How much do you do on holiday

[gollygosshhh]

Bit of a row between dh and I on holiday today - in Balearics and have spent most of the week in the resort. It’s a good family friendly place, loads of activities for kids and a beach and water park nearby which we’ve visited. But when abroad I like to see a bit more of the area and suggested a boat trip to a different part of the island tomorrow. Dh basically shot the idea down saying it’s too hot and it’ll be a nightmare with the youngest (3) who to be fair is probably happiest playing in the pool and attending the hotel activities. Older ds (12) may benefit from seeing a bit but isn’t really fussed either. But I get bored and just feel like it’s a waste to come this far and basically stay in the hotel all week.

I don’t disagree with Dh per se but feel a bit deflated and I guess guilty for not making the most of our time away. I’m not talking exclusions everyday but if it were up to Dh we literally wouldn’t go anywhere. Is it worth pushing this or do we just stick to norm.

I work part time and dh full time. As a child I only went abroad once whereas dh has travelled a fair bit. Consequently, we do view holidays differently. I like to go sightseeing and be on the go, he would happily relax at the hotel every day for a week. We have 3 dc so have come to a compromise where we do a bit of both. That way dh feels well rested when he comes back from holiday and I feel like I have explored. Our holidays are ultimately centred around the kids needs so are flexible but since we pay for it, I don't think it is at all unreasonable for us to plan things we would enjoy too. We also don't have to be together 24/7 either so can split up and do different things.

We did a week at an all inclusive in Tunisia and the children would have happily just stayed at the pool everyday. We did do that daily but we also went on a boat trip, had lunch out one day, visited a mall and the medina. We alternated taking youngest to the beach every day and we enjoyed the kid's disco and evening entertainment. I also visited the spa twice.

I don’t like to stay in a resort and prefer visiting places, foreign supermarkets, museums, galleries etc but I do think this is challenging with a three year old. When my DCs were this age it was largely beach and pool which was, of course, less stressful for me.

I may have misunderstood the post. I read it as she’s happy but feels like they SHOULD be doing more, rather than she’s actually bored and wants to do more but her husband doesn’t.

We shouldnt holiday together and your husband would hate me!

We all like to get up at 7 and explore when is somewhere like the Belearics to avoid the heat. When it gets hot 12 - 3 we go back and swim in the sea/pool and siesta if we are going out later that evening or staying up for entertainment.

Even when my kids were toddlers we did the same although not every day.

I suggested a "do nothing" day to my kids last holiday and they were not keen ;-)
(They are boys aged 13/10)!

do your boys know how to relax? do they ever have rest days or days where they wake up and no plans ? they are free to do what ever they want ?
or is everything organised for them to the minute ?
am a big believer that's its important to have the do nothing days too. your body needs rest.

People relax in different ways. I like to spend a day on a float in the sea, my DH enjoys going for a hike or playing golf. He likes to drink alcohol in the evening in the bar, I enjoy a sunset yoga class. We are both relaxing.

I didn't quote you ?

We are active holiday people - and mainly take city breaks as we love museums, historic sights, art galleries etc... We are generally out and about every day and every evening. We tend to take a couple of hours to sleep/ relax back at the hotel early afternoon but that is it. I can't bear the idea of travelling somewhere different and new and not experiencing and seeing as much of it as I can.

I tried a "relaxing" beach holiday once at Greek Island resort Two days in I was down at the bus station looking up bus times to the nearest town and ended up taking a day trip on the ferry to Turkey on impulse 😆

I was contributing to the thread.

and i was asking a question?
yes peoole have different ways to relax but parents also need to teach children it's OK to have days to do nothing it's OK not to be up at 7am. they can stay in bed sleep read etc.days don't have to be on a schedule.

Personally I don’t see the point of going to a different country and not experiencing it. I’m one of those people who goes on self catering holidays because I like to go out and about exploring, going to markets and supermarkets to shop. Listening to a different language. Going to the beach. I’d be bored stiff in a resort . We rent a villa with a pool, don’t get me wrong, we have plenty of time reading by it and relaxing too but I need to get out !

We're all the same here and get bored if not on the go. None of us enjoy beach/pool days. Our last holidays were a med cruise where we were on the go 5 out of 7 days, Barcelona, where we walked 20,000 steps every day and now Prague with a full itinerary. Even when the children were small we did lots of trips out.

@Wexone

no one needs to stay in bed all day. Unless they like a ran a marathon or something the day before

I didn't say stay in bed all day did I? I said not be up at 7 stay on bed a bit more
but aswell as that you know nothing about that person as to why they are in bed all day if they are so therefore you can't not judge or state that

This is fine, except it's also ok to want to do things you want too. So it would be reasonable for DH to mind the 3 year old whilst you and possibly the 12 year old do a boat trip, if you actually want to do it to enjoy it.

@Cherrytree86 ha ha! We went to Porto last year as Mr Monkey ran the marathon- we were up and out at 10am the next day for breakfast, a tour of the ciry and a port tasting tour. I admit we may not be entirely normal.

I believe holidays are for everyone, certainly not all about the kids that just fills me with horror catering to their every whim. However we all need have something in the day, I love to get out, not super active but I like to know where we've been, experience local food, and see some of the area plus stop the monotony - if not I'd skip the flight and go centre parcs. In the past we'd go for walks round the town, I'd get to see some of the culture and they'd get pizza or similar. Go on a boat trip and then get something like the holiday sweeties to take with them and a fun drink.
I have always said to my kids, we all have to be fair and considerate and have something we enjoy. We live in Spain now so holidays are weird but the same rules apply - they want to camp, cool they can stay in a tent but it's coming with a double bed and air con, they want a buffet breakfast, no worries but at night we eat in a proper restaurant. They love a kids club so we choose places based on that but outside of those hours we explore. My youngest is now 6 but when she was 3 we would time outings more around her nap. Don't give up on what you want just to appease the others. It's your holiday as well

I agree. Our holidays are about just as much as they’re about our children. We’re the ones working to pay for them! We make sure everyone gets the chance to do things they enjoy.

We did a couple of AI resort holidays but always did plenty of excursions. I hate being stuck at a pool for several days in a row.

DD was 2 and 4 when we were in Majorca and we had a great time exploring the island. But I refuse to go anywhere south in high Summer, we went in shoulder season while she wasn't in school and then later at Easter or in May and October half-term to places with sun and plenty of things to do.

Yes my boys have plenty of unplanned time but are pretty independent (scouts helps).

We dont own a tv (they have laptops) but they relax by calling on friends and dissapearing on their bikes to the next village....picking blackberries or swimming in the river. I know some will find it contraversial that they head off solo but it definitely builds confidence.

My eldest also always prefers group activities so often ropes his brother into board games....den building or activities such as baking etc.
I guess we all just relax in our family by being busy!