AIBU to be angry about comments on my granddaughters' names?

[Ellenay]

So, I have 5 grandchildren, this weekend I’m looking after all of them, my daughter and her husband are away to a wedding in France and my son and his wife have booked a little spa weekend.

I popped in to see some of my friends with them as I don’t often have the children and my friends like seeing them.

One of my friends had some other friends I’ve not met before over but we joined them. After introducing the children and then being sent to the kitchen to get a lollipop, one of these friends said oh don’t all the girls have little showgirl names, I must have looked a bit shocked as someone else then jumped in and said oh she doesn’t mean p*rnstar just very moulin rouge.

I just said I thought their names were lovely and moved on but now I’m back home I’m furious, I’m furious I didn’t give her a piece of my mind.

AIBU to think this is an absurd thing to say about children’s names?!

It was rude, because it's always rude to say anything about someone else's choice of name unless it's a compliment or (if you hate it) carefully bland e.g. 'That's unusual!'
'Showgirl names', for those affecting wide-eyed confusion, are things like Lola and Coco and Fifi.

Is it not just because of Copacabana and Chicago? Can’t see how Ruby is a showgirl name though.

Well it’s telling that 2 posters guessed 2 of the names isn’t it op.

Surely you’ve heard of Copacabana?

Also yes Roxy Hart from Chicago.

I don't know why everyone's pretending you're being unreasonable OP.

Obviously it was an intentionally barbed comment. That person is nasty and badly raised. And also out of date in their views, names don't have to be Edwardian to be perfectly pleasant and valid.

Put them from your mind and enjoy your GDC and just don't be around that person again. And be honest with your friend who brought them about why you don't want to see this person, if they enquire.

There was an actress/singer called Ruby Keeler. And she was in Showgirl! 😁

It obviously wasn't a compliment OP. "Showgirl" names is a derogatory comment whichever way you look at it. It was rude and they should've kept their thoughts to themselves or at least until after you'd gone.

Regardless of your own personal feelings the only acceptable comment on hearing a child’s name is “oh isn’t that pretty” or a bland remark about how much you like it/have never heard that before how lovely and unusual/ or I know a “insert name” it’s sweet.

I didn’t name my child and it’s one that features regularly here as “chavvy”. It’s really nasty to hear. It might be to you taste but thank goodness we are all different otherwise wouldn’t life be boring.

That person was very rude.

I wondered this too. A bit clumsy but not intentionally derogatory.

I can understand why OP felt offended though, especially given this woman doesn’t know her granddaughters well to say it in an affectionate kind of way.

It’s a well known older song (as also pointed out above). “Her name was Lola; she was a showgirl”

I must admit I could see why the remark was made when I saw the three names together.

Although it was probably a little rude to say it unless she knows you’d find it funny.

Totally agree op. The only response when told a name is to say 'lovely'. To sneer about 'showgirls' is not ok.

When meeting a Lola, surely it is better to think of Barry Manilow than The Kinks.

It would've been a rude thing to say about a grown woman's name, let alone a bunch of little girls. She should've controlled that intrusive thought.

Not to me. It means talented and exotic. It's not an insult.

She won't have meant that.

She meant they sound like rather tacky names, Lola, Roxy etc. She should have kept her thoughts to herself, but no point getting annoyed, people can have opinions on names. Besides, presumably you didn't choose the names anyway.

Isn’t “Lola, she was a showgirl” literally a line from Copacabana? Maybe the song jumped into her head.

I wouldn’t be offended by it TBH. They are nice names in any case.

I disagree, it could easily have been a compliment.

Lovely names, I like them and she was being bitchy.

It’s a downright rude comment to make to someone you’ve just met. Your mutual friend was likely quite embarrassed by that.

Even if you think it you don’t say it out loud to their grandmother.

Yeah it’s rude - regardless of what she thinks of their names, if she can’t say something nice then keep quiet.

I happen to like all those names, but I can see why they’d be referred to as “show girl” names. However I’d take it like cabaret, nothing unpleasant. I think you’re over reacting

It sounds as though she didnt mean it positively - at best gauche, at worst sneering.

Is it worth being upset over? No - is it a wider pattern of behaviour?

Great minds 😂

They are the most showgirl of showgirl names. I mean, "her name was Lola, she was a showgirl"! Roxy from Chicago...

The real question is why you're so horribly prejudiced against showgirls?

I would never say anything about a childs name unless I absolutely loved it, but sorry, Lola and Roxy are showgirl names. Ruby possibly a bit less so.

There is nothing wrong with them as names but they are hardly Susan and Jane and are going to attract comment from some, especially in combination. I don't however think it was a horrible comment, depends on tone.

I think we all are. I’ve got to look up what the next line is or I will be driven mad by that one line repeating in my mind .