Dh says the U.K is f***** and he never wants to go back

[Chippednailtoepolish]

These were his words this morning.

We live abroad in a place where a lot of people are coming to live, escaping the uk and America.
He says with everything on the news, the way it's going and what the people coming to where we are tell him, that we'd be mad to return.
Is he being realistic? I want to return to be with family desperately and have a strange feeling that I need to do it soon

Would we be mad to return at this time? If yes, then when!

That's so weird! What kind of crimes do you imagine are happening??

I've not seen any evidence of a rise in crime. There are issues in the UK, but that ain't it.

I would have thought that was fucking obvious.

Everyone's experience is unique and subjective, isn't it? Of course, the (predominantly) rightwing media and the onslaught on social media by Trumpist bots, etc has encouraged even people living here with no experience (of the shite being propagated by media) that "it must be true or they wouldn't be saying it".

I live in a lovely coastal town. There's little crime, local small businesses are thriving, we have great cafes and restaurants, the schools are good. We have only one GP practice, yet I can go down at 8am and ask for a same day GP appointment. I've been referred by my lovely (not British-born) GP for tests recently - a wide panel of bloods was taken the same week and the results were on my NHS app the next day. Referral for an ultrasound scan took a few weeks to come through, but I had it within a 10 minute walk from my house at our local clinic and the lovely sonographer talked me through it and reassured me there was nothing to see.

I'm struggling to see what's "fucked" about life where I live. Obviously, a highly-populated country will - like all others like it - experience issues. Some of these came about because of a stupid decision by the then-Prime Minister to have a referendum and enact the narrowly-voted decision. A lot of the people shouting that the UK is "fucked" are the people who created the situation.

How old are your parents?

Could you not just come home more frequently as it’s not very far?

I live in Yorkshire in a beautiful village. Crime is no different to when I was growing up here 40 years ago. NHS isn't great but if you can supplement it by going privately for certain procedures, it's not too bad. Yes cost of living increasing but I'd imagine that's everywhere. TBH, it's more like when I was young rather than the "easier" times twenty years ago but it's a cycle.

Totally depends where in UK you might live and how well off you are.

Trump and Musk keep talking about it - it's almost as if they're trying to deflect, isn't it?

I’m intrigued that the Op seems genuinely confused that people have different views and experiences of England

Having lived in this country my whole life I can literally see and feel what’s going on. To try and make out that there are few problems when the shoplifters literally walk past with food in their arms and the shop staff just watch them as trying to stop them just ends in violence. You can see the filth and anti social behaviour and the local parks and communal spaces being trashed by teenagers. The high street is Turkish barber, Vape shop, board up shop on repeat. None wants to go out in the evening as the high street becomes a war zone. The attitude of primary aged children is like dealing with kids ten years older.

I suspect all the people claiming there’s zero problems are WFH in a lovely area, ordering all their food shipping and takeaways in and visiting stately houses at the weekend.

Crime is down massively from the heights in the 90s. People don't believe that though.

Good documentary on the stats etc here

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m0030c2y

Also if he BU depends on where he's been getting his info whilst abroad. If it's GB News, no wonder he think that!

Well there are crimes so the pp isn’t imagining those

I live somewhere with endless dodgy vape shops and barbers. Money laundering targets. It’s just tolerated by the council.

I drove my neighbour to the hospital with a broken shoulder and they were fine. In fact we had to go to two hospitals as the first one was a little local one that didn’t have x-rays. They were fine, got treatment and shoulder is now working merrily.

An ambulance is for emergencies, a broken arm is not an emergency. Ambulances (in all countries) cost insane amounts, they were for life threatening issues. You sound spoilt. Maybe you should pay for private ambulances in future. I don’t know any country who is willing to do this for a fit and healthy person.

I live in a lovely part of England
Very happy
can’t recall the last time I got a takeaway or visited a stately home 😆

It doesn’t really matter whether your husband is right or wrong though does it?
He doesn’t want to come back so you need to decide how you feel about that.
You can hear from the pessimistic and the optimistic on this thread (and you really have done, haven’t you) but he’s going to believe the pessimism as he’s looking for confirmation bias.
Personally I really don’t think the UK is fucked but I don’t expect your husband to believe me.

Yes it is true. If can afford private healthcare, schools and live in a good area, perfect.

Really hard to get a GP apt, 8.30am tussle on the phone trying to get through and be one of the lucky ones to get an apt. Ambulances are taking hours in some, no, many cases. Not really their fault as they sit outside a A&E department, waiting for the hospital to take the patient from them. Sometimes several ambulances lined up outside these days.

Referrals for treatment, years waiting. I've waited 19 months for cardiology, 14 months for gynae, and nearly 3 years for help with ENT - ENT keeps sending me off with random, nothing stuff and I have to then ask for further opinions. I paid private for one of them just to prove the person in ENT was wrong.

Schools - many are academies now, awful way to run schools, children have a miserable time of it. I heard they were going to make primary schools academies too, poor loves.

Racism, out loud spoken racism is now becoming the norm.
Teenagers bored. Bored teenagers make trouble. Knife crime, sexual offences have gone up.

Opportunities for youngsters has fallen out of school. University (buys them 3 years before looking for a job) costs an arm and a leg, leaving kids with £50+k debt. Housing ladder harder to get on for youngsters.

The cost. Everything has gone up, many food items at least double from 5 years ago. Expensive to eat out, go out. Household costs gone up.

The UK, both attitude and services has gone downhill.

My mum just broke her arm. She needed an ambulance. She was on her own and couldn't even stand up. The ambulance did come though and pretty quick.

This.

Delighted for you.

Your husband is correct. I suppose if you are rich and can live in a posh area and send your children to nice schools and not have to mix with the undesirables it might be ok. If not then it is a shit hole. Schools are terrible, lots of kids with SEN and lack of support, bad behaviour even in the nicer schools. (I work in education) We are letting in all manor of criminals. My area is very much like a lot of the country, the demographic has changed a lot over the last 20 years, not for the better. High Streets full of vape shops and barbers (money laundering). If your a middle income person don't bother coming back your going to be taxed more to pay for the bone idol (terrible labour government absolute shit show). There are over a million young people not in education, training or employment. The cost of living is very high. Kids are ferral and have a lack of respect for adults they ride around on electric scooters being a nuisance and that's the very low level things. The NHS is in a state, you will be lucky to get an NHS dentist too. The weather's shit most of the time and now we are getting fires too. Don't do it. People will tell you it's right wing media, it's just the truth. If your left wing you defo won't want to come back as if it stays as it is there will be a right wing government in the near future because people are sick and tired of the same old shite. Sorry op I wish I could say different it's sad what has happened to this country.

Where I live is safe and lovely, yet it's supposedly a deprived area.
News and SM don't reflect reality at all.

Cheers. I’m delighted for myself. Sounds bloody bleak where you are!

I don’t think anyone is saying there are ‘zero’ problems, but they don’t seem to be as the media wants you to think. The stats support this. Things aren’t easy right now but that’s across the world, it’s not British-specific. Of course there is crime, there is crime everywhere, but Britain isn’t some wild land like is being suggested. It’s an exaggeration of the situation. I don’t work from home, can’t afford takeaways and we don’t have any stately houses around where I live, so.

It is pretty bad in a lot of places. I suspect it'll get worse and hit rock bottom before it gets better.