Dh says the U.K is f***** and he never wants to go back

[Chippednailtoepolish]

These were his words this morning.

We live abroad in a place where a lot of people are coming to live, escaping the uk and America.
He says with everything on the news, the way it's going and what the people coming to where we are tell him, that we'd be mad to return.
Is he being realistic? I want to return to be with family desperately and have a strange feeling that I need to do it soon

Would we be mad to return at this time? If yes, then when!

If you have a child, you can't just move back without his consent, so you'll both need to be in agreement.

It's not yet, but people believe it's only a possibility of time too, for the moment very safe in general but very expensive and low wages

Bear in mind that you're hearing from people who have their own reasons for moving to the country that you are in. They will have strong opinions as they have made the decision to emigrate and will have decided that the benefits for them outweigh the negatives. Of course what they say will be a very biased one sided commentary on the state of the UK at the moment.

I think it's very naive for your DH to take what they say at face value.

The UK is not fucked. Far from it. It suits lots of people to suggest the opposite though, and to push that narrative in order to chase power and wealth.

Whether or not you should return depends on your personal situation and is a discussion for you and your DH to have between you. No one here could possibly say.

What are these people saying exactly though? Is it worth a long visit and see how you get on?

That's reassuring thank you x

I don’t think he’s lost touch with reality, economically this country is a complete mess and no one seems to want to even admit it let alone try to address it. The strategy seems to be ignore it and hope it sorts itself out.
Then there are the political and social divisions within the country. The country is a disaster with little to no hope of recovery in the foreseeable future.
If you can build a life abroad that seems a sensible idea to be honest.

He's not wrong

I do and he did until the last few years

🤣🤣

Where are you living now?

Should be....? What does that mean?

And career? Great. What about jobs? Can you transfer with your current employer? Bring your pension? Or fund yourselves for at least 6-12m of rent, bills and living costs while you find jobs or resume your careers in the UK?

I love the UK. Maybe I’m in a bubble but the things you see on the news don’t really apply to my life. Yanbu in wanting to return. Why does he get the final say? (Especially given his isn’t actually based on anything) Do you have an equal relationship?

Where are you though?
And can you please be a bit more specific than “fucked”? It doesn’t give us much to go on.

What issues is he worried about? Are you white?

Yes it's getting more racist, and the quality of life will slowly decline forever, I think, in terms of expenses and also utilities.

But if your family are here, that is enormously important.

Basically crime etc

I was out of the country for some of the run up to Brexit. The general consensus was that the UK was acting stupidly and (as always) xenophobically. Shooting itself in the foot to stick it to Johnny Foreigner.

And if Reform get near power, that's the same x1000.

So yes, fucked isn't far off.

But day-to-day, lots of great things to celebrate.

No, just sounds like something he is saying because he doesn't wish to return. He should listen to you and your reasons for wanting to return because they sound important and you don't want to live with regret.

Really?! It's still nice?

What area would you move back to?

Crime is a weird thing to worry about! Our crime stats are very low.

It does but I have my child to think about and the best and safest life

the things you see on the news don’t really apply to my life.

You are naive if you believe this. They do. It's all politics.

Racism is getting worse worldwide though, I was genuinely surprised at the racism in Spain. It’s an issue that is happening in a lot of places, not just Britain. Unfortunately.

We need to have more positive mindsets. It's not great, but by jove we've won the lottery being born here. Look up life in a country like Haiti, the DRC or Myanmar. We're some of the luckiest people on the planet, but greed and individualism makes us think otherwise. Even people one hundred years ago in Britain would tell us to give our heads a wobble. Hot showers, indoor loos, washing machines, healthy food, free primary and secondary education, foreign holidays, medical advances. I could go on and on. We're some of the luckiest people in the history of the planet. We need to be able to acknowledge that we have enough, most of us have enough! The endless desire for more, more, more and the jealousy and discontent that breeds is a cancer on society. If you have a roof over your head, food on your plate, some free time and hobbies, and friends and family who love you, you're doing well. If you have good health and a bit of spare cash you're doing even better.

That pretty similar though in most places, sadly

But you have to both be in agreement to move your child back to the UK - so if he doesn't agree with you, you're fucked. Unfortunately.