Upper Middle Class not well travelled AIBU?

[Tabbytiger122]

There are some very wealthy folk we know & some I'm acquaintances with on fb from college. All seem to run off similar schedule for holidays... Christmas skiing in France/Switzerland (same place every year) Midterm said place again, summer is always spent somewhere in France ,Italy or Greece (but always the same town)
That's it never different countries... it seems to me they are not well travelled & that familiarity is more important than going somewhere new for the heck of it! Aibu?

We have traveled extensively when younger, now we prefer holidays in Europe, eg large private villas in large grounds because we go on holiday to relax.

still do several city breaks each year but have 0 interest in going to,developing countries any more, mainly due to safety, eg would never go to South Africa or India.

I don’t care where other people choose to go on holiday, why would you?

They probably have family / friends properties in those places.

Skiing with kids, for me is the absolute time to be sticking with what you like and know works. Why waste time figuring out where everything is and what the family routine will be?

OH and I both have busy and stressful jobs. Holidays for us, for the time being at least, are about relaxation not adventure. And unfortunately we always need to be somewhere with decent WiFi/mobile connection. We’re perfectly happy doing repeat trips where we know we won’t be disappointed.

You probably really don’t know what goes on during their holidays. They probably immerse themselves in French culture which is far more that can be said about the people that go to an AI resort every year. These AI visitors might go to different countries but as they don’t often set foot outside the resort, they wouldn’t know anything about the country or its people.

I'm just making an observation & I thought it was interesting. For me personally if I had that sort of money to spend I wouldn't be in France or Greece at the exact same place every year I'd be in Barbados or Mauritius. And I'd want my dc to see as much of the world as possible. It's just an observation & others have agreed they notice the same

That sounds fabulous & great you are enjoying it!

How is this any of your business, OP?

Meh, seen one hotel or resort in a place like Barbados or Mauritius, seen them all...

Would MNs even exist if everyone minded their own business! 😆

There have been many theories that the new class symbols have shifted from material goods to more unspoken rules of taste and exclusivity. Taking holidays in the same places is a crucial part of showing you belong to a certain community. Wealthy people are simply using travel as a way of strengthening their social class. They're essentially investing their finite holiday time in building social bonds with many people they already know or want to know closer. The benefits they get from being accepted by the class they aspire to be part of is far higher than what they might gain from a single holiday to a random-far flung location.

Travel is also a way people can immediately bond with others they're not very close with. When socialising, a lot of upper class people like to ask casual but very pre-determined questions to check whether you belong to their community. Obvious ones would be whether you ski, where you ski, which resorts you've been to, which ones were the best etc. If you cannot answer those questions, they're not interested. Being "well travelled" is pretty meaningless in their eyes and won't impress anyone during a dinner party conversation.

Several decades, being a world traveller was probably a status symbol. It showed you had the money, time, curiosity and a sort of courage to experience all sorts of new places. However I'd argue that backpacking culture, gap years and budget travel has taken the aura away from being able to travel the world. Social media has also cheapened exotic places because anyone can just watch a vlog on a trip to the the most obscure locations.

So in all honesty, it's no longer impressive to tell people you've been to X amount of countries. It often comes across as a bit smug and braggy to be honest. There are people who travel because they love it, and there are those who think that travelling makes them better people than others. It's easy to sniff out the smug travellers because they always want some sort of reaction to their stories or anecdotes.

The upper middle class know this and they're not interested in connecting with people who have just travelled all over. They're looking for people who have the taste and insider knowledge of which specific locations to go, and ideally ones with mutual friends in those holiday destinations.

They may well have travelled extensively during their gap year and before DC.

They might have horses, horsey people stay close to home.

They might have second homes to visit.

They might ski with a regular group and have favourite destinations.

Not everyone is driven to explore new places.

For some people holidaying is about familiarity above all else.
They cannot fathom holidaying without their circle.
Often, they have never holidayed as a sole family unit.
Different strokes.

This is an excellent reply ,thank you! You have worded what I meant much more eloquently than me. Yes it's like a silent umc or mc marker!

I'm not UMC, but I like to holiday in the same place repeatedly as I'm quite boring, know what I like and don't want to have to relearn where the local supermarket is for a week.

I do occasionally go to new places, but I've been to quite a few places and don't want to travel just for travel's sake any more.

Holidays are supposed to be enjoyable, if you enjoy the same place, what's so strange about that?

That said, most UMC people are well-travelled anyway; they go for work, backpacking when younger/gap years, the odd far-off destination; they don't rely on one or two family holidays to broaden their travel horizons every year.

The PP has nailed it. I know that in certain circles if I mention where we ski in February half term, or which exact place in Cornwall we got to for various summer holidays, or which Greek area we visit in May, we'll make an instant connection/recognition of similar status. Now that's not the reason for going there, as people have said above, it's often due to facilities/quality/recommendations so that no one wastes what little holiday time they have on anything substandard.

No idea re relevance of class but…we do repeat trips, partly as we know they work for us, there’s much less thinking involved (and balancing work and childcare doesn’t leave much space to think/plan), the prep is easier, we settle in quicker so holidays feel longer - and like someone above said - each of us always has to work for a portion of a break and if we return to a location, we know it’s possible for us.

When budget allows we try do something new too but ‘safe reliable and restful’ is prioritized first. We’ve “traveled” pre kids (working in several locations ensures this), we have family away we also travel to see, and each sometimes have to work away (dh particularly). Resort travel in many places around the world is the same/very similar. I’ve places I’d love to be with the kids when they are older but…for now holidays are about easy time together. Many of those I know that return to specific same locations, do so for similar reasons to those shared above. Word of mouth recommendations and the security of knowing something works for your family/work needs.

I am certainly not wealthy & I’ve travelled a fair bit but I’m guilty of returning to the same place again & again. Sometimes I’ve booked the next holiday for the same hotel while still at the hotel for the current holiday! There’s something about knowing you’ll have a guaranteed good time as you enjoyed it the first time . You know where you’re going, no pressure to do all the trips as you’ve done them so can relax & not feel guilty that you haven’t seen this cultural site or that famous place.
to do with class I don’t think

I think this is a great indicator of how subconsciously tribal humans are. Most people have a very limited amount holidays so choosing to spend it in a certain place that lots of "people like you" are already doing makes perfect sense. DH is an absolute victim of this. He's positively gleeful whenever he meets people at a holiday location that he already knows from back home. Human tribes also used to migrate and move around in groups, so seeing someone you know in a faraway place has an oddly powerful bonding power. Obviously modern travel has made it too easy to go anywhere, so being able to coincidentally meet up with like-minded individuals on holiday requires a huge amount of taste, finances and planning. It's arguably much harder to have successful tribal holidays compared to just travelling to a random place.

OP, respectfully, if you’re this surprised people with money don’t make the same choices you’d make it you had the same means, you’re going to find lots of life really baffling.

I agree that people who keep going back to the same couple of places aren't well travelled but unless they brag about how well travelled they are, I don't see why it's a problem.

Personally, I like to see a bit more of the world and to travel to different places but it would be a boring world if we all like the same thing.

I'd also argue that for a subset of UMC people, travel is an inherent part of their life and not exciting or enriching for the sake of it. Examples would be families that move around a lot, diplomats, third culture kids etc. They may already speak several languages and have lived in lots of cities and they genuinely have zero desire to travel to more countries just for novelty. They're quite happy with a predictable holiday routine and seeing the same people in the same places.

I think its an interesting take.

Cos ive seen and commented on posts where people have the opinion thay those who travel every year to the same resort in say Lanzarote or Tenerife every year are a bit uncultured and working class.

But change that to someone doing the same thing but with skiing in the same place every year and now its upper middle.

not sure what class has to do with it.. we have at least 3 foreign holidays a year and one of them is to our favourite Greek island and we stay in the same hotel and request a room in a certain place in the hotel… doesn’t mean we don’t want to explore the world!

I think it's down to personal preference - you prefer visiting different places, they like the familiarity. I also think things change over time. I like traveling to different places but I've had to say lately, I like planning a trip where I can relax knowing what I'm getting. I've done a trip a few times that I can "perfect" it to how I like. It's not necessarily a wealth thing because you can still spend the same amount or more getting what you want.

I love going back to places I like. I enjoy the anticipation, and the joy of rediscovering familiar walks and cafes. We are all different, OP. Your desire for novelty isn't anything to feel superior about.