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AIBU to discuss A level success without private school spending?

1000 replies

Absorbthecost · 14/08/2026 10:32

Parents/carers who have not spent a penny on Educating their children and they have just received great A level results.

The sacrifices made all the struggle,

I’m interested to discuss families where the child has succeeded without need for private school

https://www.gbnews.com/money/private-school-fees-soar-vat

https://www.ft.com/content/091b214d-231b-414a-8f3e-9ef9fc021926?syn-25a6b1a6=1

Those who did pay,

presumably to secure great results at A level

The same kids off to Uni, placements easier to secure as less international competition. Uni the playing field evens.

And now time to pay for Uni,

https://inews.co.uk/news/education/university-tuition-fees-11000-2030-4705197?srsltid=AfmBOorss52PSHD6xJzisWMdeNxcXDen3IrCGS49nnGH1ZyDnmvTOh_k

A child who did outstanding (without spending a penny) the same result as a family who spent £250k + The above article is a low estimation for a selective U.K. day/ boarding.

The kids holding the same result off to the same Uni, How are families feeling!?…. Did you save to help towards the Uni Fees/accomodation.

Private school fees soar to £216,000 amid VAT raid

A private day school education from reception to A-levels now costs an average of £216,189

https://www.gbnews.com/money/private-school-fees-soar-vat

OP posts:
Thread gallery
34
CatkinToadflax · 15/08/2026 11:20

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 11:17

You must be an anomaly to these official figures from the CEO of Independent schools in UK.

Or, your school being an independent and infamous for “hiding” discounts and fiddling accounts under vague reporting is just better than most.

Well its accounts have been audited and verified.

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 11:22

CatkinToadflax · 15/08/2026 11:20

Well its accounts have been audited and verified.

As have the data represented by the CEO of all independent schools in UK.

OP posts:
WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 11:30

Absorbthecost · 14/08/2026 10:39

The thought is a self driven, self motivated, resourceful child receiving the exact grade off to the same uni to mingle with the same people must today be feeling like they’ve won the lottery!

What a weird take.
I was state school.eexuatednand got straight As at A Level (before A*s were a thing).
I got to uni and had no idea what a footnote was. I didn't have any confidence to join any teams, the 'go get' attitude just didn't exist in my school and I spent all my time studying.

I taught at an excellent independent school for ten years. The experiences and opportunities the pupils got was amazing.

I get tired trying to be goady but it's so far off the mark it's bizarre.

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 11:37

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 09:03

Reality. By the CEO OF ISC

Well done to all families

with resourceful, driven children who received their A level … or coming GCSE etc results without Independent school.

I find it greatly inspiring. Some fabulous stories. Results in hand off to Uni different journey same destination.

These are goals. This is aspirational.

OP posts:
WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 11:39

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 08:46

Please don’t think like that!

it is all smoke and mirrors.

1 in 3 cannot afford it. Period.

The ones who can are paying and subsidising everyone else.

How long do you think this will continue when families gain more knowledge on school finance and bursary allocation and realise they are going without to line the pockets of others. Better to save their money for their own children. The only way for independent school to survive is to remove all tiered fee structure and everyone to contribute equal fees to the pot.

Ensuring plenty of revenue coming in and no drop in standards or cutting corners with provision.

They won’t ever do that far too many of the administration/friends/family/staff all in receipt of the discounts payments which are subsidised directly from full fee payers. This is why so many merge or close and this is happening in every independent school.

Annual financial accounts lump figures together to disguise ‘discounts’ and ‘bursary’ giving the external impression this allocation is going to disadvantaged deserving candidates from the wider community. In reality the funds are going as discounts and “hardship” support to non means tested middle class families to help pay their kids fees.

Labour understand this they knew this spotlight on private school finance would uncover sheer internal greed and whether families not affording and leaving or families saying what am I paying for and leaving it would be brought to light.

The great defenders of private school and aggressors towards what Labour have done tend to be those in receipt of large school bursary or discounts (it doesn’t take a “private” school educated “superiority complex” to figure out motive).

My point is most trying to make anyone at state feel small, cannot afford to be in private school. 1-3 be thankful your children excel and are happy with what they’ve got without having to elbow or dip toes in such a murky financial pond to “appear” to be something they’re not. 1 in 3.

Edited

You've obviously got a real axe to grind here OP!

Araminta1004 · 15/08/2026 12:15

“The ones who can are paying and subsidising everyone else.”

That is the case for the whole of society across Western democracies now. And the Governments are pushing for more and more from the trapped middle classes.

Are you sure OP you aren’t just scapegoating private schools?

TheBlueKoala · 15/08/2026 12:18

Rpop · 15/08/2026 07:35

Please please do not think this. You must live in rubbish part of the UK then? Such a ridiculous generalisation. On grades alone (as it’s the only thing I can compare as my children are young and I’ve not looked ahead), our decent states, out perform our private schools.

It was in respons to a poster who was generalising about private school kids. To be fair I've seen some snobby private school kids but it depends on the school (fees) really. The private school where we send our son is among the cheapest and they have a long waiting list so only pick good students with good behaviour. We got two state schools nearby and they are not near the private one when it comes to academic results. My son went to state primary and has kept his friends from there who went on to state and they are great kids who will do well but they do struggle with some of the misbehaving kids. My son was lucky to get a place in the private school so he doesn't have to struggle. In his class there are only 2 kids who are what you would call entitled because their parents are wealthy and they go around the world on holidays every single break. The 28 others are normal kids from middle class homes whose parents prefer paying a (relatively low) school fee in order to give their children a calm environment. They are 30 in his class just like in state school but the teachers can teach because everyone is well-behaved (or get expulsed).

Araminta1004 · 15/08/2026 12:23

The one thing that I wish the state sector did more is celebrate every child’s talents however broad from a very early age and have a specific section in each school report on what is special about that child. And then lots of aptitude tests regularly - again broadly to catch artistic, sporting, building etc talent anything really. Instead it’s constant English maths and then GCSE targets. In private schools kids get to discover their talents in broader ways and that’s why they come out more confident. Teachers everywhere work hard, I think it’s only right private school teachers get discounts.

EvieBB · 15/08/2026 13:41

Flamingojune · 15/08/2026 07:33

Yes especially the ones describing state school kids as feral....

Exactly! The hypocrisy is breathtaking!

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 13:55

Araminta1004 · 15/08/2026 12:23

The one thing that I wish the state sector did more is celebrate every child’s talents however broad from a very early age and have a specific section in each school report on what is special about that child. And then lots of aptitude tests regularly - again broadly to catch artistic, sporting, building etc talent anything really. Instead it’s constant English maths and then GCSE targets. In private schools kids get to discover their talents in broader ways and that’s why they come out more confident. Teachers everywhere work hard, I think it’s only right private school teachers get discounts.

I agree.

A job perk is wonderful,

A business that can offer lucrative job perks is an example to all…. They must be doing so well!….

No wait, they’re all going bust

Annually increasing the burden on families who pay full fees to continue to dish out discounts “perks of the job” to colleagues, friends and families at their own discretion.

For More and more families the penny has dropped. It stinks! If the individual school cannot afford to absorb the cost of “perks” (1/3 on benefits paid for by the other 2/3 who do pay in full) they need to remove them.

OP posts:
Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 14:05

WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 11:39

You've obviously got a real axe to grind here OP!

Oh no,

Im just over here absorbing the cost….

For all the wannabes looking down their noses at state kids, state provision. Whilst thinking I hope I can get my child into one of these state schools (so I can stop subsidising the 1/3 on benefits at independent schools across the U.K. fake, frauds, showing off their kids in uniform without two pennies to rub together!)

Its 1/3 up to now,

Current families seeing off ramps, transition points their benefit bill will increase this year. The provision will decline. Full fee payers will refuse to keep bailing out the 1/3 …. 2/3 …. Who cannot afford the fees.

It’s more honourable to be a state school kid.

If Labour deliver and pump in the billions though VAT it will also be more prestigious!

OP posts:
WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 14:12

Um.
Ok.

SingSling · 15/08/2026 14:14

Absorbthecost · 14/08/2026 10:39

The thought is a self driven, self motivated, resourceful child receiving the exact grade off to the same uni to mingle with the same people must today be feeling like they’ve won the lottery!

I think a pupil achieving amazing grades will be feeling rightfully proud of themselves and excited. They won’t be comparing themselves to a private school child surely?! They will have better things to think about!

SwirlyGates · 15/08/2026 14:35

It’s more honourable to be a state school kid.

OP your comments are getting more and more bizarre. I suggest you stop now.

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 14:36

WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 14:12

Um.
Ok.

Come on Labour

Use those billions and the position of being in power for the next 3 years minimum

Gobble up all these independent schools going bust due to their own mismanagement and open them up to all?…..

https://www.theargus.co.uk/news/26466813.historic-west-sussex-private-school-enters-administration/

Historic Sussex private school enters administration after sudden closure

Sompting Abbotts School, near Worthing, ceased operating earlier this year, leaving parents and pupils scrambling to make alternative arrangements.

https://www.theargus.co.uk/news/26466813.historic-west-sussex-private-school-enters-administration/

OP posts:
WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 14:36

SwirlyGates · 15/08/2026 14:35

It’s more honourable to be a state school kid.

OP your comments are getting more and more bizarre. I suggest you stop now.

And still she keeps going!!!

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 14:39

WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 14:36

And still she keeps going!!!

Sorry if pointing out the independent schools benefits bill was offensive to anyone….

The chat seems to have gone quiet 🤫……

OP posts:
WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 14:40

It's not offensive to anyone. They are just bored with you and can't be bothered to argue with you when you're labelling kids 'honourable'.

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 14:48

WhyDontILearn · 15/08/2026 14:40

It's not offensive to anyone. They are just bored with you and can't be bothered to argue with you when you're labelling kids 'honourable'.

Contentment is a very honourable trait.

Success is very admirable.

This thread was investigating Value for money.

OP posts:
Motherofacertainage · 15/08/2026 14:52

When my state school educated daughter got into Cambridge we did have a couple of comments from friends who had paid for private education. I don’t think everyone pays just for the social advantage/ extra curricular opportunities. However I would be lying if I said her education was entirely free as we supplemented state school education with lots of extra curricular trips, tutoring at gcse for one of her weaker subjects and clubs and activities in her free time. It is also true that applying to oxbridge from a state svhool can give an advantage especually if your grades are significantly above the schools average attainment grade. Some of our local private schools don’t do much better grade wise than the best state secondaries. I think the high achievers will succeed wherever they go to school; it’s the less academic who probably gain the most from private but I am a huge advocate of state education. It just needs more investment.

Todolisttoolong · 15/08/2026 15:05

A university the social distinction between private and state is not between private and state at all - it is about money. Privately educated students tend to have access to money that state educated students don’t and this can impact housing, transport, social life, part time work (or not), holidays eg Christmas ski trips. This is nothing to do with school. School is merely a proxy for wealth.

budgiegirl · 15/08/2026 15:06

KyotoKat · 14/08/2026 10:44

Not in our experience.

State school has been horrendous. Much happier in private school now.

At sixth form? Or in younger years? I think this can make a huge difference. In my children's experience, sixth form at a state school was very good - small classes, teachers who really got to know the students, no bullying etc.

I appreciate this may not be the case lower down the school, but for sixth form, I don't think the advantages of private school are quite so marked.

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 15:17

Todolisttoolong · 15/08/2026 15:05

A university the social distinction between private and state is not between private and state at all - it is about money. Privately educated students tend to have access to money that state educated students don’t and this can impact housing, transport, social life, part time work (or not), holidays eg Christmas ski trips. This is nothing to do with school. School is merely a proxy for wealth.

😂 💰

AIBU to discuss A level success without private school spending?
OP posts:
Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 15:29

Todolisttoolong · 15/08/2026 15:05

A university the social distinction between private and state is not between private and state at all - it is about money. Privately educated students tend to have access to money that state educated students don’t and this can impact housing, transport, social life, part time work (or not), holidays eg Christmas ski trips. This is nothing to do with school. School is merely a proxy for wealth.

2026,

You mean the state educated kids with savings for better Uni housing, enjoying family enrichment and ski trips …..

Or the 1/3 (up to now) of private educated kids who cannot even afford the fees….. family money blown zero luxury zero travel or cultural trips.

OP posts:
Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 15:31

Absorbthecost · 15/08/2026 15:29

2026,

You mean the state educated kids with savings for better Uni housing, enjoying family enrichment and ski trips …..

Or the 1/3 (up to now) of private educated kids who cannot even afford the fees….. family money blown zero luxury zero travel or cultural trips.

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2026/aug/13/uk-universities-face-financial-crisis-amid-collapse-in-international-students

UK universities face ‘financial crisis’ amid collapse in international students

Higher education figures call on Labour to reverse tax on fees and warn institutions at risk of ‘going under’

https://www.theguardian.com/education/2026/aug/13/uk-universities-face-financial-crisis-amid-collapse-in-international-students

OP posts:
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