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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think Meghan Markle has every right to worry about her security?

532 replies

Hardware252525252525 · 20/08/2026 22:07

I’m not a monarchist and haven’t really taken much notice of the whole saga, but obviously do know the main points.

However, the comments across Mumsnet and multiple newspapers and websites are absolutely insane and unhinged. People who don’t know them insisting she’s leaving Harry and the kids, is controlling him, that they’re skint and tge
kids will have to go to state school if Charles doesn’t pay, people saying they hope a random stranger sees her and gives her ‘some home truths’.

It is absolutely crackers and I worry about the sanity of the people who seem to really believe they know them.

OP posts:
EasternStandard · 21/08/2026 12:20

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 12:18

Does anyone think they don't need security?!

I don’t get the narrative that the press have fostered re they won’t get it paid for by the taxpayer.

Reading the posts below on what gets provided they will. Burnham’s statement seemed to be misunderstood or misleading.

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 12:24

EasternStandard · 21/08/2026 12:20

I don’t get the narrative that the press have fostered re they won’t get it paid for by the taxpayer.

Reading the posts below on what gets provided they will. Burnham’s statement seemed to be misunderstood or misleading.

Yes, it's puzzling. Of course they get taxpayer funded security, they always have and they always will. However, just not on the terms Harry demands.
I do wish people would inform themselves. Such a lot of misinformation on this thread. It's fine to be a fan, but pp are doing them a disservice by believing nonsense.

PinkTonic · 21/08/2026 12:31

Fizbosshoes · 21/08/2026 07:22

Genuine question-how much security do Mike Tindal and zAra have? Ive no idea but they and kids seem to live reasonably privately.

I think there will be more interest in H and M because they actively left/opted out, but
Also because theyve been pretty outspoken about it. But after the initial interest, I wonder if it would be possible to live in a low key way....

I saw them on a train a few weeks ago. Just travelling by train back from London, carrying their own bags. If there was a police officer with them I didn’t see them.

MintChocCat · 21/08/2026 12:33

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 12:18

Does anyone think they don't need security?!

Some people genuinely believe they don’t deserve it!

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 12:35

MintChocCat · 21/08/2026 12:33

Some people genuinely believe they don’t deserve it!

That's a bit silly! They obviously have no idea what the duties and responsibilities of the Home Office are.
However, it doesn't surprise me.
Many don't like the fact that Nigel Farage gets taxpayer funded security, but that's the way of it.

jacks11 · 21/08/2026 12:35

I’ll be honest, I don’t like what I do know of Harry and Megan- obviously I don’t know them personally but from they way they have presented themselves and their behaviour (I’m talking about that which is known to be accurate ), I cannot respect them.

However, I imagine the family do need security- just as many people in the public eye do. They are not unique in that. However, as far as I know, very few celebrities expect the state to fund their security requirements. I find it utterly galling that Harry and Megan think they should have the tax payer fund theirs. They are private citizens. I assume that they both knew when they ceased to be working members of the royal family that this was one of the consequences- yet still made that decision to step away, as was their right. Why do they then expect that they can ignore the consequences of their choices? They seem to feel rules cannot and should not apply to them. By all means, they should have security but they can pay for it themselves. And if they don’t want to attract media attention, and instead wish to live quiet and private lives, perhaps the best way to achieve this is to stop courting it so avariciously? They don’t because the truth is they want the limelight and they money- they just don’t want any of the downsides of it.

Harry likes to bleat on about the plight of ex-servicemen and women- yet he wants more spent on his security per year than all the rest of this group will likely to have spent on them in their lifetime, rather than pay for it as other families in their situation have to. Only senior working royals have the kind of security he is after, and some of them only get it whilst they are travelling to/from and during their duties. Harry is a hypocrite of the worst order, imo.

Added to that- Harry cites the risk due to his military service. The sheer idiocy, then, of publicly bragging to the entire world in his memoir about killing so many people in Afghanistan is truly astounding. Why, if you are so worried about your safety, and that of your family’s, would you advertise this fact. It is inviting attention, and likely to be from some hostile quarters? Either he is stupid, careless or so entitled as to assume he could do and say whatever he liked and someone else would ensure he was sheltered from the consequences (or pay to protect him from any potential consequences)- it’s absurd, I have family members who are ex-service personnel or current members of the armed forces- every single one of them was fairly disgusted with him regarding this and thought he was being both extremely foolish, and behaving with exceptionally poor taste to frame his military service in this manner. They all accept that taking a life may be required in conflict, but it is not something to publicly celebrate for financial gain (making his book more headline grabbing) or brag about . I know there are rumblings from people who served with him that his time in service was not all that he presents it to be, too. If there is a target on his back because of this, he put it there all by himself and will have to manage the consequences of his actions. Any other ex-service personnel (even those who have some degree of celebrity status) who did the same would have to pay for private security if they wanted it- Harry is a private citizen, so he should too.

MintChocCat · 21/08/2026 12:36

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 12:35

That's a bit silly! They obviously have no idea what the duties and responsibilities of the Home Office are.
However, it doesn't surprise me.
Many don't like the fact that Nigel Farage gets taxpayer funded security, but that's the way of it.

Exactly

Backtoschooloncemore · 21/08/2026 12:40

AnitaCam · 21/08/2026 11:44

The use of the word hate nowadays is so incredibly toxic and lazy. What happened to airing doubts, discussing ambivalence, deciding against, etc… it’s all over emotionalised under a hyperbolic label of ‘ hate’. Truly absurd.

It also frames ‘hate’ as always bad, when it is not only reasonable to hate some things but worrying if people don’t.

Ukisgaslit · 21/08/2026 12:41

I can’t find the post but someone stated that Anne only gets tax payer funded security when on a visit.
That’s just not true . There are checkpoints near her estate and local police patrol.
Both of those come at a cost to the taxpayer.
I imagine similar for Edward etc.

EasternStandard · 21/08/2026 12:44

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 12:24

Yes, it's puzzling. Of course they get taxpayer funded security, they always have and they always will. However, just not on the terms Harry demands.
I do wish people would inform themselves. Such a lot of misinformation on this thread. It's fine to be a fan, but pp are doing them a disservice by believing nonsense.

Yes although the media shouldn’t be that clueless, and Burnham make misleading statements, so I can understand why people were led by them.

Backtoschooloncemore · 21/08/2026 12:45

Isitevensummer · 21/08/2026 11:57

It is silly season, and newspapers know that stuff about harry and meghan pushes engagement. But you are 100% spot on about the way people talk about them. And not just them - Lucy Letby, Amanda Knox - the British press loves to stir up a witch hunt, and lots of people are too stupid to understand that. Questioning choice is one thing but the vitriol we see is something else. As poor Jason Arday and his family have tragically just discovered.

what about poor Epstein who killed himself too? Or Mandleson with all his Chinese links becoming public spoiling his career hopes? Or media speaking ill of the dead when it came to Saville? Angela Raynor probably found it stressful when her tax manipulations became public. How dare the media bring things to the public attention!

simpsonthecat · 21/08/2026 12:48

Ukisgaslit · 21/08/2026 12:41

I can’t find the post but someone stated that Anne only gets tax payer funded security when on a visit.
That’s just not true . There are checkpoints near her estate and local police patrol.
Both of those come at a cost to the taxpayer.
I imagine similar for Edward etc.

Yes, and I know that for a fact.

Very boring job but someone has to do it!

And Andrew of course. I presume Charles is paying for that and I'm sure the accounting in the books shows it to be his own private money....

Iworkmiricles · 21/08/2026 12:48

May be ICE are on to them? That's why they are back? 😂

AliceMcK · 21/08/2026 13:04

I think they are absolutely bonkers to come back here, the level of vicious vitriol against them is disgusting, I think they are very brave, but I also think she was brave to marry into that cult anyway.

I’m guessing the reason has everything to do with Charles wanting them here, once he’s gone there will just be William and Kate who herself has had cancer. It’s a far cry from what the royal family looked like 10 years ago. Given every public and hidden scandal this family has gone through and come out of it as if their shit dosnt stink I think that there is a plan to bring the Sussex’s back and make them popular again for the sake of the monarchy as the alternative is loosing it.

rocklivia · 21/08/2026 13:06

SmashThePatriarchy · 21/08/2026 12:11

Probably for the schools and so the children can grow up around family. Maybe they now think they can block out the hatred better? Who knows.

I honestly don’t understand fully grown adults typing abuse out on internet forums or commenting on social media. You don’t have to agree or like everyone but you don’t have to be unkind. It’s pathetic.

Yet the things you refer to people saying are exactly what the Hams did - lie about people and events.

Screamingabdabz · 21/08/2026 13:24

AnitaCam · 21/08/2026 11:44

The use of the word hate nowadays is so incredibly toxic and lazy. What happened to airing doubts, discussing ambivalence, deciding against, etc… it’s all over emotionalised under a hyperbolic label of ‘ hate’. Truly absurd.

So true.

The last time I looked, we were allowed to disagree and debate in this country. Very occasionally it’s hate, but I think thick people can’t easily spot the difference.

cornflakecrunchie · 21/08/2026 13:31

@jacks11 Spot on.

Abra1t · 21/08/2026 13:37

simpsonthecat · 21/08/2026 12:48

Yes, and I know that for a fact.

Very boring job but someone has to do it!

And Andrew of course. I presume Charles is paying for that and I'm sure the accounting in the books shows it to be his own private money....

She seems to pay for that herself.

Isitevensummer · 21/08/2026 13:48

Backtoschooloncemore · 21/08/2026 12:45

what about poor Epstein who killed himself too? Or Mandleson with all his Chinese links becoming public spoiling his career hopes? Or media speaking ill of the dead when it came to Saville? Angela Raynor probably found it stressful when her tax manipulations became public. How dare the media bring things to the public attention!

If you can’t tell the difference between serious reporting and the sort of tabloid crap that the people I mentioned endured, then there’s not much point engaging with you. But for the not hard-of-thinking, there’s some interesting stuff on this thread.

Rachelshair · 21/08/2026 13:49

People are allowed to express views on public figures though. Especially people in the UK who have to fund the royals and their weddings, palaces, security etc. It's not unhinged. It is unhinged for anyone to expect unconditional fawning which is what they seem to expect, especially Harry - when most people just don't care, and why should they. HAM don't seem to project any authenticity and seem totally blind to how incredibly fortunate they actually are.

Isitevensummer · 21/08/2026 13:55

Rachelshair · 21/08/2026 13:49

People are allowed to express views on public figures though. Especially people in the UK who have to fund the royals and their weddings, palaces, security etc. It's not unhinged. It is unhinged for anyone to expect unconditional fawning which is what they seem to expect, especially Harry - when most people just don't care, and why should they. HAM don't seem to project any authenticity and seem totally blind to how incredibly fortunate they actually are.

Wholeheartedly agree in expressing views. And having that debate. But there’s a massive difference between that and the language used by many posters and media outlets. Remember all the stuff about “why Meghan can’t keep her hands off her bump”. I mean, wtf? It’s also fascinating to me that people might be able to acknowledge we are in very hate-driven phase of society with the rise of far right political groups but still vehemently deny that there may be a racist bias in play with MM.

bananaobama · 21/08/2026 13:59

Yea and every right to pay for her own protection officers

bananaobama · 21/08/2026 14:02

AliceMcK · 21/08/2026 13:04

I think they are absolutely bonkers to come back here, the level of vicious vitriol against them is disgusting, I think they are very brave, but I also think she was brave to marry into that cult anyway.

I’m guessing the reason has everything to do with Charles wanting them here, once he’s gone there will just be William and Kate who herself has had cancer. It’s a far cry from what the royal family looked like 10 years ago. Given every public and hidden scandal this family has gone through and come out of it as if their shit dosnt stink I think that there is a plan to bring the Sussex’s back and make them popular again for the sake of the monarchy as the alternative is loosing it.

I thought C wanted a slimmed down monarchy?

william and kate have 3 kids to carry on the dynaasty

we dont need HAM and their Hamlets. In ten to 15 years George will be getting married ajd starting the next generation

OrangeAxolotyl · 21/08/2026 15:00

EasternStandard · 21/08/2026 12:44

Yes although the media shouldn’t be that clueless, and Burnham make misleading statements, so I can understand why people were led by them.

It's very easy to check though.
However, there is a narrative, perpetuated by many, that the Sussexes are victims. I think it's very unhealthy.

TooBigForMyBoots · 21/08/2026 15:01

AnitaCam · 21/08/2026 11:44

The use of the word hate nowadays is so incredibly toxic and lazy. What happened to airing doubts, discussing ambivalence, deciding against, etc… it’s all over emotionalised under a hyperbolic label of ‘ hate’. Truly absurd.

Perhaps Sussex Derangement Syndrome is more apt.🤔