact your DH is the only one not wearing one makes it even more weird IMO!

I've been in a pool holiday with extended family (in laws) and we all wore swimwear by the pool but if going inside or up the the outdoor eating area for lunch the ladies put a beach cover up type thing on and the gents put a t shirt on. Ditto when coming down from our rooms in the morning to get breakfast or head to the pool.

You say you're not on a pool/beach holiday, so I think the lack of t shirt in a morning is even more jarring!

I also worry that jersey shorts wouldn't leave anything to the imagination tbh! Is there anyway he can get dressed before he heads into the public living space with your child?

Also lolling at PPs Q about why he's getting up at half 6 on holiday! Children do not understand that weekends/holidays = lie ins! I was up at 05:30 every day with my kids on our two week holiday, it was torture!

I initially thought you were being unreasonable, but then remembered that the other day I whispered to my husband to go and put a t shirt on when our granddaughter face timed and he only had pj shorts on, so now I think I agree with you! Do you think it bothers anyone else?

The MN levels of disgust at the human body are wild. It seems to tie together the crazy levels of germphobia - the squeals of disgust throughout this thread are too much - and the equally crazy obsession with social class (a middle-class person would never be half-naked - though the very posh 20-something men playing tennis shirtless on the court next to me the other day would beg to differ).

Before 9am on holiday is not a time for a dress code and this would not bother me.

I'm keenly awaiting the answer to this as well.

Yuck. Totally unacceptable

You need to chill out

Bloke here and no it's not ok. Shorts is fine but definitely needs a shirt

He’s wearing pj shorts all day? Ask him to shower in the morning and wear normal shorts (with underwear).