Have you ever known the woman to leave the family home and leave the kids behind? (title edited by MNHQ at request of the OP)

[Iliketocallthemsmilelines]

Or did you leave yourself?

It seems to be very rare, but it surely must happen

A friend of mine did. She’d never wanted children and had been convinced into it by her husband. She’d also been told “You love them when they’re here”. She didn’t and she took their decision that it was better to leave than have the child grow up with a parent who deeply resented them and had never wanted them.

Well on here everyone goes on about how the dads should be doing equal care at least.

So why is it different. If one parent moves out

My best friends moment her for another nan when my friend was 10 and her sister was 12. My friend is 67 now. Mum and friend didn't speak for decades but friend is now her mums carer and resents it. The sister will only have minimal contact with her mum.
Time hasn't been a healer.
Oops sorry about the typos!!!

Family friend left her house, husband and 3 children so she could get back together with an ex-boyfriend from 20 years earlier. She eventually moved in to a flat and started sharing custody more or less 50-50, but for a year or so it was just the dad and the kids in the marital home without the mum's involvement.

I think a lot of this is down to gender bias, women have no problem believing that men would cheat and leave their children ( this site is basically built on that ), but the same people don’t want to believe or understand that women are just as capable of doing exactly the same

I think it’s shit when both sexes do it. I can only judge my mum for it though, not my dad, as she was the one who did it, not him.

Only one. She had two small children in her teens with a man in his 30s. Had an affair and left him and the DC. They were 5 and 2. He kept the council property and left work and went on benefits and was happy enough so when she left the boyfriend and came back for them a year later it was very difficult. She couldn’t get housing. They grew up with him and his new partner.
The older child was my DC’s best mate through school. Seemed to work out OK but they’re not close to their mum now they’re adults. I used to talk with their mum and have sympathy for her. She was too young and he was too old. She was only 21 when she left.

My 2x Great Grandmother had 10 kids in a marriage before having my Great Grandmother as the result of an affair.

She went on to have twins with a man she told she was widowed which was untrue. He died.

At the time of her death she'd been living as married with a man who also believed she was widowed and thought she was 15 years younger than she was.

I'm sure she had fewer choices to keep her older kids or keep in contact with them in the early 20th century than now but she never mentioned her first 10 kids to my Great Grandmother.

We only found out as a family from my genealogy research.

My cousin was raised by her dad after her mother ran off with another man when she was about 6 months old. The mother never got back in touch with my cousin, despite her mother trying to sort out the relationship between the mum and baby (cousin)that didn’t involve the dad.

I am related on the cousins mums side so knew the grandmother who was told by her daughter that she was back with an old boyfriend who was the love of her life and she wanted nothing to do with my cousin and the wider family had to pick, the cousin and her dad or the runaway mother. Needless to say, no one has been in contact with the mum in decades.

Yup my mum left me on my paternal nans doorsteps at 6 months old never to be seen again

Yes, we had a next door neighbour whos partner moved in with him, leaving her husband and children behind. They were together for a few years, but last time we met him he had married someone else and they had a baby girl

Yes, my nephew's mum when he was around 1, she had patchy contact (guilt driven not desire I would say) til 4 then gave up, she tried to reconnect when he was about 12/13. He had zero interest. He is mostly a good kid, but definitely has self-esteem issues from the abandonment ...which makes for some understandable but still dickish behaviour in a teenage lad!

It probably goes without saying that I know a lot more men who have done so. She is the only mum.
I know one dad who completely ghosted his kid having maintained visitation for a couple of years, then just completely blocked her mum and hasn't seen her again since.

Of course. Why?

Yes, my grandma did (my mums mum).
So did DHs ex wife.
My best friend at school was raised by her dad.
My current best friend did too.

In my world it seems to happen a lot.

Yes, i do. The mum had mental health difficulties :( sad situation but the children have turned out well and have no contact with her (her choice initially but it's been so long that I doubt the children would want to get to know her again- they've moved on).

My mother did so I can attest that it definitely happens

Mine. Left me at my grandparents when I was 4 to go to university so I saw her at weekends, she met a man there and left one weekend saying she was going on holiday but in fact had packed up and moved around three hours away. Used to sit at the window of my grandparents waiting for her to come back. Lots of years of forced contact where she never really cared much for me being around and now no contact.

I did, he couldn't afford to live on his own. Best thing I ever did.

No but I know somebody who did. She left for another man for 5 months, she got pregnant to someone else and now they're back together.

Yes, once. my friends mum. She was a mum of 5. Youngest being probably 4 ish and we were in high school, year 8ish. I had known this mum since primary school. She always took us to rhe football practise. We were always at her house.
I would NEVER have guessed she would leave her family for another man who was a much younger foreign man.
Even now I see my old friends family photos of all them full adults and the mum is never in the photos.

I worked with a woman who did this, she left her kids completely with their dads, moved to a completely diff part of the country, she use to flit between jobs too so didn't stay in my team for long. She was particularly strange and was very odd..

My DM left my DF back in the late 70’s. She was away for a couple of years. I was around 10 yrs old when she left and a teenager when she came back. I didn’t see her at all while she was away and we only communicated via letter. DF & DM did get back together and were very happy until she passed away a few years ago. I remember writing her a letter telling her how much I hated her for leaving and that if I ever had children I would never leave them.

Interesting question.
I knew a woman who left her husband and 4 kids. We couldn’t understand why coz he was such a good family man and always so friendly. Turns out he was a ‘street angel, house devil’. Controlled her for years and v tight with money. Kids gradually went to live with her.

I left my house and older children.....19 and 15. I just left and rented a house in the local village. I was leaving for my first boyfriend from 30 years before. He moved from Scotland and off we went. My children were fine at first, then d stopped contect after 6 years and hasn't talked since.... about 18 years . My son still keeps in touch. After a life changing illness we moved abroad and have been married 23 years. We're fine, have travelled the world and I'm so glad I did it. I worked 30years ....very little time off for children, good pension. I worked like a man , you had to in the 80s.but the pension has been great.

Jadeprincess
Its fairly common when the wife takes up Higher Education and expands her horizons to reconsider her marriage, and also meets someone else in the same environment.

The marriage ends. Don’t know how often it is that the kids are left behind but possibly it’s guilt when they do.